Begging Money

Financial Hardship Help

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Humbled and Hurting

Hello. I don’t know how to begin or what exactly to say to convey my most humbling and dire situation. I am a loving single mother, a hardworking professional, a homeowner (2 years this month) whom is to say the least, out of her element writing to ask for money.

I have worked hard since I was 14 years old. I have never asked, borrowed, lived off the government, not one moment of my life. I have a beautiful 15 year old daughter, whom I have had full time since she was was born and I am thankful everyday for the shine that she brings to my life. I have not dated in years so I can focus on my daughter and my career. I am truly alone and am at a loss on where to turn. I never thought, ever, as independent and hard working as I am, that I would be in a position where I have no income, due to circumstances out of my control. I have always been a pillar of strength, and I hope, someone my daughter can look up to. I feel so far from that now.

I have degenerative disc disease, and scoliosis, both of which has progressed, making pain a 24/7 companion for me now. I do not drink, or do drugs, or even take the narcotics that doctors like to push.   The past couple years my back has made a horrible impact on mine and my daughter’s life. I am not the go anywhere do everything mom anymore. I can’t tell you when we last went to even the beach or a park.  I try not to complain but I always have to make excuses why we can’t do things or why I am not the same person anymore. It has had a very negative effect on my daughter and our relationship. I know it is hard on her and that resentment has crept in even though she tries not to let it.

I had to leave my job of 11 years in the dental field, because I cannot physically be at work all day, even sitting. I worked in that field for over 25 years. I have to lay down frequently throughout the day because of the pain. In addition my anxiety and panic attacks are daily because I am worried I will move wrong and my muscles will spasm so bad I will get stuck somewhere (which has happened) and have to call an ambulance to go the hospital. I have had three of these episodes in the past 8 months and I cannot move but to go to the restroom, which is so excruciating I scream and have to go right back to laying down for weeks at a time. During these severe flare ups I can’t take care of my dogs, daughter, or myself. My daughter ends up taking care of me which just manifests the guilt.

I cannot find work from home options that are legitimate, I have tried. I do see a spinal neurosurgeon and he says that surgery, which I can not afford because I now have no insurance coverage either, may not correct the pain. I cannot afford a lawyer for help trying to apply for disability. I am at the end of my resources and I will eventually not have money for groceries much less my mortgage or anything else.

Please know that I am at the end and it is a dark dark place. My daughter and I would be thankful for any help we receive.

The picture below was taken a few years back. It seems light years back, I don’t even remember how it feels to be that woman in that picture. I miss her so much.

Last Updated:

Looking for the Rainbow 🌈

We’ve dealt with some hard times before and are perfectly content living modestly, but this has been one of those…”when it rains, it pours” seasons of life. From taking a lesser job to avoid layoff, resulting in an $800 reduction in our monthly income, to a handful of unexpected bills equaling more than we can handle…our well went out resulting in an unexpected $3000 bill, recent auto repairs, dental bills, etc… But the big one was a bill we were unaware of until our credit union unearthed it. Years ago we were in a hardship program with our mortgage company, the situation seemed a bit shady at the time, but we had no choice but to accept the terms. What we though was helping us turned into years of bad credit, resulting in limited financial options and $1000’s of unnecessary dollars being thrown away, due to only qualifying for high interest rates. (I have come to find out while currently working to repair our credit, that our credit should not have been affected in this type of program…but that’s a whole other story) In addition to the credit issues, the amount we thought was rolled back into our mortgage at the conclusion of this program, was actually set aside with another company and has come back to haunt us in the amount of $28000. While I was working to figure out exactly why we owed this and figuring out how to pay (I was VERY MUCH in contact with the creditor) they transferred it to collections saying we now owe upwards of $42000. See…when it rains, it pours. This is where I have hope; rather than seek that ridiculous amount of money (which I am currently trying to negotiate back down) I am hopeful that our story will stir up some benevolent hearts so that we can pay down some other debt and complete a handful of home improvements in an effort to roll that debt into a home refinance in the next few months. We work full-time and do side jobs when possible, but never seem to get control over looming financial difficulty lately. I am at a point in life where I long to live comfortably within our budget, have a little savings and be out from under past hardships that have come knocking at the door. I appreciate your time and genuine heart. May your act of kindness come back to you in all things good. Thank you.