Well I don’t know what to say, but that I need help. I feel bad asking for money with all the people in the world that are probably in much more dire circumstances. But I just can’t seem to get ahead, I work 55 hours or more a week, with 2 hours of commuting a day, I’m a mechanic but can’t seem to keep a car running for the life of me. All my money I’d wasted just fixing cars to get to work. I live in a rotten 5th wheel trailer in a lot my dad’s company used to own. So now I have to find somewhere to live soon or idk what I’m going to do. Was looking at apartments, I just don’t have the funds right now. My credit cards are all maxed out and the payments are making this harder. I’m bipolar, I take meds now which help immensely but I didn’t for a long time. Took me forever to just get here. Managed to quit drinking alcohol. Doing everything right and working hard and still just not making it.
Please Help Save My Business & Family
Asking for help was always an embarrassing thing for me to do all because of my EGO. I’m now finding out that it takes a bigger person to not be afraid to ask for help but I still feel somewhat embarrassed. The truth of the matter is that I used to be a youth councilor and a teacher at a private academy for trouble youth. I work there for almost 3 years but a severe accident playing hockey. My own player ran into me and I ended up somehow bed written with a Cerebral & Brain Stem Concussion, 6 Herniated disks, torn ligament that connected to the skull to the neck, and a severe whiplash in which the tissue under the skull and over the skull was severely, for 4 years. My wife had to help me go to the bathroom and feed me because I couldn’t get out of bed and couldn’t even lift a bowl. It was a terrible situation. The accident happened in 2008 and I only started getting up and walking with crutches in 2013. Never thought I would ever get up again. It was after months of therapy and healing that I started to try to find work. I slowly began doing small landscaping jobs and bought an old SUV off my mother in Law. It was later that I started doing small interior jobs and was learning all the trades with the help of different people. By the time 2015 came around I was a complete full rounded handyman.
I later started my Contracting business. Slowly and surely I started build up a small clientele and things were starting to go well. But I realized that I had to expand to make enough for my family because in 2018 My wife was pregnant with our 5th. I had big plans on how to expand but then suddenly Covid hit, and everything slowed down. I went and worked for other people and did whatever I could to keep us afloat. Once Covid was over I had borrowed money and found myself just making money to pay those debts back with very little left over for our family bills. I decided this was no better time to expand. I hired someone who would help with phone calls and quotes, someone to help go see clients and more employees. I then incorporated my business officially and everything seemed to be moving smoothly. But then a big storm swept right through Ontario and the Kawarthas, the region in which I was residing and where most of my work was, had been hit hard. We had no power for days, some places for a week. All clients I had and was newly acquiring had decided to stop moving forwards with their projects and everyone decided they had to go through insurance for their repairs. So, for 2 weeks there was no work and I so many hours dealing with insurance companies for clients trying to get what was asking for the job. Only 10% of the insurance companies were willing to pay what was required of the jobs. But it was either take what they were offering or have no work at all. So, we manage for awhile but it was getting bad. On top of all this I soon found that my office guy I hired was not including his wages or mine or even the overhead costs for the business itself and I found myself doing jobs August 2022, & September 2022 out of my own pocket. So all the money I had made was put into those job. I still have jobs that are not finished and I’m waiting to make more money so I can go back to finish them. So, I started to book for November, December, January, and February, being the slowest time of the year up her in cottage country. It was then that I found out my mother was doing well. It was at a younger age that my mother was diagnosed with Paranoid Schizophrenia and from the age of 4 to 18 was not aloud to see her. As soon as I turned 18 I made my way to North bay Ontario and went and saw my mother for the first time in 12 years. We began a relationship we were never able to have and I told her that no matter what she was a good mother and she did the best she could. She cried for 3 hours like she had been realized from a burden she had been carrying for years. It was Later on that my mother was taken in by my aunt her youngest sister and with her care she improved drastically. She had lost bad weight, they were able to reduce her medication, she know longer had to take insulin for her diabetes. It was so exciting. But 2 years ago, the summer of 2020 I had a phone call from my aunt that my mother been diagnosed with Brain and lung Cancer and she had no longer then 6 months to live. But somehow with treatment and better eating the brain tumor was gone and the lung Cancer was diminishing. She was here longer then we expected and it was for the first time that my wife, kids, and myself were going to be able to see here for the first time in 5 years because of Covid. But it was Monday November 21st that I got a call from my aunt and she told me that my mother passed in bed.
They resuscitated her even though she had a non-resuscitated listed on her medical. So, I made my way up to see her so we could as a family pull the plug. On Wednesday Nov. 23rd we pulled the plug and it was quick because she had no brain activity. The sad thing was the doctor came and told us that she never had a heart attack, she never died from cancer but rather she had gotten an infection and it got septic and it got into her blood stream. It could have been prevented.
I new at this point I was in trouble. Due to the timing of her death it was going to affect all the bookings I do for January, February, and I already postponed a basement Job to start that week. But my aunt informed me the night I arrived that she had life insurance and that I would be receiving $125000.00 so all my financial stress all went away that very second. I offered some of the money to my aunt because she was the one who took care of here for so money years. But she said this was there so for me, my wife and 5 kids. She and my uncle were ok. I took some time with my family and grieved. I released the clients to go to another contractor or to wait till after the holidays. 1 client found another contractor and the other one changed her mind after the holidays to finish the basement. This was ok because I was getting insurance money. I spoke to every single company I was indebted to and those I owed money to that as soon as the insurance money had come in I would take care of all my debts and what I had borrowed from them.
I waited and waited to find out from my aunt who was the executor of the will and who happened to be in charge of the insurance policy. In the middle of the holidays she informed me that there was a problem processing the policy. So it was 2 weeks ago Today that she informed me that the broker that sold the insurance sold her Accidental Death Insurance not regular Life Insurance but that they were looking into it. It was just today January 30th that she informed me that she was notified that there would be no money given to me. At this point I am devastated. We pushed every bill and debt you can thing off to the latest date. Everything is about to crumble, my business, our living, the people we owe money to, etc.
Our family needed this money so badly. I made decisions based on the fact that it was just a matter of time before we got the payout. The truth is it was going to save us. Instead everything is going to fall apart. I tried personal loans, business loans, and even private loans but couldn’t get anyone to lend us money cause I never started asking till it was too late. We need help. We have asked family, friends, even tried to find private lenders but to no avail. If there is someone who is willing and able to help I promise to build my business in such a way that I will pay it forward. Please I’m begging. I need to raise $16500.00.
an autistic daydream
paypal.me/mcguthy
I’ve been struggling for years now, I’ve wasted the better part of my teenage years. I’m 19 now, still haven’t got a license, still living at home. I (“got”) dropped out of school shortly before graduation because I couldn’t function in a class environment like everyone else. That’s one year ago now, my mental health has improved greatly, but if you saw me you’d still think I have nothing to show for it all. Which is true.
I want to be a novelist (cause who doesn’t?), I’ve known that since I was sixteen. When I was so close to saying goodbye to the world, but didn’t, I figured whatever is next, it’s a bonus on top of what I would have left with. Gratuity.
So here I am, holding down a minimum wage job hauling around chairs when I’m not getting all sorts of paper cuts working in the office. My plan is to get my license (3k) and buy an old Volvo station wagon (3k) and just go off into the world, meet new people, see the country, live small.
It’s not easy being autistic. First, I didn’t want to accept the diagnosis, but over time, seeing how people treat me, even my friends, it became obvious to me not only what’s “wrong” with me but how I got here, how I turned into everything I swore I’d never be. I’m a good person, the only person I’m not nice with is myself. In any case, that doesn’t change a thing. Actually I’m only still writing to crack the 400 word mark so I can post this. I hope I could convince you to help out. Without your donation, I wouldn’t be able to get on the road for another six months. And I don’t know how much longer I can do this job. It drains me. I’ve “wasted” a whole year already writing a novel that won’t sell. Good thing I saved the better outline for attempt no 2, cause last January I really didn’t write very well.
I know you don’t give a crap – oh, oversharing. Actually, if you find the right person it’s the best thing ever, just being honest and true. When you can just be yourself and not worry about how draining it is to put everything you want to do through this filter that is all you ever learned about how others behave, how you need to try and behave – no stimming for me is the hardest – and yeah, I don’t know where I’m going with this either. But that’s the thing. If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will take you there. So if you feel like chipping in that would be very much appreciated.
paypal.me/mcguthy
Down on luck and out of funds.
Hi, my name is Sheila. I’ve ran into a bit of a situation that has dissolved my weekly check. I failed to pay my car insurance, no ones fault but my own. I made the decision to not pay it in order to keep food on the table and a roof over our head. It seemed like an OK decision at the time, I’m not one to burden anyone for assistance, besides this wasn’t the first time juggling monthly bills. Rob Peter to pay Paul is an occasional norm in my household. I’ve always seemed to manage, that is until now. I was on my way to a job interview for a position that would be a promotion, a position that would help with financial freedom. Unfortunately, I was so excited I failed to notice I was traveling at 52 in a 45, which seems petty… but speeding is a reson to get pulled … which I did. And as you may already know what happened next. Yes, a whole strand on unfortunate events were about to go down. Without proof of insurance, my car was towed and placed in impound, and that’s not all. Due to lapse of insurance, my tags had been canceled and my license had been suspended- all of which I was unaware of but now taking the responsibility of. I was able to get coverage on my vehicle using my everyday living funds and making a few sales on marketplace. So just when I thought things were looking up, is when the rug was ripped from underneath me. I went to get my car- (needed for transportation to and from work). Only to then find out the reality of the consequences caused by my poor decision of juggling bills. It now will cost me $240 for tow, and an additional $40 per day. And the car has been there since January 25th. As of now I’m looking at $520 to get my car back, which will allow me to continue working. One good thing of this horrible situation, my employer has been grateful for allowing me to use pto, otherwise an uber ride daily would’ve just added to the funds that are non existing at the moment. I hopeful that there is someone willing to help me out of this horrendous situation I’ve gotten myself into. I have had to swallow my pride for this one, it’s not easy to except failure and negligence caused by self. I’ve worked very hard to provide for my family, my work ethics speck volume. Somethings are learned the hard way and this is definitely one of those. I thank you for taking the time to read my need, and if I’m lucky enough to get the help needed through this process, I can guarantee I’ll be paying it forward in the future. May you have a blessed future.
Sheila
Help me get a car please
You think you know a person until you find out you, You don’t know them at all! I am 51 and suddenly single, after 23 years of marriage 2 children 3 affairs , he left I Sadly suffer from PTSD. My so called friends robbed me , my mom got cancer I loaned my car to a friend in need who totaled it , my ex stole the insurance money I have no money, car or hope.
https://www.paypal.me/sophianordlie
New life at 50?
Married at 42, believing in love conquering all. Both never having married before. It wasn’t quite what I expected. Somehow I became the sole provider. What we agreed would be us both giving our all, 100% each, turned out to not even being 50%-50%. It was closer to 100%-10%. Believing in love, marriage, and good – I expected things would get better and they did – just enough to keep me hopeful.
I had our child at 44. He promised I would be able to stay home with our son. But he never even tried to get a job. So after my maternity leave ended, I sucked it up and responsibly went back to work. By default he became the stay-at-home dad.
Somehow though, nothing I did was good enough. I kept it positive though 95% of the time or more. I was called fat- I had 3 accidents after marrying one requiring surgery, a couple broken bones, and chronic pain – so I had gained weight, but always had a decent shape and figure. I was repeatedly told to go back to work when I would come home after working more than a full day, or even some extra hours at freelance work. Criticized for anything and nearly everything at times. Especially anything having to do with God, which he knew from moment number 1, that is most important in my life.
For several years, I kept working on being the best wife and mother I could be. Every time he stopped doing something I picked up the slack. He stopped fixing the car, I took it to a mechanic and paid. He got rid of his car, I drove our son to and from school and everywhere else. He stopped cleaning after the pets, I did. He stopped cooking, I did. He stopped cleaning, I did. He stopped caring for the property, I weed wacked and pulled thigh high weeds as best I could, paid to have trees cut down that were dying and threatening our home- I got a discount for them leaving the trees down as my husband agreed to chop them up-he never did. He stopped going places with us, like on annual vacations and to visit family.
I kept positive best I could and worked on getting healthier. I lost a third of my weight, now weighing less than when we married. I was feeling so good and told by everyone, except my husband, that I looked amazing.
Our son was struggling in elementary school. Then I lost my job. And I thought, now he will shine. He will step up so I can help our son, he will get a job, and I can work part-time and freelance as needed. I had a friend help set him up with a job, with benefits, $19/hr. He turned it down.
Instead, he said we were separated. I was so confused. Then a couple weeks later and right before my 50th birthday he said he had a place to stay and abruptly left. A week after my birthday, he said he loved us but couldn’t do this anymore and was leaving for good. Maybe even leaving the state. He won’t say where he is. He had a job for two months last year after leaving us and says he is filing his own taxes. I will lose all tax breaks for married joint filers, and do not qualify as head of household because he was not gone a full six months of the year. I may actually owe filing a married filing separate return. Still waiting on my W-2 from the job I lost.
I have been keeping just above drowning in debt due to God’s provision undoubtedly. I have been able to freelance while my son is at school and the few family members I have, are graciously lending me money as they can without me asking. I received a calendar rom one last week with $75 and a book of stamps safety pinned inside to the page for January. I am literally freelancing to pay bills on a day by day basis. Behind on some like the phone which I have a payment arrangement to get caught up.
I am still shocked. However, since looking into how to try to save my marriage – as I believe in forgiveness and my vows and our son is distressed without dad. I have learned this is not uncommon, not in the least. I sought out an attorney to find out our rights. We have a right to potentially alimony and child support without filing divorce – however – my husband has no income and you can’t get blood from a stone. He did say he was looking for work, maybe as a cashier. I have a regular job, with benefits I will be starting in February, I will not be able to freelance once I do.
So my ask… well asks … Prayers and financial help.
Any money to help with bills at all. (These are rounded)
I owe $38,000 on the home – payment is $640/mo.
I owe $2000 in property taxes. No insurance on the home currently, I need a new roof so it will end up being force placed and added to the mortgage.
I owe $34,000 on the car – payment s $609/mo. (this was a tax write off for 2022 but wont be for 2023) (auto insurance is paid to June).
I owe $38,000 in student loans – in deferment -payment normally $256/mo.
I have $12,000 in credit card debts (I know this is awful- yes Dave Ramsey I have stopped using them), I used to pay them off as used monthly – but was unable to since losing my job and husband, used what was left to pay car repairs and maintenance, medical and dental expenses and other bills, “Robbing Peter to pay Paul,” and I have only been able to make minimum payments-the interest is killing me.
After school care for me to work is $175 week.
I would like to do a save my marriage workshop, call me a fool, but I love and care my husband, believe in my vows and know people who have been reconciled after worse and after as many as 15 years, with a much better marriage now. The one by Marriage Helper seems the best, including travel from FL to TN it would be a few thousand dollars. I am making use of all their free resources available right now.
I would also like to continue with my health journey, losing a third of my weight and still recovering from 3 recent accidents and injuries- now being 50, I would like to work with a trainer – this would be several thousand to get personalize help to rebuild by strength and flexibility and establish endurance to keep up with our son who loves to run, camp, hike, play baseball, swim, and all the things a young boy loves to do -which his dad used to do with him. I want to cry, I can’t believe this. I actually am crying now.
If you will help at all and can put a memo what “ask” you are sending help for I promise to put it to that specifically. Thank you for reading this. Please pray for my marriage – our family, my son, and me specifically – at times every moment is a struggle. I know that God is in control. I know we will come out refined from this trial by fire.
Rent Assistance Needed
Hello,
This is why I’m here:
Last fall I quit my job due to office bullying by a co-worker. I didn’t plan my exit correctly and quit before I had anything else lined up. I have been struggling with depression and felt like I didn’t have any other option other than to leave as soon as possible. I thought finding a new job wasn’t going to take too long, but now I am going on 4 months of random interviews here and there with no offers, I was ok financially (able to make rent and pay some bills) for the first 3 months but now I have run out of money and have absolutely no friends or family to help me with my rent or bills. I am in danger of getting evicted from my apartment starting in February.
My rent is $1600 and I am in need of $3,300 to cover the rent/late fees I owed for January as well as February’s rent. This is my first time doing anything like this and I am grateful for any sort of help.
A little about me:
I am a 32 year old single female and have struggled with depression and anxiety since I was a child. I don’t have a conventional type of family that would be able to or even willing to help me out. I live alone and never had a situation like this happen before. I work very hard and had to learn to take care of myself at a very young age, asking for help from anyone has never been an option for me. I hope those reading this can understand my situation.
I know that it was a huge mistake leaving my job before I had something lined up but I truly could not handle the work environment. The environment consisted of unwelcome touching of my legs and hair, and other things like pulling up my street on Google maps and insisting I point to where I lived, and interfering with my actual work by convincing others in our department I wasn’t doing my job correctly. When I started at this company a year and half ago I was the most depressed I’ve ever been in my life, I turned into a very quiet and tired person and I simply couldn’t handle the environment any longer. I still don’t feel like myself, but I’m trying hard to get better.
Even so, I am still filled with shame and regret for leaving without having anything else lined up.
If you made it this far, thank you for taking the time for read this. Anything helps.
Paypal:
https://paypal.me/dcasdonate?country.x=US&locale.x=en_US
There’s no where to run and no where to hide
My daughter and I were put on the streets after a real estate agent scammed my dad for over 250,000.00.
My dad needed to sell his house that my daughter and I had been living in for fourteen years, he needed to pay for cancer treatments. He told me that he would give me proceeds from the loan so I could get another place. Sadly that would never take place.
My dad had entrusted his neighbor and real estate agent to do a walk through and then he would put an offer up. He did a walk through and informed my dad that the garage was being used to cook drugs. My dad asked me if that was true, I told him no, why would he ask me that? He replied; “because he’s a real estate agent!” I stopped him there and walked out. That would be the last time I ever spoke to my dad, until the day before he died. My dad chose to believe that agent and in turn the agent himself bought my dads house for $100,000.00. The house could of been sold for 350,000.00. The agent took advantage of a dying man and a strained relationship between father and daughter.
The agent never followed any Washington state laws when dealing with a drug lab. If I had been cooking in the house we would of been forced to leave the premises until it was cleaned by an accredited lab and pass an inspection. The agent also informed my dad that the house would need to be ripped down to the studs. The agent himself never did that to the house.
I was fortunate to stay in the house for another year while Covid was taking place and the CDC’s moratorium was still in place. Unfortunately for me that moratorium would be overturned a day before my ejectment hearing. I didn’t realize until I’m in court via zoom that had taken place. I lost that case, I was no match to a seasoned lawyer and the judge ruled that I was not a tenant and would not be receiving a court appointed attorney. Not sure how that computes? I would have 24 hours from the time the sheriff serves me.
Needless to say I didn’t have a storage unit yet because there just was not one available. I finally got one just days before I was to be out. In the end I had two bedrooms that I barely moved anything out of that I had to leave and wait for this agent to release to me. When that day came he gave me very little notice and charged me $283.00 for storing my belongings in my former house for 11 days, that was a “reasonable storage fee.”
I noticed right away that some of my things were not out there so I called the cops, the cop verified that the items I spoke of were in the house but that agent never did return them to me. I had to set up another time to get my things and was reprimanded by his lawyer, saying; “hadn’t he already gone above and beyond for me?
That agent whom I’ve never met before came into my home and in ten minutes destroyed my life as I knew it. My dad never spoke to me until his death, nothing could ever fix that, everything else can be fixed or replaced but I will never get to have that time with my dad back. The snowball effect from that agents actions have cost me dearly, and it keeps going, all my possessions are about to be sold at the storage unit if I don’t pay them $800 and move out. I would have to pay for another storage and be able to move it to one in a moving truck.
I have ran out of options? I’m hoping to somehow get into a mobile home. It’s the only affordable alternative for me.
I will forever be great full for any help I do receive. I’m ready to take this experience and turn it into something positive for my daughter and myself.
Family in dire need!
There are thousands of known species of mold fungi with diverse life-styles
Trichoderma
Is the one That has changed my family’s life drastically.
The McCloskey family has been through more than most families can even imagine. Dad is disabled, and mom had to go back to work full-time after she became disabled herself. They were evicted from their home because it was literally making them sick with mold and fungus, and they are now living in a hotel. They have three cats and one service animal, and they are struggling to make ends meet.
But despite all they’ve been through, the McCloskeys haven’t given up. They’re still fighting for a better life for themselves and their children. And that’s where you come in.
Your donation will help the McCloskeys pay for housing and legal assistance as they try to get back on their feet. Anything you can give will make a difference in their lives. Thank you for your generosity and compassion.
Mold is also capable of growing both indoors and outdoors and thrives in warm, damp and humid settings. It can exist in any season and almost all environments. Moreover, mold can appear in many different colors, and sometimes as spots. In addition, mold has a musty odor.
If mold gets into your HVAC system, the damage can even be greater. The mold is likely to spread throughout your ducts and will keep multiplying under the right conditions. Turning on your HVAC system will help it spread throughout your entire house.
Mold thrives in numerous places, both indoors and out, and you can find them wherever there is moisture. Exposure to mold, regardless of its type, can result in an array of health effects. Possible health issues that can be caused by exposure to indoor mold include:
• Nasal irritation
• Throat stuffiness
• Rash
• Watery eyes
• Eye redness
• Nasal congestion
• Wheezing
• Bronchitis and pneumonia infections
• Eye issues
• Coughing
• Headache
• Joint pain
• Fatigue
• Skin irritation
• Muscle pain
• Concentration issues
We have had all these symptoms for Past 2 years. Now being in hotel withdrawal symptoms from not breathing in the fungus on a daily basis. Are bodies detoxing a little more and more everyday.
80% of people experiencing homelessness are temporarily homeless due to sudden changes in their lives.
45% of adults experiencing homelessness have in the last 30 days
Our health was not taking seriously from local and federal authorities. The live electric wires hanging from ceiling where smoke detector should have been hanging. The state fire marshal just passed that buck to next agency who told me they couldn’t help either. The judge and court bailiff both got asked to look at their own court room as the paint seemed to be peeling off wall. Would this be the same mold/fungus I have become deathly allergic to but forced to breath it in and fight for my family’s right to Fair Housing which is Our Federal Rights to live in a safe habitable home. We are trying to raise awareness on this situation our family has endured to try and protect others. We have literally had leave all personal belongings behind as the fungus has taking control of all 16 years of memories and memorabilia. We have already started the task of purchasing new clothes and all other things that are going to be needed.
We have lost a lot in the last month, but our daughter’s smile and the wonderful staff here at the Country Inn by Radisson have been a life saver. We would be so appreciative for any assistance you can provide. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.
Thank you so much for considering making a donation to help our family. We are currently homeless and living in a hotel. We have been evicted from our previous home because it was literally killing us with mold and fungus. We are a family of three, with three cats and one ESA service animal. We are in dire need of housing and legal help. Being homeless almost feels like a target has been put on my family’s safety and well-being. Anything you can give would be greatly appreciated. Thank you so much for your generosity.
main things needed asap
new clothes unfortunately we thought they could be saved we were terribly wrong. The rashes we broke out in.
New shoes.
- Trying to rebuild a 9 year old girl is going to be a challenge.
Food
extra nights at hotel we’ve already spent a lot we’ve been here a month
The McCloskey’s
PayPal.me/nmccloskey03
a desperate cry for help
Good afternoon! I am a woman from Latvia who really needs help. I have heard of generous people who help those in need. I’ve never asked anyone for help, I’ve always done everything myself, but this time I’m asking for help. because I can’t do without it. I trusted a man who tricked me and cheated me, mortgaged the apartment and shook him, and now my daughters and I live in a rented apartment, I was also fired, but I work an extra job, but it is not enough to pay all the utilities and loan payments, very we want to get the apartment back and renovate it so we can start life anew. I try to do as much as possible, but nothing works, I am a disabled person of the third group, I have had two back operations, I am only supporting myself because of my daughters, in order to buy back the apartment, I need 40,000€. please, good people, help me and my daughters to start a new life without debt and suffering. Please help would be appreciated. I am a desperate mother who wants my daughters and I not to end up on the street. Thank you for your understanding. Best regards, Evica.
The Best Part of Me is My Kids
I always knew life could be unfair. And I always understood that sometimes bad things happen to good people. But at the same time, I truly believed in my heart that if you put God first, tried your best to be a good person, and worked hard that things would generally be ok. Be strong and persevere through the tough times because they too will eventually pass. I was wrong….
Or at least that’s what it’s starting to look like. This is my last ditch effort that I’m making to hopefully prevent what’s about to happen from happening. Because if it happens, my life is over. I will have no reason to live. And no… I’m not suggesting I would ever harm myself. But I would basically just be waiting to die. I will never again experience joy or love or peace of mind. And it’s not fair. It’s not right. Someone please help me.
If there were any kind of alternative to what I’m doing here, I would try it. But I’ve already tried everything. Sometimes I can’t even believe this is real. This is like the stuff you see in movies. I guess reality can be stranger than fiction. Because this is real. It’s happening to me. To us. And I don’t know how to stop it.
I have 3 beautiful daughters. 14, 10 and 3. I met my oldest when she was 3. She was my wife’s child from a prior relationship. The bio dad wasn’t around, and I eventually adopted her. She quickly became my child. As for the other two, I raised them both since they were born. And when I say I raised them, I mean it more than most fathers could probably identify with. Because I was a stay-at-home dad.
My wife and I got together in 2011. We both worked but she always had a much better job than I did. In 2012, after our first was born, because of the drastic difference in our wages, it made more sense for her to return to work following her maternity leave. We had discussed several options. Neither of us were comfortable sending our infant to daycare. No judgement on anyone else’s choice to do this. It’s just something we weren’t comfortable with.
When they get a little older, we liked the idea because it starts to socialize kids for kindergarten but even then, it was only part-time. The cost of daycare isn’t cheap. Plus, my wife worked 50+ hours per week, and she enjoyed being able to come home and have the house cleaned, the laundry done, the beds made, the kids fed, the diapers changed, etc. Anyone who has ever held the position of homemaker knows it’s a full-time job. And I did it very well.
There were times that I questioned our decision about this. But my wife used to tell me that I was worth more to her at home then working some minimum wage job. I didn’t have any kind of career or profession like she did. I thought I was doing the right thing for my family.
But I also knew that the kids would grow up eventually. And the need for a full-time caretaker would become less and less as they got older. So during these years that I was the “house-husband,” I put myself through college. I was technically a full-time student but because I could take many of the courses from home online, I was able to juggle both things.
So the years went on. My wife continued to get raises and be even more successful at her job. And I did my thing at home. The two older girls turned out to be the most well-rounded, intelligent, talented, and beautiful children you could ever meet. I expect the same for our 3-year-old in the future. I’m not perfect by any means. But I knew I was a good dad. I could tell by the results.
We ended up buying a home. And even though we were living off of one income, we all lived pretty comfortably. My original plan was to go back to work once the two older girls got old enough to be on their own a little bit more. But right after I graduated from college, my wife expressed to me that she wanted another baby. Our youngest was born in 2019.
So even though this was quite a change of plans for me, here I was with yet another infant. I don’t regret anything having to do with my kids. The time I spent home with them was some of the greatest most fulfilling years of my entire life. I loved my kids, and they loved me. And even though I wanted to utilize my degree, when my wife decided she wanted another child, I was happy to oblige her. It’s not like we needed the money. We were doing pretty good. So why not make her happy?
We had a good marriage for a lot of years. My wife was a little controlling in some regards but hey, when you truly love someone unconditionally, you take them for what they are – both good and bad qualities. She insisted on controlling all of our finances. She paid the bills. Everything was in her name (except our house). And maybe I was being naive, but I didn’t ask questions. I mean I trusted her. She was the one earning the money so I figured it was her right to maintain that facet of our marriage.
After many good years together, in 2020, things started to fall apart. The painful details are not important. But I discovered she was being unfaithful. There was even a question as to whether our youngest was biologically mine or the product of one of her affairs. And unfortunately, it wasn’t a matter of her transgressing, getting caught, being sorrowful, and maybe us attending some counseling to keep the family together. That’s not what she wanted. She wanted to continue to do what she was doing. And she wanted me out.
But I was the stay at home parent, remember? She controlled everything. I had no money, nowhere to go, no resources, nothing. And she had no plans on helping me get on my feet or get into an apartment or something. She just expected me to leave empty-handed. After building a family and a life with her for almost 10 years, she just expected me to leave having nothing to show for it.
I refused to leave. I didn’t want to leave my girls. It’s not like I was the dad getting home at 5:00 p.m., spending a few hours with the kids, and maybe doing something on the weekends. I was with these girls morning noon and night, since they were all very small. I had such a close attachment to all of them. I suggested cohabitating under one roof, co-parenting peacefully, but no longer being together as man and wife.
That may sound crazy to some, but I didn’t want to leave and be the “every other weekend visitation” dad. That’s not who I was. I wanted to wake up in the same house as my children. And I was willing to put up with all her extramarital, extracurricular activities just to be able to do that. We tried but it didn’t last very long.
I had no desire to be with anyone else. In fact, to this very day, I still have not been with another woman intimately. My faithfulness and my honesty never really seemed to matter to my soon to be ex-wife though. It was December of 2020, not long before Christmas, when my wife decided she would get rid of me no matter what it took.
We have domestic relations laws in this country for a reason. For a lot of years, abusive husbands got away with way more than they should have because of how the laws used to be. The way they are set up now allows someone who has been beaten, or someone who is afraid for their life, to quickly go obtain a restraining order without any questions asked, and without any proof being required. The new laws were written specifically to be this way because someone who is truly trying to get out of an abusive relationship shouldn’t be hampered by the usual rules of evidence, or by a slow moving judicial system. The way the domestic laws are set up now, I’m sure it has saved many lives. The downside of the whole thing is that it leaves a person who wants to misuse the system plenty of room to do so.
I never hit or threatened my wife. And she had absolutely nothing indicating I did. She didn’t have bruises or any type of injuries. All she had was one hell of a story to tell our local family court system. Needless to say, her lies were believed, and the next thing I know state police showed up at my house and gave me about 10 minutes to gather everything that belonged to me, and put me out in the cold.
And the worst part about all of it is that temporary custody of my children was awarded to my wife, meaning if she did not want me to see my kids anymore, unless I wanted to go to jail, I could not. All I had known for 10 years was my wife and my home and my family. And now all of it was ripped away from me. I never understood what having the rug pulled out from underneath you meant. But I do now.
I’m so glad that I was able to graduate with a bachelor’s degree prior to this taking place. Don’t get me wrong, I am still struggling, because I had to start over with absolutely nothing. I work full-time as a social worker. The pay isn’t great and I barely survive. But I do survive. I live in a pretty run-down apartment, but it’s really all I can afford right now. And it wasn’t long before I started receiving divorce paperwork.
My wife has money for an expensive attorney. I cannot afford one. I tried getting help from several legal aid agencies, and all of them have a waiting list a mile long. I’m forced to represent myself and I’m not doing so well thus far She has gone into these divorce hearings and completely lied about almost everything. She claims that her wages are much much lower than they actually are. And I know this to be true because we were together for so many years. I know what her income is. I’ve seen our federal tax return statements. But again, her lies are believed because they are coming out of the mouth of a paid attorney, and this resulted in in order for child support that is crippling me.
Believe me, I’m not bitching about having to pay child support. Of course I want to contribute to my children’s financial needs. But it has resulted in a situation where I will not be able to save for an attorney, she will continue to lie, she will continue to utilize the money and resources she lies about having, and I will never see my children again.!
She lies about her own situation, and she lies about my part in all of this. I have not seen my children in over 2 years. She has moved on to a new boyfriend. She wants to start a happy little family with him and she wants me to be a distant memory that she can soon forget. I have tried several times, asking the courts to allow me to see my children. Because of her dishonesty, and my inability to retain an attorney, I have not been successful.
If I had a lawyer, or if I knew what I was doing, I’m sure I would be entitled to a lot more than she wants to give me in the divorce. We own the house together, but by the looks of things, I’m not going to end up with anything. And I know, I know, people get screwed in divorces all the time. That’s not my issue.
She can have the house. I don’t want a thing from her. But she is asking for sole custody of the children. Between the restraining order she has, and that, I will never be able to see my kids again. And this is all based on lies that she told. I was a damn good father. I don’t deserve this. And I have learned what a narcissist truly is and what they are capable of.
Please be clear about something. Her goal is to completely take my children away from me. If I don’t retain some kind of representation, she will be successful. I don’t care about anything material that we accumulated while we were married. She can have all of it. I just want to see my children.
And I am running out of time. I am already working and earning as much money as I possibly can, but the more I make, the more they will take in child support. Child support for children I’m not even allowed to see. None of this is fair and none of this is right. I don’t deserve this. I’m not an unfit parent. There have never been any protective agency investigations on me or anything of that nature.
Her job in our small community gives her a lot of power and a lot of influence, not to mention the fact that her family is also a very important family in this area with a lot of money. I’m not even sure exactly how much I would need. I know lawyers are expensive. But whatever anyone can find in their heart to help me with I would appreciate. God bless all of you.
https://paypal.me/demart3969?country.x=US&locale.x=en_US
Self sufficient community dream
I have a dream that I would love to make happen.
I am a Christian, a wife and a mother to two boys.
I have experienced darkness most of my life until I found Jesus, and discovered that he is absolutely the way, the truth and the life. I want to bring light into people’s lives and show them that there is another way. Not in a pushy, evangelical way, I just want to open a space and invite people to be apart of it, all people from all walks of life. I am getting ahead of myself, here is a little bit of information about me. I currently live as a caretaker and I am very lucky to have a home to live in, however I have a dream that I want to make a reality and the only thing stopping me is money. I have no spare money that I can put away, it all goes month to month. I home educate my boys so I work my business around my sons (I spin and dye wool for knitting)
I want to buy a piece of land and a little home/base. I want to live a natural, self-sufficient lifestyle. I want to raise my own animals and grow all my own food. I want to pass this on to the next generation, and the next.
I want to open this space up to a community to teach people these old forgotten skills. How to grow food, how to forage food, how to raise animals for food/ wool ect. How to make clothing, tools etc.
I believe we are so far removed from how we were designed to live that we now live in a society where everyone is depressed but they don’t know why.
I am also a beekeeper and want to be able to teach people this too. Ways of living naturally and in harmony with the earth.
It will be accessible to all people from all backgrounds regardless of money. I want people to have a space to come and grow veg, look after animals etc and work towards things as a community. Beekeeping workshops, all kinds of things. For example, If a family want to come for a holiday but have no money, they can come and help out in exchange etc.
I want to help people struggling with their mental health that just don’t have access to natural spaces to have a place to come and find purpose, whether that’s looking after animals, growing food, or helping with workshops etc.
The little farm will be open for families who have children with disabilities/ issues to come and spend time with the animals. I would run it as non-profit charity and possibly open a farm shop/ artist/ maker space to keep an income coming in. I want to make this world a better place. Thank you for reading this, if you have got this far.
Amy
Here is my PayPal link:
https://paypal.me/AmyHymer?country.x=GB&locale.x=en_GB
House for my sick mother
Hello, my name is Yeison. I am a 20-year-old farmer who was forced to stop studying to take care of my mother, all because of the death of my father. Although we have lived in the countryside for a long time, we do not have a home, since we work on a farm in exchange for money and a place to live. The reason for requesting your help is because my 50-year-old mother is sick, as a consequence of a long life working in the fields. She has developed a problem in her hip and lungs (a consequence of cooking with firewood), for which she needs therapies and medications. To carry out the therapies we have to go from the countryside to the city for about 4 hours and stay somewhere for 1 day, this is impossible for us since we don’t have that much money, but we have managed for example I had to borrow money and sell some things we had at home. In addition, to complete the situation, they fired us from the job we had in the fields because we must be constantly traveling to the city, the bosses gave us a month and a half to vacate the country house. After that time I don’t know what we are going to do, where we are going to go live and continue with my mother’s therapies. At the hospital, the doctors told us that my mother needs to leave the field and start therapy (since we stopped all the treatment), so I would like to be able to buy her a house in the city and for the initial expenses, I need $24,000 USD, so that We can go live there and thus continue with the therapies without having to pay for a hotel, tickets and food continuously, since that is why we leave the therapies. I would like to be able to help my mother to have a better quality of life, I can work for medicines and city expenses and while my mother recovers I would like to be able to continue studying to have a better job and better pay to survive in the city. I am someone who is willing to do anything in order to improve in life, I would wholeheartedly appreciate your help to this humble peasant family to recover their mental and physical health, I am desperate, I don’t know what else to do to help my mother to buy the house in the city. I don’t want to buy him a big house, just one where we can live comfortably for a better quality of life. More than for me, for my mom, since I don’t want to abandon her because I don’t have anyone else in life. please I need help
https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/workingfarmer
Help me to pay for Childcare
I’m Silvana, a mother of two and a student. I’m living in Croatia with my two little children. I’m completing my third year of BA studies.
My elder is 3 years old and the younger just turned 1 year. Their father left us all of a sudden, so I have to figure out everything on my own, which is very overwhelming and difficult at the moment. I was not expecting to be a single parent or be in a situation where I have to fear if I can put food on the table, how would I pay the rent, etc. I had the right to childcare support from the government until recently, 1 year after giving birth, so from last month I’m not receiving any money.
In the last FOUR months, I was trying to enroll my children in kindergarten, but there is no place for babies under 1 year at all, and after that only if BOTH parents are working (legally the father also has the rights until a court decides differently) and there is a free place for the kid. Where we live there is not enough place in government kindergartens so I could only take them to private kindergarten which is very expensive. Due to my situation, I got promises from the kindergarten that the children will be accepted (at this moment there is no place for them), but not before the next school year, so from September. But until then I have to feed them, pay the rent, and pay the utilities. But I can not do that if I’m not working, and not earning money. But I have no place for my children so who will take care of them while I’m at work? I’m so confused and desperate because I want to work, I even have job offers but I can not start working until I organize the childcare for them in private kindergarten.
The children’s father left us, and I don’t have any family or support, I’m on my own with two little children and no money.
There is a kindergarten which would be a place for us but it costs 500 EUR/month for two children. The government kindergarten’s cost is about 100 EUR/month/child. In Croatia, the average salary is around 800 EUR. If I go to work and earn 800 EUR it wouldn’t be enough for rent (400EUR), utilities (100EUR), food, transport, and private kindergarten (500EUR).
I’m here asking good people who are willing to help, for money to pay for kindergarten until September, so I can go to work, as soon as possible. The amount I would need is 8×500 = 4000 EUR. That is the amount I need but ANY help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you in advance.
https://paypal.me/silvanavlis
Trying to escape family with addiction and mental illness
2022 completely drained me financially and in so many other ways.
February 2022- my husband had a hard time recovering from COVID. He passed out and has a seizure at work in February during this time and couldn’t work fora few months. My brother was arrested at the DMV for getting angry the same day my husband had the medical emergency. My mom called to tell me as I was following the ambulance to the hospital with my husband. My husband was still testing positive for COVID so I couldn’t stay with him. I went to my brother’s house to let his dogs out and feed them since he had been arrested. When I arrived I almost broke down completely. My brothers house looked like something from the TV show hoarders. What’s worse is that it was actually my mom’s house. She was letting him stay there before she moved and hadn’t sold that house yet. His poor dogs were living in filth. Months old food, Pepsi cans stacked everywhere, trash piled up to the ceiling in some areas. I took the dogs back to my house. He got out the next day, but I quickly realized he was not ok. He had struggled with opioid addiction in the past and had been on methadone for years. I think he took too much and then ran out and was having withdrawals because he was in a state of psychosis. He was talking about demons and God and believed he was being sent visions of a past life or multiple past lives. My husband was released the next day, but struggled physically and cognitively for months after. I was afraid to tell my mom about her house and my brother. She had also struggled with psychosis in recent years. We now know it was because of withdrawals from pain pills after having a knee replacement. My brother got worse so I found a friend and we drove overnight to get him in a hospital near my mom. Once he was admitted I drove home to focus on my husband. Over time I noticed my husband got more and more depressed. He started drinking more she more. He was so used to being busy and working that it was literally killing him to stay home.
March 2022- I found a company to help clean up my mom’s house. She asked my husband to remodel the house so she could sell it. We spent a lot of time over the summer working on it.
July 2022-However, like my brother, she also went into psychosis due to stopping pain pills suddenly after being on them for months. She became paranoid and suspicious of me. She started believing I was a witch and had special powers. She thought my husband was actively trying to kill her. I don’t know if you have ever tried to get someone admitted for this type of thing but it isn’t easy. It didn’t matter that she was seeing & hearing things that weren’t there or went weeks without AC in 100+ degree weather. Sometimes if your lucky you can get them to go to the hospital and then you can get them admitted by signing an affidavit but even that didn’t always work. It’s sad to think about all the other times that similar things had happened with her where I had to learn how the system works the hard way.
July 2022- my mom ends up in a psych unit after enough situations with her neighbors calling the police. Thank God she was in a city and not the rural areas where I live. Just three years before, a similar situation happened after her first knee surgery and she often became violent with me because she believed I was a witch. Any time I called the police they just wanted to arrest someone and it was so scary. Luckily this time they brought a social worker and took her to a hospital. She spent 21 days there.
August 2022- my husband was still dating with depression. He was working, but took a big loss with having to stop remodeling my mom’s house. And he started drinking more. My brother was more lucid than he had been but he was still talking crazy sometimes and with my mom and husband down I just started to struggle myself. I work full time but bills add up quick. My main goal became keeping my teenage daughter from going down with all of the stress. My husband went in for a medical detox but signed himself out after a day.
September 2022- my husband was starting to do better with the drinking but work was slow to non existent. We had started building a house before all of this happened but the delay in money and time left us living in a camper longer than expected. I took out a few personal loans to help temporarily.
October 2022- we moved into the garage/shop area of the house because we had enough finished to make it work.
November 2022- it was expensive to heat the shop. I had a $900 electric bill. My mom had started to do better but it’s always rough reconnecting after an incident life that cause her memories are clouded Ave even if she didn’t think I was a witch anymore, I could tell she got weird feelings sometimes. Plus my husband was still extremely depressed about the situation because she took so much out on him while she was sick, and I didn’t want him to go back down again.
December 2022- I realized my husband’s construction account hadn’t been paid and started working to pay it off in addition to the personal loan payments and other bills piling up.
January 2022- the rear axel breaks on my car. $2000 repair. I tried to sell our camper since we are in the house for the most part, but we are upside down in it and will have to continue making monthly payments. My credit is officially in the tank from maxed out credit cards and unpaid medical bills.
So, basically I’ve dug myself into a financial hole this year and I’m struggling to see the light. I’ve done everything I can to help my family but I’m just drained. I don’t feel like I can even begin to focus on myself out my daughter because I keep getting pulled down further financially. I’m not a fan of asking for money, but I really need help digging myself out of this.