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Being a single mother especially in today’s era can be extremely overwhelming. If you are one of those mothers who is doing it alone every day you know what I am talking about. It seems like the bills just continue to pile up and never end.

Researchers have said that just in 2015 year ending alone over 80 percent of the households in America that we’re single households we’re in fact ran by a FEMALE head of household which we’re mostly living very poor.

Many people may say well there is government assistance for them to get a grant but it’s hard to find and information regarding that said topic anywhere. So in hopes to help the single mothers out in the world this article will give you some insight on the different assistance topics we can cover including where and how to get a grant or scholarship. Also, you will read and see how simple it is to receive help with income expenses and medical insurance.

Are there really grants for a single mother?

Of course they do but these grants are not only for single mothers. However, that doesn’t mean there isn’t help for a mother to receive one. I know its mind boggling that the government hasn’t had any means created for money for a single mother that is actually in the shape of a grant. One thing the government does for a single mother is they assist them through a group or have set sponsors through a company, and sometimes they are covered by the actual income assistance completely.

Below are a few websites that will redirect you to free items that you can get just for registering on the website.

Low Income Assistance for Single Mothers / Government Grants

As I said there is not an official grant for a single mother available that is FEDERAL. However a single mother can go through federal programs and register and sign up for them. Those kinds of programs are usually for households with low income. Which means you would also qualify for Welfare. No matter what the case these are programs to help those who make below the limit and live poorly.

Below are different types of assistance based in the United States.

TANF – TEMPORARY ASSISTANCE FOR NEEDY FAMILIES

TANF is a crucial for many low income families located within the US.

With TANF you receive a small amount of cash every month that you can use toward your food, rent, and other necessities. However you only receive TANF for up to 60 month limit.

If you are a single mother and you have children in your home who are less than 19 years old you are eligible for TANF.

SNAP – SUPPLEMENTAL NUTRITION ASSISTANCE PROGRAM

Food-stamps or SNAP as other people may refer to is financial help for meals. You can receive money every month to place food on the table if you are on low or no income.

For most of Americans living in poverty SNAP is potentially the only assistance they can get.

Research has shown that in 2015 SNAP benefits have helped at least 45 million Americans. Most of the ones who receive the stamps are under are up to the age of 18.

When you go to use your benefits for SNAP you have your own personal debit card to ring your groceries up with at the register. If you are interested in trying to get on with SNAP benefits all you have to do is fill and application out and send it in or take it into a local office that deals with SNAP benefits.

NSLP – NATIONAL SCHOOL LUNCH PROGRAM

This is a program that gives free (or discounted) food to students whose parent’s income is bellow a poverty level. The income needs to be at least between 130-185 percent bellow the poverty line.

Most the time if a person is a receiver of SNAP benefits their children will be accepted into this program for free lunches. But, that doesn’t mean if you don’t have or receive SNAP that your children are disqualified.

You need to contact your child’s school to apply.

TEFAP – THE EMERGENCY FOOD ASSISTANCE PROGRAM

Food for the American families who are in the poverty range not matter what the age.

If you have received food stamps before or any other program assisting you and helping you such as the ones in this article you could also be approved for this program.

You will need to contact your State distribution agency to learn more about the Emergency food assistance program.

Local Food Banks

A food bank doesn’t exactly fit into the whole “Grant” program area as it is actually a location in your town where you can get food if you are in need.

Do not allow you or your family to go without food. If you ever reach that trouble you can call 211 and ask them where the nearest food bank is based on your location.

More then 200 food banks exist with the feeding america foundation and they supply enough food to feed over 40 million people.

WIC – WOMEN, INFANTS AND CHILDREN PROGRAM

This program includes a package deal where you as a mother are able to receive healthy foods, whether you are pregnant or a new mother, and also to children who are 5 or under.

WIC is a program that is temporary and only used for a short amount of time – usually between 6 to 12 months.

EARLY HEAD START / HEAD START

These programs are for children up to 5 years old.

You can receive free child’s medical and dental care along with their schooling, and dietary needs.

Find your closes headstart office on their website or call at 1-866-763-6481.

Insurance for unemployment

This is a special program which will pay you weekly if you are unemployed and it had nothing to do with you for you being fired or let go. You will only be able to receive this benefit for maximum 26 weeks. Different states have different benefit rules. But most states will average out at about 45% of whatever the average weekly income is.

Single mothers who are out of a job temporarily can find solace with these benefits and can help make the burden less for themselves because this pay will restore what you have lost from losing your work.

If you want to try and get this started and opened for you, you will have to find your local unemployment office or apply on the website for this specific program. Most states will allow you to also try to sign up for this over the phone.

Section 8 housing

Section 8 is basically a program that helps a family be able to pay for their housing. If approved you will receive a voucher of up to 70 percent of your bills (utilities and rent). You are expected to pay the other 30 percent.

If you want to apply and feel you qualify you can get in touch with your local office involved with public housing, the HUD office.

CCAP – CHILD CARE ASSISTANCE PROGRAM

This is a benefit for families who can’t afford to place their children in daycare while working.

You still have to pay a certain percentage but it isn’t a big lump of money. The less you earn, the less you need to contribute.

EITC – Earned Income Tax Credit

It is a tax benefit for people with low income. You could potentially get as much as $6,000.

If you normally have a tax rate of $1050 but you are allowed $5550 then you get refund of $4500.

There is a Children’s Tax Credit too for as much as $1,000 for EACH child.

LIHEAP – LOW INCOME HOME ENERGY ASSISTANCE PROGRAM

LIHEAP is a program that is a one time help to help pay for heating / cooling expenses.

Most of the time this is for the disabled or families with children or disabled person in the home.

If you need any extra information regarding this topic you can get in touch through the number 1-866-674-6327 or a local number for your local LIHEAP office.

WAP – WEATHERIZATION ASSISTANCE PROGRAM

Weatherization assistance program lowers energy bills for families in need. Usually the elderly and families involving children are accepted and put to the top of the list before all.

Your monthly income need to be below 200 percent poverty level.

To apply, find a local WAP center.

Medicaid

Medicaid is help with medical expenses. If you do not have health insurance this gives you certain benefits as long as your income restriction meets the level it should.

A lot of single mothers may meet the standards to be recipients of Medicaid even if you are unemployed.

Every state has different rules about Medicaid plans. You can find out exact requirements on this website.

Together with ObamaCare it ensures that even single mothers who didn’t receive any health benefits will now be able to have coverage.

CHIP – CHILDREN HEALTH INSURANCE

CHIP gives children without health insurance a chance to have health benefits all the way up until they are nineteen. It is for families whose income is too high to receive Medicaid benefits.

It provides every type of benefit you can think of — dental, eye exams, and even annual doctor’s exams.

Every state has its own rules. If you would like to learn a little more about this specific benefit you can call 1-877 Kids now (1-877-543-7669)

Federal Pell Grants

Aid program for students of up to $5,815 for those in need to be able to set foot into college.

This is the best opportunity for a mother who is single to finally be able to finish her schooling and finally continue in the workforce. The money is completely free of charge with no interest rates or paybacks ever.

You need to fill out an application and submit it for a pell grant and have it turned in on or before June 30th of every year.

Federal Supplemental Education Opportunity Grant

Similar to the Pell Grant. If you already have had pell grants and you are at the top of the charts in need you will be first on the list to receive this. Depending on a persons needs that are wrapped in with their financial struggle will ultimately decide who will receive anywhere between $100 too $4,000 annually.

Charities

Charities can be a way to seek help for you and your children whether you are in need of food or clothing or even housing. A lot of charities around the world actually have their own food banks that they run and they will give you bags of free food.

If you go to salvation army a lot of the times they will let you sleep there if you have no where else to go especially if it is a result of violence.

Churches

Most churches will offer you food and clothes or maybe even a place to stay if you have been recently kicked out by the one you are living with.

To find information on this you should look through your phone books local listing or yellow page. You can also research online and see what churches are available to your area and call them and ask what services they do offer.

Loans

Single moms can receive loans usually relatively quickly but I would not recommended that at all. You could potentially go into debt and not be able to rise back from that.

Sometimes you have no choice because you have to fix your broken car or maybe pay for utilities and food and need the help right then. But you have to be able to pay that loan realistically quick.

Pay attention to your credit because if you try to get a loan through a bank or anyone they will check your credit score and see if it is even available to be able to place a loan out to you. If it is a loan that is for payday loans or credit card advances they will not run a check but you will end up paying more after fees and costs.

Line of Credit

If your credit is decent some people ask a bank for a loan personally. Most of the time this is a better idea then asking for a payday loan because if you need quick money with lower rates of interest this is it.

Personal Loans

On a personal loan interest is lower dramatically but you have to pay in instalments. It doesn’t really fit criteria for an emergency. Normally if you just tell them you do not have any more funds and that is why you need this they will turn you away. If your credit is poor you will not be able to even touch this offer.

Short term (payday) loans

This is a very popular type of loan. You may know it by the term “Cash advance.” The interest runs really high on these and it is a loan that is only for a small time frame.

This is a loan that would more then likely be considered if a problem arises and you needed to repair your car or had a disastrous dental emergency. You have to know for sure you will be able to give every penny back.

If you do not pay this type of loan back you could be in loads of trouble financially.

Credit card cash advance

Do you own a credit card? If so you will be able to get money from a bank as easy as 1, 2, 3. This is not a method that is highly praised though because as soon as you start taking money out of the bank the interest keeps rising and you also are charged for using and pulling out of the bank a fee. This is potentially the easier options if you do need cash asap but you have to pay it back and make sure you absolutely can.

When it is all said and done grants will not solve your money issues within your home if that is what you expect. To get a grant is definitely not easy it isn’t a walk in the park by any means.

If you are looking to get a more stable source of financially being stable you should probably look in areas around you or find a women shelter until you can get back up on your feet.

If you think you have all the time in the world you can apply for other areas of assistance such as Food stamps, HUD, and etc. They do take a lot of time and effort for someone to get back with you and let you know if you have been accepted and enrolled. Try finding a part time working job as a way to financially start becoming stable again.

The moral of this is you can not expect a grant to fall into your hands without effort and take all your worries away. They are only here too do one thing and that doesn’t usually fix anything with your financial setting.

This is all on you and what you decide, no one else can decide for you.

Last Updated: February 7, 2023

Thank You for Reading & Your Consideration

Before I begin, this is my first time doing this tbh. Where do I begin?
in 2019 I separated from my husband because he beat me severely and tried to attacked me with a knife while I was holding our baby boy. My oldest son tried to defend me. We called his closest friend and he came and took him away. I never let him back in the house and it was the end of our relationship. His actions were a mix of his anger problem and drug use. I didn’t know and wasn’t aware of the signs of drug abuse until it was too late. Needless to say, it was the most painful thing I had to go through leaving a man that I still loved because he wasn’t good for me and my kids. I struggled to move on and took me about 3 years to finally feel the freedom and security to finally move and accept everything. Those 3 years were hard and my oldest son developed depression and tried to hurt himself because of what happened. I have tried to make my kid’s lives the happiest I can and provide for them the best I can all while battling my inner feelings and my own depression. When me and him broke up, I had nothing, a few weeks prior to the beating I had received kidney surgery due to a massive kidney stone that had to be physically taken out via surgery. So when he beat me, I was still recovering and I had no job. After the beating, he took away my car, my bank cards joint, and we were left with nothing. I managed to find a job even though I was still In pain and recovering. I have been taking care of my kids since then, he pays child support when he wants to. I Managed to get full custody after going to court and divorcing. He is still very disrespectful and rude and blames me   For destroying his family. He obviously moved on not so long after we broke up with An acquaintance of ours of all things. With COVID and the inflation, things are just so much harder, and I’m not okay, I feel depress and extremely overwhelmed. I try to so hard every day to work full time and I even opened at Etsy shop hoping that I will make some sales. I’m not staying put, I’m trying very hard. But I often wonder, I wish I had a partner or a helping hand. I see people winning the lottery big time like the Mega millions and I’m happy for that person but I always wondered  why it couldn’t have been me, I would do so much good . And I don’t even care about the full millions just with a couple thousand I would be happy.  I currently live with my 2 children, my mom And myself. I’m the sole provider and pay for everything. My mom got injured Cannot work. I feel like I’m falling, literally all the exhaustion and stress has me feeling sick all the time. I’m hoping that God brings me a lot of sales and I’m hoping things change, I’m trying very hard here.  Just need a little uplifting. Thank you for reading.

paypal.me/heyitsana

 

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: USA

Last Updated: February 7, 2023

Newly pregnant college mama

Hello (: I don’t really know what I’m doing but I know I am not in a great financial spot! Thank you ahead of time for reading my story and thank you for anything you can do to help us!

I want to start by telling you about myself! I am 23 years old. I am currently attending college to get a bachelors in Marketing. The ultimate goal is to get a masters in design. I absolutely love designing logos, ads, shirts, etc. for businesses and individuals. I currently have a full time job doing accounting for a small business. I love my job, but it is not my forever career.

In August of 2022, I went through a traumatic experience. I was 35 weeks pregnant and had a high risk pregnancy starting at week 10. This was the first time I was pregnant and I was terrified through the entire experience. I had a great support system and an amazing team of doctors behind me. I was going to appointments every week sometimes twice a week. When I went to my appointment on August 25th I was told news what no mother wanted to hear. They told me there was no heartbeat and that I had lost the baby. I was told to go home and wait until a room was available for me. I was called to the hospital about 10 hours later and they medically induced me. I was in “labor” for 26 hours. I got to hold my baby for the next 12 hours and then I was sent home.

When I found out I was pregnant 2 weeks ago I was terrified and confused. I have been with my boyfriend for almost 5 years and I have been on birth control since I lost my last baby. When my boyfriend found out he was scared and decided he couldn’t go through another loss, so he decided if I was going to keep the baby that we needed to take some time apart so he could decide if this is what he really wanted. I stressed myself out so much that I was having bad pains and ended up in the hospital. When I was sent home from the hospital, I was put on bed rest for the next few months. This is not an ideal situation for a 23 year old trying to graduate college, working a full time job.

I know for a fact that I am going to do everything in my power to give this baby the best life that I can. I have been trying to find side jobs that I can do from home to make some extra money to cover the costs of my doctors appointments.

I don’t want to ask anyone for help or for money but being on bed rest I am limited on my options. Anything that anyone can do to help me would be greatly appreciated. Again, thank you for taking the time to read my story, and thank you for anything you can do to help me.

paypal.me/urbanmama

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: USA

Last Updated: February 4, 2023

Help me to pay for Childcare

I’m Silvana, a mother of two and a student. I’m living in Croatia with my two little children. I’m completing my third year of BA studies.

 

My elder is 3 years old and the younger just turned 1 year. Their father left us all of a sudden, so I have to figure out everything on my own, which is very overwhelming and difficult at the moment. I was not expecting to be a single parent or be in a situation where I have to fear if I can put food on the table, how would I pay the rent, etc. I had the right to childcare support from the government until recently, 1 year after giving birth, so from last month I’m not receiving any money.

In the last FOUR months, I was trying to enroll my children in kindergarten, but there is no place for babies under 1 year at all, and after that only if BOTH parents are working (legally the father also has the rights until a court decides differently) and there is a free place for the kid. Where we live there is not enough place in government kindergartens so I could only take them to private kindergarten which is very expensive. Due to my situation, I got promises from the kindergarten that the children will be accepted (at this moment there is no place for them), but not before the next school year, so from September. But until then I have to feed them, pay the rent, and pay the utilities. But I can not do that if I’m not working, and not earning money. But I have no place for my children so who will take care of them while I’m at work? I’m so confused and desperate because I want to work, I even have job offers but I can not start working until I organize the childcare for them in private kindergarten.

 

The children’s father left us, and I don’t have any family or support, I’m on my own with two little children and no money.

 

There is a kindergarten which would be a place for us but it costs 500 EUR/month for two children. The government kindergarten’s cost is about 100 EUR/month/child. In Croatia, the average salary is around 800 EUR. If I go to work and earn 800 EUR it wouldn’t be enough for rent (400EUR), utilities (100EUR), food, transport, and private kindergarten (500EUR).

 

I’m here asking good people who are willing to help, for money to pay for kindergarten until September, so I can go to work, as soon as possible. The amount I would need is 8×500 = 4000 EUR. That is the amount I need but ANY help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you in advance.

https://paypal.me/silvanavlis

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: EU

Last Updated: January 22, 2023

I’m finally able to follow my dreams

Hi,

My name is Haley and I am a 35 year old, single mother who lives in Louisiana.  I have literally exhausted any other option of getting the funds that I need before I came here.

My life up until now, has been riddled with trauma, heartache, and little to no support from family, friends, or anyone else.  I was severely abused as a child, both physically and sexually.  I have been raped several times as an adult.  I suffer from C-ptsd from these traumatic events.  I say all of that to say, I have had it rough.  Life has not been kind, and I have never been given anything.  I have worked since I was 16 and I have never asked anyone for anything.

I have the opportunity to finally go back to school and get the degree I have always wanted.  I have the funds through student loans and financial aid to cover tuition, however I am also in need of a couple of items to get started.  I need a new laptop, I need to pay my internet service up for a few months because it is online school, and I need to be able to pay my rent for two months so I can focus on school.  I recently lost my job due to downsizing, and I am currently looking for a new job, but it is taking some time.  I don’t have good credit at all, due to my ex-husband using my social to ruin it.  If I could get this money, I would be able to finally follow my dreams.  I take care of my three children, alone, with no help from either of the fathers.  I want to get this degree so I can get a good paying job, and also to show my children that if you never give up, you will eventually be able to follow your dreams.

If I was able to, I would simply take out a loan and pay it back over time.  I am not, however, so here I am.  Doing the one thing my parents would roll over in their graves about.  I’m begging.  I am trying so hard to be everything my kids need for me to be.  I need this so badly, and I wish that weren’t the case.  I hope one day when I’m in my Psychology career that I can also help someone in need like me.  I appreciate the time you are taking to read this post, and I hope that no matter whether you can help or not, that you have an amazing life because just being willing to help is so very important.

paypal.me/haybelles28

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: USA

Last Updated: January 20, 2023

Struggling single mom anything helps

I’m not even sure if anyone will actually see/read this. So I suppose I really don’t have much of anything to lose going out on this limb. I’ve never done this but I’m  exhausting all resources at this point.

I fell unemployed right before the holidays and things are starting to get really tight and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t starting to worry..

I’m a single mom to a bright beautiful little boy. Over the last almost 7 years I’ve raised him on my own with no help from his father whatsoever.  Doing anything needed to make sure he was taken care of. Even if it meant getting little to no sleep working 2 full time jobs to make ends meet or traveling out of state for weeks at a time and spending any bit of free time with him. After being out of state on and off for 7 months I couldn’t stand being away so I tried to find a more local employer so for once my son could have is mom home at night for the bedtime stories hugs and kisses so many of us received as children.

I found a job helping people in recovery assisting them in their program and giving tips and tools to help move forward down their roads of newly found sobriety. I was elated to have such an opportunity beings as I, myself am also an addict in recovery with a year sober from alcohol and 4 years from drugs. Im thankful to say I get to keep fighting everyday since I got sober.

I started my new job and things seemed like they were going to work for the better. A few weeks went by and I started to notice things that made me feel uneasy. Whether it was how the clients were being spoken to or wrongfully treated because other employees saw them as less than the mud on the soles of their shoes merely because they chose to use drugs. I kept my thoughts to myself for a while because I couldn’t risk stepping out of line and losing the one opportunity I had to be home every night with my son. I wish I had known that working there sure seemed to be a blessing would turn out to become by far the most toxic manipulative work environment I had ever endured.

The day came I finally had enough when I spoke out to my supervisor over a matter I had overseen and told him my thoughts on it. (Mind you he knew my background and everything I never kept it a secret). My supervisor looked at me and only replied with well you’re not much different than them right? So if not here what else is there really for you? My blood began to boil and I made the best decision I could. I walked out of the building immediately and never went back.

I’ve been doing odd jobs, side work, cleaning homes and vehicles just about anything to make money to keep up while applying for jobs online, in person, going to work place centers. Trying to hold my composure and not disrupt my son’s schedule and routine and stability.

I pray every day for things to start looking up again and I know they will in a matter of time. It won’t be like this forever. Whether it’s financial help or simply keeping us in your thoughts and prayers with us and for us. Anything will help and know it’s all greatly appreciated. My PayPal link hasn’t been copy and pasting correctly lately I’m not sure why. So I’ve added my cash app as well below.
Again thank you for taking the time to hear me out. 

PayPal: https://paypal.me/shannonnjoe
Cashtag: $BabyDuck978

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: USA

Last Updated: January 19, 2023

Life is a struggle

Life is a struggle and unable to make ends meets. I am a mother of 3 kids. I am struggling to keep food on the table and decent clothes on them.

How it all started. I have 3 kids. My oldest daughter is 16 years old who lost her father in a car accident. He lost control of his truck causing the truck to roll on top of him and it went up in flames. It was a very rough time for my daughter. She was very depressed and falling behind in school. I did all I could to help her get threw this and it still a struggle for her. He passed away one day before her birthday. So every birthday is a struggle for her.

My 2 youngest kids sons 12 years old and daughter 10 years old. Have same father who is still alive. My son lived with his father and my daughter lived with me. All in tell a year ago my son came to live with me. His father abandoned him for a girl he started dating. Which this has effected my son extremely bad. They had a good father son relationship in tell this happen. So my son has trust issues with his father now. And they don’t talk much. The father puts him down for moving with me. When his uncle committed suicide he left my son his truck. Will the father will not give it to him because he moved in with me. And he was so happy that he was going to get the truck but now he is so up set his father well not let him have it.

My daughter and her father never had a relationship. He just choose not to speak to her because she lived with me.

So I lost my job 3 years ago due to my father being in and out of the hospital with kidney failure. So 3 years later he is on peritoneal dialysis. And almost lost him 3 times. With me being the only one to help him its been a struggle to see him go threw all this. My mother can’t help him very much because she is struggling with her health. She almost died 2 years ago with TTP blood disease where you get blood clots in your small veins. After blood transfusions she is a survivor.

So out of work and 3 kids. I have exhausted my credit card limit to keep up the rent on my house. But I am unable to pay my rent and have to move out and back into my parents house. And the kids are upset because they have to share rooms.

So I am asking for some help so I can get back on my feet again. My car broke down few days ago. It has exhaust leak and o2 sensor and 2 flat tires. So I need help to get my car running and this being my only transportation. I have 1860.86 in credit card debt. 17,000 in student loans and 400.00 to get my car fixed and moving expensive. And with moving in with my parents I would need to get there wiring fixed in house so it safe. Need to pay rent and phone bills. I am trying to get at least 35,000.

Anything help and a greatly appreciated all and every donation received. So please help this single mother get threw these tough times. Thank you

https://www.paypal.me/beauty25beauty

 

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: USA

Last Updated: January 19, 2023

Please read! PLEASE 🙏

Hello, I would like to thank anyone who has stopped long enough to take the time to read my post.

I have no words to define my appreciation!

Id like to start by saying I’m a 45 year old woman that has been through many struggles but I’ve always managed to make it through. Honestly looking back it feels like my past has been just one big struggle starting at the young age of 14 when my parents divorced and both moved away. My mom moved 4 hours away and immediately remarried and my dad moved about 15 mins away and remarried as well.

They divorced over my mom being unfaithful and at the time I blamed her for tearing my family apart and refused to move anywhere with her and the woman my dad remarried made it perfectly clear in more ways than one that I wasn’t important. She had 4 young kids of her own at the time and instead of my dad protecting me from not feeling just as important and loved as his new family he decided to leave me. He made the choose to leave me at the age of 14 on my own while he raised his new wife’s 4 kids. From that day on I was no longer my dads daughter. At the time I felt like I had lost my everything and in a way truly did! I was a young girl lost in this big world that had absolutely no one. I felt abandoned, not loved, alone and very scared. I was forced to grow up way faster than I should have and was left to figure the world on my own. I ended up pregnant at 17, had a baby boy at 18 and had no idea what kinda life was still ahead. Needless to say the father and I didn’t work out. He ended up with  custody of my son. I had no steady home for him and my baby daddy’s parents could provide a home as well as everything else I couldn’t so I didn’t try to fight it. I had to make the best choose for my child and that clearly was not with me at that time. It was one of the most painful things I’ve done but I knew it was the right thing to do. I was still a child myself lost in this huge world.

Everything I owned fit in a Nike gym bag, I couch surfed mostly, stayed with who ever I could until I wore my welcome out and just did the best I could day by day. Eventually things turned in my favor and I was fortunate enough to find the man I would soon call my husband. I finally belonged and had people I could call family and I cherished every moment but unfortunately it didn’t last long! I ended up pregnant with another baby boy, gave birth and had the best 3 months of my life until that tragic morning came. My precious baby boy! I’ll never forget waking up that morning. It was January 28th. I remember that date clearly because my bday is the 31st and the same day I laid my baby to rest. I’ll never forget looking over to see my 3 month old wasn’t breathing. He was cold to the touch and even though I refused to say it out loud I knew my baby was gone.They called it SIDS! I called it the first day to total destruction. I had finally knew what it felt like to be needed, to be loved and to love with my whole being and it had been ripped away from me in a split second. I totally fell apart. Still just a child at 20 by this time I couldn’t help but feeing cursed, not deserving, not worthy. I had lost all will to live. All i wanted was the pain to go away. So like many others I became a heroine addict. I had nothing left to lose. It took the pain away and that’s all I cared about. I stayed in a state of what I can only call hell for a few year until I was pregnant again. A baby girl this time but that did not stop me from the drugs and all the terrible things that comes with it. I stole, lied and a-lot more to keep my addiction going. I lost custody of my baby girl and the man I married became a drug addict as well. He also became fantastic at spending his time and his bed with any other woman than me and I just knew i couldn’t feel worse pain. I eventually found myself alone again just this time it was on the floor of a prison cell with a 5 year sentence after stealing a purse from a grocery cart. Boy that was hard times too. Going through the withdrawal alone, knowing my husband was with another woman while I was locked away, not a single visitor the entire time I was there. I honestly believed hell was earth and I was in it. It took a long time and a lot of hard work but I did recover, I got released from prison and knew my baby girl was counting on me. I’m all she had and I had to get myself together for her. I took it day by day and I succeeded at getting her back, got a full time job I loved and a place to call home for me and my girl. Things were going well partly because when i was released from prison my husband was on his way in. If that weren’t the case I don’t think I would have accomplished all I did but eventually my husband got released and said all the right things to win me back, next thing I knew I had a family of my own again. I loved my husband more than life itself  but the truth is he never loved me like that. He chose to go back to his addiction and other woman once he was released. I dealt with it for years in fear of losing the one person I truly believed had ever loved me. I saved up enough money for a down payment on a house and made my dream come true. I actually succeeded at buying a home and my husband and i was great as long as I overlooked his problems. I didn’t wanna lose him I wanted to share my success with him.  I did get a lucky break and was able to buy what I call home on land contract, It was a rehab so got a fantastic deal and was on cloud 9. All id been through I didn’t think I could succeed at anything let alone at being a home owner. Never been so proud and still am to this very day but eventually I got tired of all the devastation and hurt from being constantly cheated on and realized my daughter deserved more than a daddy on drugs so I finally gained the strength to part ways with him to only find him in a hotel room just one month later on Feb 14th. Yup Valentine’s Day. He was dead on the floor from a drug overdose. Oh no what did i do? I kicked my husband out instead of trying to keep getting help for him. I gave up on the man I loved  instead of continuing to support him and now he’s dead? Gone! Why me? Why is my life this way?

So soon after I decided it was time my mom and I try to start mending our relationship. I’m so grateful for that decision I made. I cherish those days. Soon after that she was diagnosed with cancer. She passed away 6 months later on Dec 25th yup Christmas Day. Jesus what did I do wrong? Why is this my life? I sit here now in that sand home I’m so proud of but also in fear cause I know it may not be mine much longer. I’ve lived a tough life, I’ve struggled very hard in my days. i was on my own at 14, never knew where my next meal was gonna come from, raised myself, overcame addiction, lived through prison, sat with my kids in the dark from not being able to pay the bill, I’ve buried my baby in Jan on my bday, said my last good bye to my mom in dec on Christmas Day and buried my husband in Feb on Valentine’s Day and so many more struggles to list. I’m now in a place where I’m about to lose my home. My daughter got pregnant at 17. I’m now raising her baby girl. I paid my house off last year but couldn’t afford the taxes. They were sold to a 3rd party and I can’t fail my granddaughter. She needs a safe home. She deserves it unfortunately I have no way to save it for her so I’m reaching out to someone willing to help me. I have no family to ask and I just thought if I got lucky and someone read my story that they could understand how badly I need a break in life. I’ve worked so hard and I’ve made it so far. I am out of options and have mental and physical disabilities that forced me out of work. My taxes doubled when they was bought so they are 2, 500 dollars. I just relived the worst 3 months of my life I do every year and I’m aftaid I just don’t have the strength to fight this battle. I have no money for the electricity, I have no money at all but at this moment I still have my home and my beautiful granddaughter. I can’t lose either. My home is my biggest success and my granddaughter is what gets me out of bed every morning. Please anyone capable of anything no one would be more grateful than myself. Thanku so much for taking the time to read this. God bless.

paypal.me/KimberlyCain

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: USA

Last Updated: January 19, 2023

Getting Back On My Own 2 Feet

Hi. I’m Madi. I am 27 years old. I have a 7 year old daughter and I am a recovering addict. It has not been easy getting clean and staying clean without the help of friends and family. But I have chose to do it for me and my beautiful baby girl. I grew up with addict parents and I refuse to let my baby girl grow up the way that I did. She deserves a much better up bringing and even though I didn’t see that in her first couple of years on earth, I sure see it now and I’m trying SO hard to give her and I, both, the wonderful life that we deserve. Unfortunately, we have no family to help us and covid dug me in a deeper hole than I could have ever imagined. I work so hard to keep the same roof over our heads and to make it seem to my baby girl that we don’t struggle but she is now starting to learn and see that life it isn’t easy and she asks how she can help make money and that breaks my heart. I never want to go back to the party life and I want to be able to give my baby girl everything she needs AND wants in life because I never had that and she deserves better than me. I want to go to cosmetology school and become a blonde specialist and eventually own my own salon or one chair gig in my own home and live a life where I love what I do and to be able to make my own schedule to be there for every big thing for my girl and be 110% financially stable so that my daughter never has to ask me what she can do to help her mommy make more money when she’s much too young to even be knowing any of those life struggles. We will remain on top and strong and resilient no matter what. But I can not continue digging this hole deeper and deeper when all I do is work as hard as possible to climb out of it but only digging deeper happens and I can’t seem to find the ladder to climb out… ever. My daughter deserves so much better and I don’t want her stressing out along side me at such a young age… my heart breaks that I can’t do more to shield her from knowing my struggles. Any little bit helps me and my baby girl grow stronger and more stable this year. I need to get us into a stable home where we can stay for more than just a few weeks or couple of months at a time. Moving so much is exhausting and not healthy for her little tired and kind hearted soul. I never ask for much help. Truly. But right now, I really really really need some extra pushes to help me out of this hole I am in so that I can show my baby girl what happiness and strength and never giving up is going to make us. All my love, gratitude & pure vulnerability. Please. Any little bit to help me show my one true love, the precious and perfect little girl I brought into this life how to be a hard working, HAPPY and truly kind soul from now to the end of time. I love you all. 🖤

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: USA

Last Updated: January 14, 2023

Mother of two, about to give up completely.

Hello. 

To whomever might read this, I’m going to tell you a little bit about myself and my issues. 

First of all, I need you to know that talking (or writing) about myself is something that I rarely do. I’m not an open person and I never ask for help in personal matters. People at work find me to be polite, trustworthy and a good listener. But none of them know about the constant stress I’m under. Sometimes I feel my heart beating so hard I can barely stand up. I try to take a deep breath to calm down but there’s no space in my loungs so I cough it up again. I don’t think this state is visible just by looking at me, I’ve got a calm personality and I guess I manage to look calm while it feels like something’s exploding inside me. 

As you might have guessed, my financial situation is my bigest problem. While writing this, I have about 40€ in my bank account and my next salary will be paid out in 2,5 weeks. 

I have two kids who is living with me every other week and with their father the other weeks. Two boys at age 8 and 10. They are amazing and they bring so much joy into my life. I want them to have everything that a child could possibly want, but the only thing I am really able to give them is love. Love isn’t bad, but there’s so many physical things that they need, like new beds (they’ve outgrown them), clothes (also outgrown), healthier food and doing things like going to the movies or visit the zoo sometimes, even going out for ice cream (!) and it breaks my heart that they prefer being at their dad’s home. And I can’t blame them. 

I’m actually trying not to cry now, I don’t even know if I’m going to post this, it feels so personal. And so deplorable. But on the other hand, I’m not sure anyone is going to read it. 

So how did things get this bad, you might ask. I’m not really sure myself, but looking back at my life so far (I’m 34 years old btw), I’ve always been kind of poor. I grew up with a mom who didn’t care about anything and she lived off the child support which did not get spent on her 4 kids. Growing up I was very insecure, I had one or two friends, I wore second hand clothes, I had to walk 3 km to school every day, and home every evening regardless of the weather condition. As soon as I got home I buried myself in books and writing diary entries and poems. Somber writing got me through my teens and I left home as soon as I could. Now I live across the country and I don’t have much contact with my family. 

I’ve done pretty good for myself considering the past. I got a job in programming and the salary felt decent at the beginning. Now I know that people can make a lot more doing what I do but I can’t really move to another area because of the kids. I’ve never been good with cars and I think that’s the beginning of the downwards economical spiral, or whatever it might be called. I bought my first car and I felt great, I had gotten a loan and I was paying it every month. The car was not exactly new and eventually it needed to be replaced. Buying my next car cost a bit more but I was able to get the loan and all was fine. I soon realized my car was too small especially with two kids. So I went to trade it in for another in the same price range but it was apparently in such a bad condition that I got almost nothing for it. So I took another loan. By this time my credit was not great having taken on more loans before completing the payments so the interest got much higher. 

I struggled on for a bit and had to buy food on credit cards because of the loans. When that last car got a flat tire on New Years eve I got so tired of unreliable cars I decided to trade it in for a Volvo because they seemed to be most reliable. Believe it or not, the dealer was stunned when I rolled my car in for a trade. He’d never seen a car in such bad condition and was surprised that I even made it all the way there. Needless to say I got almost nothing for it. But with a very high interest loan I was able to get that Volvo which I’ve now had for about 4 years. It’s not new and it’s almost gone 125 000 miles, but it still takes me to work and the kids to school every morning. 

Where I live we have this authority that, if you can’t pay off your loans in time every month and you get behind, they go in and they take some of your salary to spread out to the different lenders. This is what they do to me, leaving a small amount that they’ve calculated as the least amount that a person can survive on. And I wish I made more money from working a full time job, so that they could take more. Every month my debts are getting even bigger and I’ve realized that I’ll never get rid of them. This is my life now and I’ve made this mess all by myself. 

I don’t really think I deserve to ask for help, maybe that’s why I’m hiding this mess from everyone. But maybe there’s someone out there who has more than they need and would like to help others. I need to tell that someone that I’m here, I am struggling, I have begun to fear for my health because of all the stress and I am in need of some help. 

Best regards.

paypal.me/pb9545

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: EU

Last Updated: January 13, 2023

A Fear of Failure

Good morning, good afternoon, and good evening to every single one of you who is taking the time out of your life to read this. I appreciate you all regardless of if you help. It is taking a great deal out of me to even sit here and type this. I was not raised to ask anyone for anything, you need it you get it, which I have stood strongly behind until today because I am here asking strangers for help.  

First, let me introduce myself and begin by telling you all a little about myself and my son and our unfortunate events.  

My name is Alexis, and I am a single parent to one amazing, smart, talented, handsome, blue-eyed me is Lexie and I am a single parent to one amazing, smart, talented, handsome blue eyed little boy. 

Rewind back to 2003 I found out I was pregnant in Feb. of that year I was in high school and Feb. of that year I found out I was pregnant. In May of that same year 2 days before my high school graduation I found out I miscarried & would have to walk with my child still in the womb. I could not have surgery until the following day. One of the worst weeks of my life. Depression sunk in bad. But fast forward to Oct of that same year, I met my ex-husband who was in the Navy and we had orders to go to Sigonella, Sicily. We were excited, blessed, and happy. Moving right along to “05” when we started trying to have a baby. Long story short, I was told by 2 doctors that it was never going to happen. My womb was full of scar tissue from the surgery I had for my miscarriage. Devastated was an understatement and here comes depression again.  

I was in that deep dark horrible depression for years. On top of this my ex and I decided to get a divorce and I just know it was all my fault, I could not get out of that horrible place I got accustomed to. But being a mom was the only thing I ever wanted to be in this life, and in an instant that dream was shattered, ripped apart, and stumped on.  

17 years later, in “19”, I finally came to my senses and accepted the fact that I could never have any kids of my own and I was okay, and I was going to be okay. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine what happened next.  

March of “20” I was sitting there talking to my son’s father and trying to figure out my cycle situation. It had not come for going on 3 months now. And let me tell you that was something I could bet money on every month and win, because that sucker was coming and coming full force, never missed a month, a day, nothing. I was still in denial and blamed it on overstressing myself. I did not want to feel that sick feeling all over again and get back to that state of mind I was in when I lost my first child and the doctors gave me that ridiculous news. 

 Against everything I was feeling inside the next day, I purchased 4 pregnancy tests. I took one as soon as I got home from the store. The first test said positive! I did not believe it, so I went on to take the remaining 3 over the next couple of days. Again, they all said positive! I had to go purchase one more. And yes that one too said positive! Now I’m a believer and I made a doctors appointment. He confirmed that I was most definitely having a baby, due date was Sept 28, 2020, & he also let me hear my baby’s heartbeat to calm and settled my mind and nerves!  

In July of “2020” I was put in the hospital for a month and within that month I had my son 11 weeks (about 2 and a half months) early. He stayed in NICU for 75 days (about 2 and a half months) before he could come home to me. It was the best and worse experiences of my life.  

After my son came home, things with his father started getting rough. The mental, emotional, and physical abuse started slowly. I had my blinders on (never did I ever want my son to grow up in a broken home) because I was determined to make things work up until two weeks ago when it worsened.  

He cost me a lot of things in life. My job, my home, my vehicle, my son almost, my family, my friends, and the list goes on. My family and friends turned their back on me because I would not turn my back on my child’s father. I wanted to be a family and raise my son with both parents but that is something I learned now is not possible.  

I am a full-time student on top of this, luckily he did not do anything to jeopardize my schooling. The sad part about all of this is I carried him for all these years. I paid for everything! Bills, vehicles, gas, food, diapers, wipes, baby clothes, clothes for him, whatever it was we needed or my son needed we had it because of me. Then he goes and does the most outrageous things and I lose it all in a instant, 

My son did not have a Christmas because the money I had saved up got stolen from me. (I think it was by his own father). I am trying to get him a couple of gifts since he had to miss out on Christmas. I believe that there are good-hearted people in this hateful world we live in, and you being so generous will be extremely helpful and beyond appreciated.  

I am also trying to get into a new place because this couch-to-couch thing is not made for a mother and her son.  

I am just stuck in a rut and I just need help getting out of it and I have nowhere else to turn to. I am an honest, hard-working, momma who would do anything for my son, I just need a little push/help right now so I can get back on track!  

 

 

Thanks in advance and may God bless you all, Happy New Year! 

Alexis & son 

paypal.me/alexisbrooke0213 

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: USA

Last Updated: January 8, 2023

Single mom/widow trying to start over – again.

Names have been changed*

TL;DR
I have made too many choices in my life that have helped others while leaving me destitute. I am working hard to change that now, but have accumulated debt this year and have nothing to start with.

I have one biological son that is currently 11 years old. He does live with me and is a wonderful kid. I do not receive financial support for him, but am pursuing it.

We are currently trying to move out of my former partner’s home after our husband passed away in a car accident. She is keeping everything – house, money, furniture, etc. I am only bringing our personal belongings and my car in the separation.

This is the third time in my life that I’ve lost just about everything of value while others profit off of my hard work. I will not allow others to take advantage of me like that again if I can help it.

——-

6 years ago, I separated from my son’s father because he wouldn’t help with basic house chores or caring for the property that was only in his name. I had done all of the work of setting the house up to be purchased but had no credit. He had credit because his parents had set him up with their cards when he was in high school.

We agreed that I would stay home with our son and he would work a 9 to 5. I didn’t realize that meant I would be doing literally everything and have no access to any finances except through him. I also didn’t realize that while my family and I remodeled the house that was almost condemned when we bought it, he was going to be the only deed holder.

When I left him, I had to leave everything behind aside from my basic belongings, my car, and our son. He sold the house for more than twice what we bought it for and used part of the land that he kept to build a new, expensive, high-end house next door to it. He has not and does not pay child support, and for the last 6 years, he has only come to visit his son 2 times. I have been responsible for getting my son up to Iowa for all other visits. He had another child with his current girlfriend not long after we moved.

I moved my son and me to Texas because of the weather and some of my family being located in the area we moved to. I ended up meeting a couple (we’ll call them John and Sarah) and we joined their family of 2 adults and 4 children, making a total of 8 of us. Things were rocky the first year but evened out and I thought everything was going ok.

I didn’t think much about John asking me to stay home for the first couple of years and started a small graphic design business to fill my time. This worked well because I was able to do all of the promotional work for John’s career as a musician, and began to travel with him to sell his merchandise while he played. I’ve always been very involved in music and love traveling, so it felt like a win.

Eventually, I wanted to be able to do more and pushed to get a job again, so John offered me one at a company that he worked for. It’s a good job but requires me to cold-knock people’s doors to try to pick up their cable and internet equipment (this is based on work orders sent from the company I contract with, and could be due to nonpayment or changes they’ve made to their accounts). That’s not easy if you don’t have your head about you, and there is a fair bit of danger involved. I have been attacked by dogs, had people attempt to trap me or drag me into their houses, almost been hit by cars in residential neighborhoods, and totaled my car in Austin traffic while on my way home from work. It isn’t what I’d like to be doing for the rest of my life, but it pays most of my bills most of the time.

I was committed to making it work and put all of my money into a joint account with Sarah. She and John had their own joint account, and she did all of the home finances with John checking in from time to time. I found out after a while that she would sometimes try to hide money or sneak things away. One year she spent over $3000 on weed in 6 months, without having anything in the budget for it. We found out that we were about $20,000 in debt that year and I ended up being the one that worked most of that off, working double the amount that we had agreed to. I was irritated about it and haven’t trusted her with money since, but she wouldn’t hand over the finances and John wasn’t really interested in helping me take them over. He just wanted her to do what she had agreed to do. I chose not to rock the boat and didn’t change anything.

In the spring of 2021, John was in a head-on collision on his way home from promoting a show. He died on impact. I have a lot of trauma from that. I didn’t know he was driving at the time, and I know it wasn’t my fault, but it still eats away at me that we were texting when it happened. It bothers me that I was out working my other job earlier that night instead of promoting the show with him. There isn’t anything I can do about any of that though.

Over the next few weeks, I found out that none of the precautions we had agreed to and discussed had actually been acted on. We weren’t legally married, so I had no legal standing in their family, and therefore no right to any of the life insurance funds or say in how anything went from there.

Sarah got everything, and I just had to hope that she would want to continue with me. She said over and over that she did, but her actions increasingly said otherwise. When I asked her to marry me it was an immediate no. She had ended the option of there being any sort of romantic relationship between us long ago and stood by that. I was ok with friendly roommates though, as long as we were equals. We have not been.

It started with how she was spending money. She bought a new minivan to replace the one John was driving in the accident but spent double what we had discussed. At the time I just wanted her to be happy and it didn’t seem too unreasonable, just a little irritating that it wasn’t discussed.

We had talked about moving out of the house we were renting and purchasing a property away from the neighborhood we lived in. There had been an increase in crime, and I didn’t want to drive past the spot where John died every day on my way to work. There were several properties that came up that fit all of our wants and needs and were very affordable. She said no to all of them. Instead, she decided while I was working out of town for a few weeks that she was buying a house down the road, in the same neighborhood. She did this during the peak of the housing market and paid twice what it was worth, then commenced to dump thousands of dollars into remodeling the already completely functional kitchen. The kitchen remodel cost a third of the property’s total value and now she won’t spend money on any repairs in the house because she spent too much there. It is a mobile home that has a lot of floor damage that needs to be fixed, among other things. It is also considerably smaller than the rental we lived in, which was already too small for 8 people.

In addition to these things, there has been a constant stream of Amazon packages – hundreds of dollars a month – since John passed. She has almost covered her body in tattoos during this time as well, going to very well-known and extremely expensive artists.

The real kicker is that she quit her job when John died. I have zero issues with this, but she isn’t doing anything to make money, while I work both my day job and my design job to try to keep up with the house bills. The property taxes on her house (she didn’t put me on the deed either) went up by $4000 this year. She spends most of her time laying on the couch watching TV, smoking weed, and driving her kids around. My son has to ride the bus every morning because there “isn’t room” in her mini-van for him (that’s just not true).

She did get 4 geriatric dogs with all kinds of problems that she was in no way prepared to handle and made them the rest of the house’s problem. Two of them are gone now due to extreme behavioral issues, but the house will reak of urine and feces until the carpets and rugs are all replaced. She treats the dogs better than she treats my son, and they sit in one of the seats in the minivan that doesn’t have room for him in the mornings.

At the beginning of this year, I began separating our finances. I knew things weren’t going well and I had a feeling something was coming based on the previously mentioned behaviors. Sure enough, I discovered a note she had written and left on the floor in our shared room that talked about how she hates that John left us with her. I’m sure I wasn’t supposed to see it but was supposed to see it if you catch my meaning. When I really look back, she has been passive-aggressively pushing me out the whole time I’ve known them, I just tried to overlook it because she was saying the opposite. Actions speak much louder than words though.

So here I am, paying to live at her house so that my son has a roof over his head and can finish the school year where he started it. Although at this point, if I could relocate tomorrow I’d pull him out and start the move now. Her kids want nothing to do with me and often speak very poorly of me and my son when they don’t think I can hear. I often hear her and her kids picking on my son, but they stop immediately when I enter the room, acting like I am being ridiculous or too sensitive if I call them out on it.

At this time, my son and I are living at Sarah’s during the school week and going to stay with friends or at my boyfriend’s place during the weekends. The cost of driving back and forth, combined with not having any of our own space has been a lot, both financially and mentally.

I feel irresponsible, and am embarrassed that I’ve allowed myself and my son to get into this position. I also feel taken advantage of and am mad that I was lied to about so much by so many people, for so many years. I don’t know what I was thinking, leaving a situation where I had no safety net, just to get into another with even less.

All I want to do is have a house close enough to my job that I don’t waste all of my time and money on commuting. I just want to have a home that is mine, that no one else gets to keep without me or take away from me without my permission. I want my son and me to have our own rooms. I have been trying to save money, but have just been sinking into more and more debt as Sarah’s bills have increased and inflation has skyrocketed.
I’ve had confirmed COVID 3 times just this year, in addition to dealing with grief and depression. I have been jumping through the hoops to get state assistance for months, but their communication and website are poor at best, and I have a hard time getting my mail from Sarah on a consistent basis. I found out today that I have more forms to fill out, one being confirmation of a rental agreement, which I do not have.

I need housing that allows pets, as I will not rehome or put my cats in a shelter. I’d love to be able to bring my chickens and ducks as well, but am willing to work with what I need to with that. I do regularly use my birds as a source of food.

My goal is to raise money to pull myself out of debt and find an affordable rental or be able to make a downpayment on a home as soon as possible.
None of my family is in a financial position to help me with this move, I won’t ever have any sort of inheritance coming to me. I DO have a couple of friends with land in the area that have said I can set up a mobile home on one of their properties until I’m able to purchase a plot of my own, but I do not currently own a mobile home. I do think that is a good short-term option.

So that’s what I’m trying to fund – a home for me and my son.

Thanks for reading… I appreciate anything you may have to give.

Paypal: @blasfemme86

Amazon wishlist: www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/2XXLWH8YKSK67

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: USA

Last Updated: January 8, 2023

Mum of twins in need

I am 40 and mother of 11 y.o. twins. I’m not sick or unemployed, but I struggle to make ends meet.
I have changed my job after 17 years of being a teacher for better payed job. I also tutor students and work during weekends in an adult school. However, whatever I earn is not enough to pay for bills, loan instalments, food, clothes and cost of building a house for me and my sons. I am a single mother. The father went abroad 3 years ago and has a family of his own now. He contacts the children, but it is very rarely. Also, he pays child support, but it is very little amount per child – around 100$ monthly. I cannot make it more legally, because he didn’t give me his address so I the court can’t send him the papers. I tried to reason with him, but it’s no use, he simply won’t help.
My situation is rather complicated, but long story short – Some time before I met the father of my kids I helped my friend financially. I trusted the guy so much that I took a loan in my name and he promised to pay it off. Several instalments were paid and he stopped. This way I had 10000$ in debt which I had to pay myself, when the „friend” disappeared in thin air.
Then I met the father of my children. Love of my life. But after it turned out that it would be twins, not one kid, he changed. Things got worse with time. In the meantime we decided that I will sell my flat and buy a parcel. I went to live with him in his flat. With money left we were to build a house for our family. But it turned out it would take years to complete as the father could work on the house just 2-3 hours a day, after his work. I wanted him to help me get a loan in a bank to build the house in a year or two. But he refused saying that he won’t take this debt for life. We didn’t finish the house obviously. After we split up I was on maternity leave with children, no home and lots of bills to pay and kids to feed. I had to provide for them and I got caught up by instant loan spiral. I generated a debt of 15 000$. I had no other option, had to take care of my kids. My parents took me and the kids to their home, but it was difficult to manage. When my maternity leave ended I went back to work as a teacher. I got a deal with bank and I managed to pay off some of the debt, but still it is a lot left and the instalments are killing my budget. I also rented a smal flat to live on my own, not to abuse my parents’ good will and kindness. After some time I managed to sell the parcel I owned. It let me buy an old wooden house with a garden. Some money left after the purchase so I used it to pay for major reconstruction of the house, however, it still needs reconstructing and redecorating to be habitable. To do this I need around 15 000$. The bank won’t give me another loan due to my earnings being too low. I would manage to finish it using the money I earn, but after paying bills and loan instalments and all necessary food, clothes and cost of fuel for my car I end up with nothing. Sometimes I need to ask parents for financial help.
All in all at this point I have 40 000$ in loan and the installments take almost all the money I earn. This situation makes us struggle so very much each day. We don’t live, we barely exist.
Please help us have better life. I would be grateful for any help even the smallest one.
https://www.paypal.me/SloviAnka

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: EU

Last Updated: January 6, 2023

Filed in February and still Waiting for Child Support

First, it was hard for me to decide to do this. I am a single mother of two girls. My youngest dad was who I thought would be my forever. Trouble from the start he was but I’m a lot to swallow myself with my mouth and willpower. We always bumped heads and things for some reason never seemed to just settle down. It took me two years to realize that was his intention. I tried everything to have the happy all-together family. I paid for relationship counseling for him not to show, I probably own a library on relationship books. We did daily devotionals. I even printed relationship worksheets. I loved him and was willing to try anything. I even got to the point of being submissive allowing the wrongs to be done. You see, since my daughter was a couple months old he began disappearing for a few days at a time. During this time he was unreachable and I had to wait until he popped back up to do anything about it. I was a stay-at-home mother and no license. When i ran out of diapers or formula it was either friends/family helping me out or i was packing the baby up and walking the streets of Norfolk no matter the weather to get what she needed. I would throw my fits when he got home and he would just take off again no matter how much i begged him to stay. Eventually i stopped asking him to stay knowing he would leave regardless and would beat him to the punch by telling him to go. I didnt really want him to go but in my mind at the time it lessened the blow of being left anyways and there was nothing I could do about it. Now, I am not claiming to be any saint but the amount of abuse and inhumane treatment I took from him now that I had time to realize what it was, is unbelievable that I tolerated as much as I did. I was torn if I was the cause of what he was doing to me or if he really had no right. On top of the disappearances which gradually increased from days to months, he is now on his fifth assault charge. Those also were my fault. I was a snitch. I regret it too because I believe the assault charges are what lead to the worse abuse, the mental and emotional damage. By the third assault charge I have given him more than enough right to disregard me and the kids for days and weeks. Once he felt I learned that my behavior gave him every right for his disregarding and abandoning he tried regaining his right to be physical. He mistaken my weakness for his power as it took a day of given forgiveness to be abused for me to realize calling it in was what was necessary. by this fourth one, counted as his second thanks to my lack of self confidence that I had a right to hold him accountable. I scrounged up 5000 to have a lawyer turn 3 into 1 for first offender status and a new city restarted the count and bypassed somehow the good behavior violation from another. Luck always in his corner as I scream beg plead for some understanding of the impact being done to me which impacted the children in my care. The guilt alone is something for me to battle with each new day and with each new challenge. Anyways to sum it up though I filed for child support feb. 2022 before we were even officially done. on fathers day he made his biggest disguard move by moving some girl into his grandmas with him who lost her own child and i learned from her family  was willing to spread legs for anyone who would put a roof over her head and drugs in her system. What I did not understand during this time was how she was more what he desired than the mother of his own child who made my kids a priority. It makes more sense to me now with time. I can go on and on with specifics to just how horrific an experience i been through. I did not even express the amount of emotional trauma and loss of self I cope with in my moment to moment. Nor did I mention the new developing struggles of moving forward without the random days he decided to be of some benefit few and far in-between. I’m unable to trust my own judgement, I am dealing with the change of being a loyal partner for three years to being itemized down to a sex toy now outside my relationship by majority of men approaching me. I am reserved and trying to find the love i lost for myself along the way. I am savy at making ends meet but now its been nearly a year with a third continuance before child support established and I am asking for some help so I do not bury myself in a financial hole before getting any help to come out of it. Im ashamed the responsibilities of my partner have always been on my shoulders or the blessing of family and friends choosing to support my burdens. Maybe someone who can lend me a hand without feeling a hole in there pocket would be willing to help a mom on the shit end of the stick. It would be beyond appreciated. I am not only asking for money donations. I always like hearing someone elses stories or advice or opinions on narcissist abuse. I diagnosed him myself so I’m not for certain but four books read and its the only explanation i have come across that addresses the many red flags and desensitized decisions I have encountered through this time. Thank you for reading my survival story. The ending will be phenomenal when its finished.

 

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: USA

Last Updated: January 5, 2023

Drowning and Desperate

I’m at the end of my rope and I am 100% desperate for any kind of kindness or help. I don’t know where else to turn, as I have tried everything. I tried contacting debt consolidation services, which act like they want to help, but in actuality just made me feel dumb. I have a job now, I had a better job before COVID with insurance, retirement, all that. I have a job now, but it’s nothing like what I had before. I’m trying to build my credit, but this past year has literally been one hit after another and I can’t keep up.

I have a bill in collections that I have been paying down, but I can only do $50 per month. Its about $500, and I have credit card bills that I keep making the monthly payment but then I end up having to use it to make gas purchases, or groceries. I can’t get the balance down, and 2 months ago I had to open up a new card because my cars starter went, and I needed new brakes. It was over $1,500, so now I have 3 credit cards maxed out. All that, and the car literally just died on me this weekend. So now I have nothing. I can’t even junk it because I still owe 1,200 on the car. I feel like I am being tested. I’m a person who always tries to do the right thing and I feel like I am constantly getting beat down. I have thoughts of suicide, running away, all the horrible thoughts that keep you up at night… I’m 42 and I just don’t see a light at the end of the tunnel at this point. I have 3 children. My daughter is in college, I have taken out loans that I don’t even know how I will pay back. I’m drowning in debt just trying to survive. I don’t have nice things, I live paycheck to paycheck just trying to get by. All these monthly payments make it almost impossible to save, or leave enough in my account for emergencies. Now I have the car issue. Car taxes are coming up… I don’t know what to do. On the outside I act ok, but every day I’m panicking because I don’t know what I am going to do and if this is going to be the week were everything REALLY falls apart. So here I am, begging for money. I know there are others out there in far more worse shape than I am, and I also know that if I was ever in a position to help others I would absolutely do it. But I am the one that needs help now. I need some sign of hope. If I can wipe my slate clean, I can hopefully get on track and not feel overwhelmed everyday. My daughter needed a winter coat and I had to charge it, even though I know my card was almost maxed out. I feel like I am going backwards. I don’t want these cards anymore! I got them to help build my credit, but they have become my crutch to get through hard times, and now I’m  falling apart.

I’m humbly asking for help, from strangers. I’m desperate. If you could help, even a little, you have no idea of the burden you would be helping to lift off my shoulders. I’ve included images of my CC bills, as well as my current bank account. As soon as I got paid last Friday, almost all my paycheck was gone to auto debits for bills and car insurance on a car that not longer runs. I can’t take this anymore. Thank you for taking the time to read this plea.

https://paypal.me/jrondini

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Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: USA

Last Updated: December 30, 2022

Single Mom w/ 2 girls & Guardian to schizophrenic Sister as our Mom passed away w/ Cancer.

Single Mom w/ 2 girls and mentally unstable Sister.

Hi everyone,

I don’t normally do this however this year has been very challenging as I have been on high blood pressure meds and my weight has been increasing due to the stress.

I am truly depressed and feel empty having to look forward to my paycheck and pay my bills and other obligations when all I get to see is $80 to $90 rightafter my main utilities and telecommunications companies are paid.  In addition, my stress and blood pressure has been very unpredictable due to my Schizophrenic Sister taking off for a period of 3 to 6 days and she would just find refuge in a warm place and stay there for days until the Scarborough Police would locate her and bring her home.  Since our Mother passed away with cancer 5 years ago, I have been looking after her however difficult and worse it has become.

Currently my Younger Daughter has a learning disability and has severe excema.  She has a pending root canal that requires treatment.  I also still owe $2,000 for my CERB payment which who knows when I’ll be able to pay.  Me &my kids all require reading and night prescribed glasses, When my Mom passed away, she said she wanted me to look after the whole family including my Schizophrenic half-Sister. However, i had no idea that it would involve watching their every little move, worry about where she is sleeping out there, and also worry about paying her many credit card debts which my Mom had when she was still alive and caring for Bernie.  I work part-time as a Health Receptionist earning $25/hr and my weekly net pay falls below the amount of where I want it to be as I never find myself with so much leftover.  Its always hand to mouth and the Survival Games. Also due to the inflation, this is making people such as myself stagnant with negatively and feel feelings of unworthiness.

My Father is in Windsor and is 85 yrs old and isn’t as educated as i’d prefer him to be as he unfortunately has favoratism towards both of his previous kids who are both older than me and from a previous marriage.  My Father blames and judges me for my anxiety, weight gain, stress and shows his favoratism towards his other Grandkids from both of his kids from a previous relationship before my Moms’.  He had basically shut me and my girls out of his life for nearly one decade and his two kids who are aged 56 and 52 are very happy as they are the only ones who are on his will and i am sick just thinking about this as they have brainwashed him completely especially now that he’s already 85 and almost has dementia.

Pls consider your contributions to –        paypal.me/ELovrecich

Happy new year!  Please think about me before you go to sleep tonight and hug your precious ones.

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: Canada

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