Hello Everyone-
Were should I begin. I would never in a million years ask anyone for anything. I’m the one usually always helping everyone. But I’m so depressed and don’t know what to do.  2023 has been such a hard year. Not only for myself but for a lot of people. Since the year began my whole life has turned upside down. I was hopping 2023 would be different but it wasn’t. Because of the economy going down I began to get anxiety and depression. To top it off panic attacks.
This lead me to become more depressed and  not care about anything.  It got so bad that I began to fall behind on my bills and got into debt. I also got behind on my mortgage payments.  I understand that this is all my faul, but being depressed all the time never helps.
The only thing I would like is help to get me out of this mess. I always pray to God for financial help and I feel this is one way to do it.  Thank you so much for listening to me.

Depressed Mom.

Hello and thank you for taking the time to read this.

My name is Bethany and I’m only 20. I’m begging for a total of $10,000. I have been living on my own since I was 18, and since I don’t have a college degree, I have been racking up debt for everyday expenses. Not to mention, I also have a car loan that I’m not including in this number. I left an abusive home and have been trying to make it on my own since then. It’s been very hard, but I am ambitious, and I know that if I can just get back to zero debt, I can get back on my feet again. Maybe then, I can actually have some savings for the future. I was working in a restaurant for the past year, working in harsh conditions for 50 hours a week. My bosses didn’t care about my wellbeing, they only cared about the money and their bonuses. I left that job because I was miserable. Now I work as a front desk agent. It’s easier work and pays pretty similar, but it’s still not enough to survive. I feel like I am drowning, falling deeper and deeper into debt. My car is pretty old (made in 2008), and it’s already starting to have many issues. I just hope that it doesn’t break down soon. I have big dreams like starting my own business one day, and owning a house. Before I can do any of that, I need to get my credit up and save. I really want a good future and a better life. I’m really desperate. Even a $50 would help me out to get groceries for the week. Thank you so much for anything you can provide. I owe my gratitude to anyone willing to help a stranger. I have tried working multiple jobs, working online, and doing side hustles. I’m still working everyday to try and pay this down so I can live in peace. Every day since I left my family has been a struggle. I miss them all the time, especially my younger brother. I need some help in this stage of my life, and one day I hope I can give back to others and return the favor.

Thank you all again for anything you can offer !!

Here is my paypal link:

https://paypal.me/beggingforhelppls?country.x=US&locale.x=en_US

Im anthony.

Where to start? Well i guess from the beginning of my problems.  Im 46 i went to prison when i was 24. I grew up in a crack house mom was a junkie i went through things a kid shouldnt see alot of violence. The worst was 1 day my mom was leaving us at my grandma’s so we were all outside playing and seen my mom about to leave so we all ran over to tell her by well nobody seen my baby cousin “baby james ” come around the back of the car so she backed up and ran my cousin over killing him at 2 years old that sight has never left my memory. 😢

After that i got mean i think i was like 12 but cant really remember alot about that time in my life .my family was destroyed and i ended up in prison at 24 years old.i can say that’s the closest to feeling dead that i can come without really being dead no visits no mail and no phone calls for 7.5 years. The 1 good thing about it was i changed alot about myself i try to help people  im a mechanic and I have a few customers that keep me busy. I dont usually  put my customers on a personal friend level but I  had gotten divorced Because I finally saved up enough money to buy a house.

My ex wife did not want me to buy A house is needed to be fixed up. So after weeks of complaining, I decided I would try and be a good husband.

And that would be financing your house And do what she asked and that would be fin answering a house considering I was never able to have credit because I never had a co. Signer. It would have to go in her name name…

A little that I know that would be the end of my marriage right after the house was financed. Ma’am, I paid for the downpayment with my money I had saved. And after the house was all.

Said and done and in her name under the financing. Two weeks later I got served with divorce papers

I could not believe it. I really thought that my wife loved me. But I found out very quickly she didn’t. I ended up living in a camper for about a year and one of my customers told me he had a house. I could rent. So I decided to move in there.

And I continued doing work on his Fleet of vehicles.  But there was something I just didn’t trust about him. So I made sure I started writing checks to pay my rent not long after moving in probably 6 months He started racking up big Bills. And at first he would pay them.

Then winter came and the Fleet of fire trucks broke down a lot. She ended up with a bill of $8000.  And I told him I needed the money because I couldn’t pay him in rent. Mohe kept telling me he was broke and what get it to me. This went on for quite a few months until I had enough. And I co a front of him and that Monday. He went down and vowed for eviction on me so i got a Lawyer and fought it and went on almost a year and the case was appealed. Because the judge in my town of Taylor Michigan was biased against me because the landlord had family that worked at thecord so even though it was appealed to go downtown, the judge decided to sign the writ and have me thrown out of my house.

Since I’ve been home from prison and 2010.  I have worked pretty much non-stop and I had a garage full of tools and equipment and a house that I know had to figure out what to do with it was sitting on the side of the road Well, I run at storage. One of my customers felt bad and let me use her garage to do some work. Out of that’s where I’m currently at and. I even met a girl.

So now to current  Winners here and I’ve gotten the flow.

I have not been able to pay my customer any money for her garage lately. My storage is a couple months behind and next month. They will option it off if I do not pay on top of all that. My girlfriend got a blood infection.  And end up with endocarditin, her heart and it went subject. So she is currently in the hospital on life Support I’m broke And as we all know, the bills don’t stop.

I finally established credit and now that is all my stuff. Because I have not been able to make my payments. If I don’t figure something out fast. I will be losing my storage with  a lot of my property. Stop I don’t know what to do I don’t have anybody. I can borrow money from. I don’t have any family. And I don’t have anywhere to go. My customer wants me to be out of her garage the beginning of next month after the New Year. I’m in a bad spot in my life. I don’t know how to fix this. Or I’ll say I don’t have the funds to fix this. And it seems like it doesn’t matter how much I work. I just can’t make another money to fix this problem. Everything is so expensive now. I wish I was blessed enough to have someone. Help me and purchase a house and let me pay them. So I can own a house. So that’s the majority of my story.

And it’s gonna take a lot of money to get my life right now

I’ll be happy with some help. So I don’t lose my storage.. I have a car that I am building from one of my customers. And I should be done in a couple months. And hopefully I will have the money to get a house that I can rent with that money but that doesn’t help my situation of having to be out of this garage at the first of the year because then I have no airplane in my equipment or my property or my customer’s car. Feels like the walls are caving in on me.

My beautiful girlfriend Doesn’t even look like herself. They already did one heart surgery. And she has to have a second one to replace a heart valve. Her name is LaRen  please prey for her .and if anybody decides to help me i thank you very much my PAYPAL info @ANTHONY KNAGGS

Carbonesmechanics@gmail.com

 

Hello, to whomever may be reading this, I appreciate you for taking the time to. Let me start out by saying that I have been working since the age of 19. I have spent 25 years in a foodservice warehouse. I am very good at my job, it has given me a great life which up until now, I couldn’t have been more proud of.

Since may of this year, my size and years of working, have caught up with me. I was place on short term disability through my regular doctor, and was getting treatment up until August. In August, after my flma ran out, my health insurance was taken away. I then had to wait for a letter from my employer, that had information in regards to purchasing an outside insurance policy. Well that seemed easy enough, which I ended up doing, not until the first of October. It took a long while to recieve the information, and also to find an insurance rate that I who now, is on disability benefits.

So now it’s the first week of August, the last time I seen my doctor due to the lack of insurance. Here’s where something I didn’t expect to happen, well happened. I was informed by my short term disability insurance company, mutual of Omaha, that I was terminated from my employer that first week of August. I was shocked needless to say, but luckily after doing some digging and getting a hold of people who can look into it for me, that that was just not true.

So all the whole from August through the end end of October, I wasn’t receiving any benefits. I had to basically wait until my employer fixed the situation, informing mutual of Omaha that my termination wasn’t true. Also, since mutual of Omaha closed my claim, I had to reapply for disability. Here’s the problem, I was still in that waiting period for insurance, and also had no income to even pay for a policy.

Come October I finally Recieved what was owed to me those couple of months ago. In the meantime I had to dig into my savings account, and run up some credit cards. This of course took its toll on my credit score, which I worked really hard to improve upon.

So now, my current situation is I was supposed to be put on long term disability, which would provide me with funds to get my policy going again, or at least to see my doctor’s again, even out of pocket.

I just found out today though that I cannot claim disability because mutual of Omaha says that they Recieved a letter from my doctor’s office stating that I was released to work at the end of November.

I was floored, like why wasn’t I aware of this? Why isn’t my job calling me wondering where I am? And most importantly, how can I be released from care when care just hasn’t happened?

As a side note, should have mentioned before, but I have several vertebrae that need tended too, and I have a herniated disc. I also have avascular necrosis of both hips. I’m 6″10″ and 330lbs, so I think my career choice just caught up with me.

So now currently I have a mother in assisted living, she has been diagnosed with dementia and alzheimer’s. Her care is very important to me, and hospice has taken over this past week or so. I also live with two elderly dogs who can no longer walk, they are 16 and 15 years of age. I know it’s time to make this decision that I really don’t want to make, but I know their quality of life is slipping away. If I had the funds to do so, I would give them peace.

My short term disability ran out Last month, and now since I am supposed to go back to work, even in the same condition, I don’t honestly know what or where I’m heading.

Since I’ve had some time away from work, and my dog’s spend a lot of time sleeping, I took up a new hobby. A new interest over the past few months. I have been making props for Halloween, making signs to hang for other times of the year, like Thanksgiving and Christmas. I’ve been doing dioramas too which I have found to be quite relaxing. I have gotten a lot of positive words sent my way from friends and family members, when I post a new project on social media they seem to gather a bit of attention.

Well I thought that I would list my items for sale, I figure I might as well make a little money on the side. We’ll unfortunately, aside from a couple of special orders, I haven’t had much success. Still have my motivation though! I believe it’s a good way to express myself.

So I guess lastly, I’m just looking for a financial boost. Just something to get me through the waiting on doctors appointments, papers to be filed, insurance claims to be sent out….I’m currently behind on my December bills. I am a homeowner, it’s me here with my poor old dogs. If I had some money to just toss in the bank to cover my expenses, I would be very grateful! Even if there was some to throw at my new hobby, which I did open an etsy store for, but again not much action. I am planning to attend some art fairs and markets next year around me locally. The best way to advertise is to show off what you offer in person. Pictures just don’t do justice, that old saying.

I am confident that everything will end up working out for me, but again in the meantime, I just would ask humbly, for some help while again, things get put into place. If I need to go into a long term permanent disability, then that’s fine, but my bills just can’t wait.

Thanks again for any and all whom have read my story. I’m an honest person I always put others before me, but now it’s me that is needy and I just don’t know for sure how to help myself. Sounds ridiculous I know, but I did spend a lot of time taking care of my mother before hospice took over. Glad they did, and glad she is in good hands.

 

There is no way to put into words how I feel, but I’m going to try and ask for your help ! I have 6 kids and 2 grandchildren, my husband has always worked to keep us happy and this past 2 years we have almost went all the way down hill with bill and cars … let me explain my husband is in construction and a 1099 worker so that should help you see the bigger picture we also have horrible credit, work was good now it’s not so much, we have a car and truck both are broke down and we have no way to get him to work to make money to fix it, the electricity bill is OUTRAGEOUS I mean 900.00 a month and we can barely pay the payment arrangements to keep the lights on , 3 kids at home one works but can’t help with much, the other helps on the farm and the other is not working because she doesn’t have a car or the child care to do so at the moment. This is long and sparatic  I know but I’ve never been good at writing or asking for anything!! I’m tired of being the fall guy for everyone even though that’s usually what moms are, the sponge to absorb all the energy but I’m tired I have debilitating migraines and I’m close to losing my mind not just because of the holidays but because how am I ever gonna get a leg up to stand again… I’m not sure and this is the last  straw so here I am again I posted before a few days or maybe a week ago and realized I haven’t explained much but both post should let a little light in as to the struggle!! Please just read it!! Anyway I’m not sure what it’s worth to anyone…

im asking for 10,000 but will take whatever to help the taxes are due the electricity is due

thanks for reading!
@enchantress1329

 

Hello, my name is Roshetta. I’m in need of some financial support. Recently, I lost my job after taking a few weeks to deal with health issues. On top of that, work has slowed down for my husband at his job. We are now late on December rent, which an eviction was filed on Dec 10th. We are behind on gas $285.06 & phone $402. 12. I have reached out to different organizations for help, but so far, nothing has come through. We have two vehicles, but our family truck has put us down and will cost a bit over $500 to get back going. Which I hope is really soon. Since I have to get around, that leaves me taking my husband to work, who gets up at 4:30 am faithfully 5 days a week 10-12 hours a day. Food is high. Some days, I have to go get free groceries from pantries. Keeping gas in the car is crazy seems like I’m filling up every day. All my kids need new clothes and shoes they have outgrown everything they were blessed to get last year, and this year, I just don’t have the extra. I buy little pieces here and there depending on who need what the most. It has been a struggle trying to determine what bills get paid now and how to split the cost of everything else with what’s left. We do try to Tithe like we are supposed to, and I know it’s has to get better. That should be at the top of the list I know. I ask the Lord to forgive me. I’m trying to take what little I have and turn it into more than enough. I am sick of this struggle. My job is to help others, and I try to give anyone anything I can. I’m not just asking for help for this one situation. I am asking for help to get out of this situation for life. I hope for generational wealth for my kids. I don’t want them to ever have to struggle. My whole life has been one. My husband was the same. We literally come from nothing. The fact is we have dreams and goals. We just never had the guidance or knowledge on how to make it happen. My husband wants to drive for himself, so we are trying to get his business up and going so he can better provide for his family. I want to start a family business and also get back to doing the only thing I have always been good at doing. Hair. I am a hair braider. I have been braiding for years. It is really good money in what I do. It’s just hard starting over. Last year we were living in a hotel. We moved to our place in April this year 2023, so we are still new to the area, so I have to build clientele. I’m not just someone asking for money. I want help setting up business so I can create the wealth to take care of my family without worries and also be a help to others in need. This brings me to my non-profit organization that I have future plans for. Living in a hotel with a family of six was definitely an experience for us, and I have a desire to help families like us.

If there is anyone willing to help, we gratefully appreciate whatever your heart desires, even if it’s just resources.

paypal.me/Roshettay or $wavedpolke cashapp

Hello, my name is Elijah Eggleston. My late mother took out a credit card in my name without my knowledge. She passed away with a $3400 balance still due. I hired a lawyer to deal with the situation and they took my money and did virtually nothing. I was later sued for the debt, and the lawyer failed to appear in court, leaving me with a judgment for the debt. I was told by a number of folks that after several years it will simply be irrelevant to my credit score, which sounded ideal because this is not truly my debt to pay. But now my apartment building is being renovated and I have only a few months to move. So now I am in a hurry to rent with horrible credit. I urgently need now to wipe this debt off of my report to increase my chances of approval. I will be doing my best to make consistent payments towards it regularly, but some support of course would make a bigger impact on my report. Below are images of my mothers death certificate, as well as a documentation of the judgment. Although they cannot be directly correlated to each other on paper, I hope these images would provide some convincing proof. I wholeheartedly appreciate any help I can get. Happy Holidays.

 

https://imgur.com/a/3NH3i5g

 

https://paypal.me/Eggleston94?country.x=US&locale.x=en_US

 

Dear Reader,

I hope this message finds you well. You imagine me speaking right now if I were talking to you I’m not one of sadness I’m not discouraged I’m not depressed. I’m very hopeful and I’m very motivated. I do have to mention that this is a challenging chapter of my life and yes I am here to ask for assistance for my family’s well-being.

I am a divorced single mom, currently working from home and pursuing my education while caring for my two daughters, one of whom has faced significant health challenges due to mold exposure in our previous living situation. After losing our home, my daughter underwent major medical procedures, including the removal of her thyroid, and is now dealing with immune deficiency issues. Besides healthcare coverage I am not on any government assistance and work hard to feed my daughters hearty meals and I cannot believe how much food cost has shot through the roof.

Our current living situation is far from ideal, and I am compelled to make a change for the well-being of my children. Living with family whom smoke in the bedroom and it was miracle to get that. I don’t have to tell you the effects of 2nd hand smoke on a weak immune system.  I find myself basically covering all the bills and when I have managed to put back 300-500, It is certain that the mortgage and power bill go unpaid. It’s not my mortgage, but we live here. , let me just clear something up. I am a person who seriously is driven and has extreme amount of faith in herself. OK I’ve been through a lot, but I also worked really hard and I work harder than most people I have ever worked with and I’m not saying That to boast, I’m saying that because I will never give up I have an inner drive and determination that is it’s beyond me and I’m thankful for that so I know that I can get us out of here. I don’t know what it is that’s keeping me in some kind of funk. Trying to keep me trapped but I’m predicting this before it happens and seeing and observing the actual reality of it, and that leads me to more faith in myself because now I I’ve learned different things to make me start doing things are actually gonna get me somewhere instead of things that are not getting me anywhere, so this is not a waste.

I  have worked with a mortgage company and have been diligently working my credit and get it suitable for long term home finance. I have explored various avenues, including owner financing, and daily watching the real estate market looking at properties and I have a good plan to purchase a home under 100k and then add in for complete rehab if necessary. I just need help getting a down payment. I’m going to school right now for medical billing and coding. I don’t know how but it cost me $18,000 8k of which are student. I’m graduating in March and I actually enjoy and have learned medical bill coding. I like the actual task of it and the therapeutic communication that’s involved in the healthcare industry itself.

I am reaching out with humility, seeking assistance to raise funds for a down payment on a home where my children can thrive without health risks but also I’m am fighting hard to help preserve the innocence of  my two actual angels. not only poor air quality but smoking, Negative attitudes, bad influxes on my teens. I am committed to paying it forward once we are in a stable position.

Any support you can provide, whether it’s financial or guidance on available resources, would be immensely appreciated. I am determined to create a safe and nurturing environment for my family, and your assistance would make a significant impact on our journey towards stability.

Thank you for taking the time to read my plea. I am grateful for any support you can offer.

Warm regards, Crystle

PayPal.me/crystledove

 

I have been married for 33 years tats more than half my life to a man who I deeply loved with all my heart.            I knew the day we met I was going to marry him someday.                                                                                    Without saying a word to me he just walked out. I had no idea there was anything wrong with our marriage or that he wanted out of it.                                                            I haven’t seen or heard from him in months until he shows up one day and wants me to take a ride with him so we can talk.                                                                              Not one word has been said the whole time we have been driving around and then “Bang” I’m dizzy and my head hurts a little bit.                                                               I think we are in a car wreck I turn to see if he was alright just in time to see him punch me in the face and before I could say a word he punches me in the face again and he keeps punching me and I hear my nose break, the blood is just pouring out and I an feel my teeth coming through my bottom lip.

I can’t see anything because both my eyes are swollen shut but he keeps punching me so I covered my eyes with my arm and he is still trying to punch me in the face but my arm is taking all the blows until it breaks he pulls over puts me on the sidewalk and leaves me there.   He Never Said A Word The Whole Entire Time.

I still don’t know why he beat me like that.  In all the years we were married he never hit me before. I just don’t understand why now.

If that wasn’t bad enough he then broke into my storage unit, everything I owned was in there and just like that 61 years of my life was gone he took everything.

I couldn’t afford rent and had to move in with a relative. I live in the basement of their house.                                      I have no sink no stove no running water & no heat but I’m very grateful to have a roof over my head.

 I’m barley making ends meet now that I have maxed my credit cards out & my only income is from social security disability.

I have tried to save a little money each month but it never works out I end up having to spend it just to get by.

You see I have a 12-year-old grandson who has been kicked out of school more then he has attended.

He hasn’t done any school work so far this year and he has already been kicked off the school bus for good this year.                                                                                               My grandson isn’t a problem child or a bad kid either. He is Autistic who has violent meltdowns where he throws & breaks things or threatens people or hurts himself.

When this happens at school it’s triggered by being bullied or teased. He is treated like he is a bad kid (not a child with Autism)so he is sent to the office and his dad is called from work to pick him up.

He is either kicked out for the rest of the day or kicked  out the rest of the week depending on whether it’s his only meltdown that week or not.

He needs a positive stable structured schedule and the online home school education for Autistic children and that’s something his school isn’t set up for and can’t provide for him.

All the school wants from my grandson is to sit still and to be quiet.

That’s why I’m on my hands and knees begging you good people for donations in the amount of $200,000 to purchase a house that will bring us all together (we live about a hour away from each other) so that my son & I can work together on getting & giving my grandson the online home school education for Autistic children he so deserves.  Hopefully in time my grandson can be self sufficient and provide for himself

This will also ease the stress and frustration and anxiety that my son goes through everyday being a single parent trying to raise a child with Autism and this will give my son the peace of mind  knowing that he won’t have to leave in the middle of his shift or be losing anymore money off his pay check.

This house is 20 minutes outside of town and is completely fenced and gated to keep a unwanted husband out and a 12 year old Autistic boy in.

This house will give me a safe place to live the rest of my life that I can call home where my grandson can play & explore and just be a happy boy & where my son has a smile on his face as he is watching his son grow & be happy.

Thank you so much !    paypal.me/TComer500

 

 

 

[Read more…]

I remember there was a time when I was a child playing at a playground and my hands slipped when I was on the monkey bars. I fell onto the bars below me, on my diaphragm, which knocked the air out of me so hard, there was an initial high-pitched whistle and silence, but I remember I was still trying to scream out in pain. It was like I was hit so hard by the fall that it knocked a very long and extended pause out of me. By the time I could breathe in and scream again, my eyes saw white haze. I remember this because life has just hit me that hard and I am stunned because I would consider myself adept at being able to roll with the punches.

In my family, I am the black sheep. I color outside of the lines and seek to live my life to the beat of my own drum. That can be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on your point of view. Even being the black sheep, I am also the only one in my family that has put myself through school. I am not talking about graduating with a certificate or an associate degree, I hold an MS from a school that is private and selective. I did this while fighting custody disputes over my children and have always found the fortitude to rely on that strength from within because I knew I was alone. It has been apparent that my family seeks to keep me in a position of conforming with their religious beliefs, as a means to indoctrinate me to become a doormat for them to walk upon, so we no longer have a relationship. With that said, while I was hanging on by the skin of my teeth and life came at me with a knockout combo, I have no one to call.

Pre-pandemic, I was employed in the oil and gas industry and worked as a landman. As we all know that industry has changed since. I then began seeking a deeper understanding within my spirituality, which is a source of serious contention with some of my family. Being a very logical and analytical person, I had never afforded myself the opportunity to explore any artistic side, but I did so and I do love the ways in which I feel a sense of peace and fulfillment. Slowly over the last year, I now know the humility of being what is called, “a starving artist.” While waiting for my newly created art business to take root, I began Doordashing to make ends meet. Then life would seek to come along and throw some wrenches into the cogs of life and I had a slew of car repairs to make over the summer.

Due to a lack of funds, I began making the repairs to my vehicle on paydays, spending my free time turning wrenches and this went on for three months. My job at the time was hybrid, with me needing to be in the office two days a week. An Uber one way was $37, which I couldn’t spare because I needed the money for the car repairs. I experienced my first termination from employment in August. Mid September, my car was back on track and I began hitting the streets with my dog, Oskar, and we were back to Doordashing and feeding homeless people with orders that were cancelled. Even though it isn’t as glamourous as working in an office reading contracts all day, I love being able to find someone who thinks they are all alone in the world and sharing in a sense of compassion.

It was around November 11^th that I left home to Doordash in a city around two and a half hours away for a few days. I was behind on my rent and had heard from some other Dashers that it was a profitable trip for them, when they had worked there previously, so Oskar and I packed up, fed the cat and made sure she would be comfortable for a few days while we were gone. It was nice to get out of our area and see what else was going on in the world. I was driving an order to a customer, when my engine made a popping noise and flames were shooting out from under the hood. Smoke started filling the cabin of the car and Oskar started coughing. I quickly pulled into a parking lot and was mortified that my engine was on fire. Luckily, the fire department came out and was able to put the flames out, but I no longer had a car, or a way to make money, plus I was two and a half hours away from my home. I have mainly worked remotely since 2016, so when I moved to this state in 2018, I haven’t been able to meet very many people I can call friends.

Oskar and I lived in the shell of the car for around three weeks, in a church parking lot. It wasn’t until the end of the second week that one lady from the church came to check on us, but I was thankful that they left us in peace while I tried to figure out what to do. This was over the Thanksgiving holiday as well. I haven’t spoken to my father since Father’s day, but he called me the day after Thanksgiving and I told him about my car catching on fire and that I was homeless. His response was, “oh wow. Ok kid, well, it was nice talking to ya.” I knew that would be the response from anyone that I should be able to rely upon. I then received the emails that I was being evicted from my apartment. Trying not to think of all of my things that I wouldn’t see again, the pictures of my life that hold the good times were gone, but I was also certain my cat died and I didn’t know if I should just look for a job and try to pick up and start again or not.

In an effort to get through, I have to put my emotions on the back burner because you have to get to it to get through it. I had reached out to a lady that I had met that seemed friendly and helpful to see if she could find the time to talk with me and to see if she could help me figure out how to get a shower because I hadn’t had one in over two weeks by that point. I was treated like I was pariah and she mentioned that she didn’t want her daughter to catch a disease because her daughter had a weak immune system. Sometimes, when I am able to talk to someone, I can figure out the answers I need, when they just listen. It seems most people are only concerned with themselves or seek to interrupt this process by telling me how I should feel or telling me how I should act or react. This is probably why I am quite and keep to myself. Live and let live they say and I agree, which is why I have a dog to talk to I guess.

I was finally able to find someone that I had known around three years back. Even though we hadn’t spoken in years, they came to get me and took me to a friend’s house where I am now a resident on the couch. Being homeless is a very humbling experience. Instead of hating and being filled with disdain at how ugly humans can be, I have chosen to love them harder because forgiveness is for me, so I can move past it and it isn’t for them. Forgiveness is something they need to do for themselves. I think about all the times I was hard hearted and I am thankful for the experience to instill in me a greater sense of compassion and a new found appreciation for hot water and a couch cushion. I also have a greater understanding of who I am and that love, compassion and gratitude truly are the strongest of all emotions that can see a person through anything life throws.

Now, that it has been a month since I left my house and I have lost everything that I own, I can finally let the emotions go a bit. Knowing that my cat is gone is the worst. Knowing that I wasn’t there to comfort her for all the times she had been there for me will probably tear me up for a long time to come. That has been devastating, which is the only word I can think to use to even come close to describing how horrific it feels. I also know I cannot finance a vehicle, because my credit has also tanked since 2020, right along with my income and upon calling some dealerships, they don’t finance Doordashers. After spending countless hours over the last week, the only people seeking to hire me are ones that want contract labor for 100% commission, which isn’t assisting me with being able to attempt to get my belongings back from the company that owns the apartments I have been evicted from, nor obtaining a vehicle, so I can pay my phone bill. Plus, it is going to be damn near impossible to rent again in this state with an eviction tied to my name, so it looks like I need to find a different state to call home.

I haven’t found it within myself to panhandle yet, as I do believe that one should be of service. However, it also feels that this is panhandling with technology and I don’t know what I can do to be of service to you for any monetary compassion you may extend toward my debacle, but I can only hope that I could be of service in one method or another. With that, I think I will bring this to a close. Thank you for reading this portion of my healing process, but it has been very painful to share, but letting it out does help a bit. Thank you again.

https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=KXRZUB94JW2TS

Cashapp: $plutonian1111