Hello,

My name is Lindsey and I am 38 years old.  I am writing this because I am looking for some help.  I am currently homeless and on the streets in Santa Ana.  I am super depressed and have been trying to get off the streets for some time now.  I have been through a lot in my life and I am so tired of being taken advantage of, being told I’m scum, getting robbed, stereotyped, degraded and put down all because I don’t have a home to go too.  I lost custody of my 2 kids and I can’t seem to forgive myself for this.  They are healthy and with family, but I still have this guilt that pushes me to want to get high to numb the pain!  This is what my life has succumb too because of stupid decisions I made almost 14 years ago!!  I have reached out to certain people and have just had the door shut on me.  It’s super discouraging to have everyone turn their back on you because I don’t have a place to live and no job.  I know that I have done this to myself and I accept full responsibility for my actions, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t reach out for help.  I’m struggling.  I don’t know what to do.  I just want to take a shower and wash my hair!!!  Is that too much?  I’m not a bad person and I still look decent, but inside 8 am dying and crying scared.  You can’t cry while living on the streets!  I need to find a motel to crash at for a bit because if I don’t, I’m going to lose it.  I have a dog that needs my full attention and I’m running low on food for her as well.  I would be lucky to eat food myself everyday, but my pup comes first and I make sure she’s well fed.  I am a good person, I am just lost and am asking for some help!!!!  The last 2 nights have been the coldest and it’s only getting colder!  I’m already feeling sick.  I’m just asking for help with a place for me and my dog.  To shower and eat and be warm and finally get some sleep.  I’m sleep deprived because you don’t get to sleep on the streets.  I’m a mess to be honest.  If you can find a way to help me, I really am truly appreciative and grateful.  Please don’t look at me as some freak or disgusting homeless girl.  I am a person looking for guidance.  Please help me and my dog stay warm and I need to eat.  I can’t take this anymore.  I’m losing hope!!;

paypal.me/lindsdawg1503

Hello and thank you for choosing to read my request. It is really a long story, and it breaks my heart every single time I tell it. I would like to say, before I go any further, I am not asking for something for nothing. I am 50 years old, mother of 3 and grandmother of 3. I’m a college student studying for my Associates of Science in Business Administration Degree and fully intend on acquiring a Bachelor’s Degree with a concentration in Entrepreneurship. I am capable of a better quality of life, but I have found myself in a situation that affects many members of my family and there is a time limit that has put pressure on me in a way I am not prepared for

In short, I lost 2 job, my car and apartment while caring for my elderly father. His needs were demanding and his disposition was foul, nonetheless, this is what you do for your loved ones, so  I moved in to care for him around the clock. I watched as he struggled to stay positive. He was trapped in a deteriorating body, losing his dignity, his hope for a future, his desire to go on. He was fearful of dying in a nursing home and he sobbed and pleaded with me to promise to let him die at home. I promised and he was so grateful. He played with our 3 kittens and I saw joy in his heart and the smile returned. Then he began to weaken and his attitude toward me changed. He was cruel, degrading me and blaming me until finally, he slammed a loaded pistol in my lap and told me to kill him. In a panic I ran. I returned the next day and found that he had severely injured himself. There was blood throughout the house. It was his feet. on foot had a bone sticking out. The other was deformed. He was crying and finally agreed to go to the hospital. His friend took him.

Less than 24 hours later,  I was told my father was having many toes amputated and his kidneys failed. I was immediately evicted with my kittens and nothing more. No clothes, groceries, vehicle, job, phone, home or father. His friend said that my father gave him power of attorney and he would be selling our family farm, home and everything in it to pay for his residency at a nursing home. In shock, disbelief, heartbroken, angry, paralyzed with confusion and sadness, I spent the next 3 days reading everything I could about the law, Power of Attorney, sound mind, family law. I searched for documentation and talked to multiple law enforcement agencies and lawyers. I don’t know if I’m on the right path or if I’m doing the right thing at all, but I want answers. That is my father. The farm is my home. My heritage is within the walls of our house. My father had me promise to keep him home and now there may not be a home at all.

I got a text from my dad telling me I was an embarrassment and a failure. I’ve made mistakes, but I’ve accepted consequences and gained wisdom from it. I don’t think my dad really feels that way, but if he does, that ugly perception of me is his image to live with (perhaps not for very long it would appear). I’m not a failure. I’m not a quitter and I will not stop until I find out what is happening to my Daddy. This is not what he wanted.

As of today, my two teens and I are sleeping on the floor of my sister’s very tiny two bedroom trailer. Her landlord said that if we don’t leave within the next few days that she will be in violation of her lease and is at risk for eviction. I have no other relatives or friends that are willing to take me in and the shelter is currently full. We are in a rural area outside the city. It is too far to walk, there is no public transportation this far out of the city and without money, I can’t pay for Uber or a cab or even pitch in for gas. Times being what they are, money is the only thing that matters.

To summarize, I was unlawfully evicted by someone who supposedly now speaks for my father and is in control of every part of his estate. My father is dying, without family and alone. I’m in the process of finding out if the things that have happened over the past 10 days is really what my father wants or if he is being manipulated. I’m trying to find a home for my children and me, a vehicle, a job, and keep my grades up. In the midst of all of this, I am also trying to care for three of the sweetest kittens in the world and replace our belongings all the way down to our toothbrushes. This downward spiral started 10 days ago when my father grabbed a gun. I don’t know how much time he has left because he will not return my calls. My sister’s home is at risk and time is running out.

I ask, with all the humility I can muster, for a hotel room for my 2 children and me for at least a month, but two would be better. I’m exhausted and if I want to save my family, I have to alleviate one of the biggest issues…we need a safe place. I don’t want my children to think that caring for others would have negative results like this did. I don’t regret it, but I don’t want to expose my kids to any more negative situations. They need to be teenagers. They do not need to be burdened with worrying with me. I need to rest my mind and my body so that I can continue seeking help for my father while looking for a job, car and home. I should have my income tax in the next 3 or 4 weeks, and I fully intend on being employed again soon. If I am in the city, at least I have a fighting chance at getting a job or two and we can utilize the amenities provided to the public like transit, food bank, workforce, etc.

I do not give up. I don’t want to let my children think that “begging” is the answer either. I want them to understand that help is there for those who need it but are still continuing to work for better things. I want them to understand that you don’t give up on family even if it appears they have turned on you. We don’t have answers and I will not stop until we do. In the meantime, I must be gentle with myself and I need to rest. I talk myself back into the light but it is getting harder everyday…yet I keep going. I cry when no one is looking…but it I fear without rest and a hint of security for a couple of months that I may slip and I may break. I’m only one woman. I am exhausted and I am so scared I can barely breathe. If you can help, please consider me. My family is depending on me and unfortunately it doesn’t seem to be in my stars to be the hero this week. I pray that time doesn’t run out before I do.

I know things will get better in time. With your help, things could start to turn around. Sometimes, it just takes one good thing to get the ball rolling. Thank you for sticking with me and reading my story. Blessings to you.

Lainie Marie

 

https://www.paypal.me/lainiemaries

My story is I’m a husband and father of 5 beautiful children and 4 just as beautiful pets. For 10 years now I have been working in the gasoline field. I am a driver under DOT strict rules and guidelines. I have had an unexpected injury at work which resulted in shattering bones in two of my fingers in my right hand . In my line of work I am no longer allowed or capable to work at this time. One I can no longer firmly hold steering wheel with both of my hands which would not be safe while hauling 9000 gallons of gasoline. I’m looking at 8 weeks out. As well looking at pins and surgery. Iv never had to beg or ask for money Iv always worked hard for what I have. I am scared of losing all Iv worked for as well as roof over my children head. Please consider and thank you 🙏 god bless

PayPal.me/kennethdeimler

 

 

My girls and I need a chance

My girls and I need HOPE.

So, every which way I turn I hit nothing but dead end roads and brick walls. My youngest has been saying the past few weeks how she wants her own bedroom. A HOME with a real kitchen. It kills me inside, it hurts.. I am a self taught, strong independent woman. After having my twins Genesis and Caroline who are now 4yrs old, I have had trouble getting back into steady work. Reliable income. I also have a 10ur old daughter Ellanore as well. She is so smart and I am so proud of her. She has never had it easy. As much as I try to shield her away from bad and hurt. She was abused when she was 3 by a close family member. Shortly after her father died at 4yrs old. By time she was 6 I was now pregnant with twins, not able to work anymore, depending on a man who was the best actor I have ever met. Ever since I allowed him into our lives all he has done is being me down and anything to hurt me physically and mentally. I have lost 3 homes bc of him. He put me in debt with Xfinity. He has broken into home and robbed me andy girls of our rent money and every electronic thing he could grab. He has stolen my car, had me arrested on false accusations 3 separate times. I finally was breaking free from him. Getting my girls and I away from him and his abuse. After 2 yrs of living in a hotel, FINALLY MOVING INTO PUR OWN HOME! A TOWNHOUSE in Pennsylvania. Our move in date was 1-20-22. 12-21-21 I allowed the twins to go with him till after the new year, that way I could pack and start moving our lives 5 hrs away. As agreed on 1-02-22, I came back to pick the twins up. He has other things in mind. As soon as I arrived he started yelling and screaming and then the hitting followed right behind. I grabbed my girls as fast as I could not knowing he was on the phone with the police. Needless to say, I was soon arrested and sent to jail under false accusations of second degree burglary sitting on 12,000 cash bail. THERE WENT OUR HOME!! I SAT IN JAIL TILL MARCH 2,2022 BECAUSE OF HIM. BECAUSE WE LOST THE HOME WE HAD WAITED AO LONG FOR! We were so heartbroken and still are. Since then we can barley afford the hotels on a weekly basis. Somehow I have managed this far. Along with paying storage fees. I am constantly looking for work and the next job I can make more money. The next gig I can do. Nothing that is getting us further in life. For the past few years I have had this goal/dream to start up my own Mobile Detailing Business. With this, I would have another opportunity to get away and be free. I could afford a lawyer to defend us on court against him when I can take him. (Which I have been documenting everything since I was let free)

 

So I have slowly started collecting items I would need to successfully do the jobs I would be hired on for. Only a few more things I need. I need a trailer. I would use my Honda Odyssey to pull the trailer till I able to purchase a work truck to use for the business. I them would need to purchase a water tank. I already have a gas powered pressure washer and an electric pressure washer too. I have all the towels and rags possibly needed and scrub brushes. I need all the products to clean and wax and shine. The most important thing of all would to aquire my license first before doing any job. This way, with starting up this mobil detailing business, I would have a reliable income for my girls and be able to provide so much more. They deserve it. They deserve to have a place to call home. They deserve to have somewhere they know is their home and not worry Bout leaving to some place else. My girls would be there learning from me and watching. Learning how to be strong independent woman. This wouldn’t be the end. Starting this company would only be the beginning of much more goals and dreams I have.

 

I have never asked for help. This was quiet a pill to swallow. Always want to do things on my own because I know I am quiet capable. Lately, I just don’t understand. We need a fresh start somewhere new. I have no family, no friends. So we wouldn’t be leaving anything behind but bad memories. Even as a child myself growing up in new Castle. Life was hard. I have raised my self since 5. Mom would leave home while going to work all day. My father used to abuse me an also tried to kill me. Would have, if he wasn’t put away for murdering his apparent boyfriend. After that my mother’s boyfriends were not any better. They would abuse me andy sister as well. My mother was always worried about dying alone and would blame us for them leaving her. Didn’t matter the abuse we took from them. Or the uncles that touches us, having to fend for ourselves at 5. At 16 I was kicked out the house and been on my own since then. I haven’t been able to create a stable home. I have failed so far. One thing I have not failed and WILL NOT is being the best mother I can be. Everything I went thru as a child prepared me to be the mother I am today. Over protective. I always miss them and tell them how much I love them. Most importantly, men is not something I bring into their lives. I refuse to allow that. I refuse to take the chance of bringing them around my girls in trusting them with the safety of my girls unlike my mother…

 

My whole point… I know I am rambling on, but my point is, I just need the chance. I need the help to start something up to change our lives. We have no one. So here I am reaching out. I pray, God I pray someone reaches out. Help us out in anyway. We would be so grateful.

 

Please…

 

A. Magner

 

paypal.me/ellagenecare36