2017 was treating me pretty good until this summer. I was working for a company for 2 years, received a promotion to restaurant manager, moved into a new apartment, and then everything fell apart. In July, I was diagnosed with pancreatitis and needed to have surgery to remove my gall bladder. I was medically taken out of work for 2 weeks at a time that I needed to be there, and when I returned I was let go. At the time, I was told that I was not performing the functions of my job, but later was confided by a friend that my boss blamed me for his mistake. I was fired with no previous warnings, and in fact made to sign a verbal, written and termination warning all at the same time. I applied for Unemployment Benefits and was granted them, but I had an overpayment on file of $3000 from 15 years ago. I tried to plead with my state that I had no income at all, but was told that any benefit I was to receive had to go to the overpayment first. I lived for three months eating from food banks, dumpsters, and soup kitchens. Also during those three months, I did not have the ability to pay rent or my monthly bills. I was still trying to pay my security deposit when I was let go from my job. It is now the end of December. I am one month in on going to school for my MBA, and I just had the gall bladder surgery on December 18th. Things have been starting to look brighter, but I am still in so much debt with my landlord, and monthly bills that I need to pay to continue my education online. If I were able to raise $5000.00 to help me succeed I would be lifted out of the hole I am in. I feel like I can see over the top of that hole at times and then life seems to kick me back down into it. I thank you for your time and anything you can provide. paypal.me/SGray34
I been through a lot. I don’t know what to do. I prayed and am scared at the same time. Alot people don’t know my history or know what I been though. I just got a job, that is paying well but not able to get paid till the 12th of January. I am two months behind in rent. I lost my job in October and never told anyone. I am about to be homeless owning only 800.00. My rent was only 450 staying with a friend. The job I have is great opportunity for me to get back on my feet. No one really knows me. I was in prison for a year and thought I would never make it. I made some decisions that I wish I could have done better. I just wish I had someone to talk to without being scared of people who would judge me. I am scared that I would be on the streets in a few days, because I have until the first. The people I live with gave me two months to pay. Honestly, I don’t know where to turn and I am trying to put my faith in God. He honest got me this far in my life. I almost died in prison because I had a bowel up structured and no one believed me. They thought I was faking, I was rushed to the hospital 3 days later. I knew then it was an angel that was watching over me.I am just venting because I am trying not to lose my faith. I need help . I just need a 1,200 and I will be alright if anyone can help me.
My name is Lena and I am 20 years old. I am born in Serbia. In June 2017 I got a scholarship at the Radboud University to study Arts&Culture Sciences, but only for one year, the academic year of 2017-2018. The tuition fee for the next year will be 7000 euros and my biggest dream of studying for the entire Bachelor in Holland might not be realised if I don’t manage to find extra funding. My family is not able to help me because they are living of only 300 euros a month in Serbia. I myself will be able to earn some amount of money working during the summer, but that will be enough to cover for my living expenses for the academic year of 2018-2019. That will be enough because I will be sharing a room with my sister, so I won’t have to pay the rent. Unfortunately, the money I will make in the summer will not be enough for the tuition fee.
Why it is important for me to study in Holland and not in Serbia?
I’ve become close to my half-sister in Holland and have been visiting her for the last four years. She has studied History and told me all about the universities in Holland and their method of teaching and research. I have seen that it’s nothing like in Serbia. In this year, I have seen what the Dutch university has meant to me and my mind. The courses are designed in the way to activate the student and I’ve become responsible for what I am learning. Unlike in Serbia, where students are taught to listen and reproduce facts, which leaves them in a passive role. I’ve noticed that I’m starting to use my full potential. At my current University we have to hand in minimal of two papers every week, which has activated me fully and I don’t want to loose that next year. My average grade is a 7,5 and this is above average. I would love it if you could help me out with funding my second year of the Arts&Culture Bachelor!!!
As a young girl I have been very ambitious and always a big dreamer. Serbia does not offer me the chance to develop myself fully and Holland does. I will be incredibly happy if I can finish my education in Holland!!! :)
I won’t go into too many details about my upbringing and my subsequent adulthood, what I would like to say is that everything has been difficult from the get-go. To be honest, life has not been dreadfully difficult, but there has been very little joy in it. Days turn into weeks and weeks turn into years of monotonous struggling just to Simply scrape by and to Live Another Day. There are many deserving people in this world and my circumstances are not dire enough to be placed ahead of those who are in Greater need. However, I often see people blowing money on items that will just give them a few moments of enjoyment, perhaps an extended weekend, but that same sum would totally change my life. Because I live day today and paycheck-to-paycheck I have never really been able to get ahead. I take on loans to deal with car repairs, assisting family, or whatever is pressing at the time. I’ve been spend great amounts of time and resources trying to pay down those loans. So basically my plea is that if anybody intends to buy some frivolous item that would just simply hang on a wall or sit glass enclosure, I ask that you take that sum of money and bestow it on to me. What this will do is allow me to actually live life, to get some of the fruitage of joy that a man of modest means could have. I don’t want much, but I would like to try to get myself into a home and be able to pay my bills on time and finally not have looming debt and obligation at every turn. So if anyone out there wishes they had someone who could benefit from an inheritance or just a well-wisher who wants to give somebody who is a decent person an appreciated a leg up in life, I cannot even begin to tell you how grateful I would be.
Hi to all that may be reading this. My young son and I have had more than our fair share of disappointments, health problems and family deaths…now it’s time for me to step up, get a grip and make our lives full of laughter.
I am a middle aged mum who is ready to fulfill her dream of becoming the best driving instructor around. This dream has been stored at the back of my mind for many many years because until now, it was an impossible dream, but with your help, I can finally make it a reality.
Even though I work full time (in one of the worst jobs possible), I can now fit the training in around this. I have saved to buy all the necessary books and equipment needed to revise but need your help to pay the training fees. I have researched many companies and for the one that suits me to be able to look after my son, train and work at the same time costs £5000.
I bring smiles into my life everyday whilst I work and when I am at home but these are not TRUE smiles, I smile so everyone thinks I am ok, I would love to smile but with the added happiness of knowing that everything was really ok.
A TRUE smile of knowing I was providing properly for my son.
A TRUE smile of knowing I could treat him now and again.
A TRUE smile of knowing our lives were going to get easier.
I know I am asking for a lot, if not a miracle, but any donation however small would help me to begin this dream.
Thank you so much for taking time to read this.
Yours Sincerely ……. Mother and Son.
To make any donation……
Hello. My name is Ratholoana Marole. I’m a 27 year old citizen of the country Lesotho in the southern African region. I am a sole breadwinner in my family in which I live with my parents who are jobless. I at times work temporarily at small intern jobs. But currently I’m unemployed. I wrote this letter to you because I need a donation of $4600. This amount will cover my educational bills and debts that I will disclose in this letter. With its help, I can return to school and complete my final year of my Degree in Secondary Science Education. My parents have been unemployed since 2010. So I have had to take over the family finances since then through very little funding that I received from a restaurant job that I had. The job lasted from 2010 to 2016 when the restaurant closed down due to low cash flow because a mall was constructed in its neighborhood. Ever since the closure, I have struggled to live and go to school due to lack of funding. In response to that, I borrowed money from a friend who is not our country citizen. So at the moment he wants to go home, but I still owe him the $3600. He is demanding his money and thinks that I’m now an obstruction for his departure. He has to go to his home country Zambia using the funds that I owe him. If I fail to pay him by the end of February 2018, I’ll go to jail because I have nowhere to take that amount of money. So helping me pay him will be the best thing to happen for the both of us. The donation asked for is $4600. I have so far talked about only $3600. The remaining $1000 is going to help me get back to school by paying my tuition and accommodation fees. I will see where I will get my food and a few academic books. Helping me with those two will be my dream come true. I know that is a lot of money, but it’s worth asking for because my life depends on it. If I complete my education, I promise to support my family and help others like you will have helped me during this time of need. I’m deeply humbled by the chance that you have given me. Thank you in advance! Yours faithfully Ratholoana Marole PayPal information email@example.com
My name is Madison Kaye and i’m 17 years old. A year ago I quit school and had to begin supporting my family of 5 to make ends meet and to hel0 pay bills, rent, etc. My father is a disabled man who broke his back in 1998. My mother lost her job last year due to harassment and anxiety/depression issues. My brother is disabled and is currently dealing with depression issues and my 9 year old dog has multiple problems along with epilepsy, pneumonia, and inflamed and swollen paws. Her medicine is far too expensive and we’re on the verge of losing her. Rent is piling up and bills aren’t getting paid. This is my last option and I don’t want anyone to take pity on me, but to help. I know my mother and father and my entire family would appreciate it if anyone helped us out. We’ve always helped out others but never had anyone help us in return. We need close to 1,000$ for everything and after trying foodstamps, welfare, rental assistance etc nothing has worked, we’ve been denied everything. I can’t take much more pressure on keeping this family afloat and if anyone could please help us, I would be forever grateful. This would mean everything to us and I thank anyone who is reading this right now and to anyone who donates. This is our last hope. Much love, the Kaye family. ♡
Donate here: paypal.me/madquinn
I am 51 years disabled I have diabetes and Aspergers Syndrome and everything has been a struggle for me my whole life. I spent my whole life living with family and helping them out. I have done the best I could and everyone in my family has made me so dependent on them that I had to get help to get away from them and get out on my own.
I have tried different jobs in my life but nothing seems to work out. I am trying to find a job where I can work at home and make some extra money. I get SSDI but it’s not enough to help pay for my other bills after paying for the rent on my apartment. I take survey and do some odd jobs for some extra cash but it’s not enough to pay for my bills either. My bills are stating to pile up. I have been out on my own for over a year because I couldn’t deal with my family controlling my every move and sticking there nose in my finances. My whole life they have made decisions for me and it has only made my life all that much harder. I will not go to them for help. They will only control my whole life again. I was and am getting along okay with out them I am just having some financial trouble right now. I am looking to get around $2,500 to $3,000 to help me out with bill and other living expenses. Anything anyone can give will be of a big help.
Hello everyone, My name is Danielle Tatum; I’m twenty-one years of age, and currently am enrolled at Liberty University an Online School. The degree I will be pursuing will be : Bachelors of Science: Law and Policy ( Pre-Law ). Now some of y’all may want to know what draws me to Law. What made me pursue this career? What are my goals with this educational path? Maybe even what Career I’m planning on obtaining. Well it all started in my last year of High School. I was currently taking and Law Enforcement 1 classed taught by Officer Mosley. My passion went toward Law in that class, but it excelled on one particular week. The week we learned about the West Memphis Three Case. The case involved three young men who were falsely accused of Murder based on their looks and what they listened too. This case in particular basically said that they were guilty until proven innocent. They were sentenced by a court of law guilty in which two of them got life in prison, and one got death. It took them seventeen years of tortuous failed appeals until they could walk away free men, but it came with a price. They had to sign a plea that basically stated that they could walk away ‘ claiming ‘ their innocence, but the state of Arkansas could still say their guilty and that they could not sue. All of this behind faulty police work and stereotyping. So my goal is to become a defence attorney so that I could help with as much of my power to help people that can’t help themselves. To help fade away the stereotypical opinions in society and get the truth; because in law its suppose to be Innocent until proven Guilty not the other way around. So please help me get on my Journey and get my educational needs behind me. So I can better not only myself but also help those in need.
The amount I need for tuition is $100,000
I’m a 28 year old disabled man. I have had spinal issues some caused at birth the other half due to an accident. I had my first spinal surgery at 17 to correct kyphosis (155 degree curve in the spine) I was fused from T3-L1. After that I returned to a fairly normal life there where always some things I couldn’t do that others my age could but I was happy. Finished a trade school and became a medical coder but it was hard to find work, so I took a job working on the docks. Around July I had an accident fell from 2.5 story’s and landed on a curb shattering my L3 vertebrae. Working a dead end job at the time I went to the ER with no insurance and I was told no worries it will heal itself we just need to stay ahead of the pain for awhile. A few months passed and I was allowed back to work but my employer felt I was I liability and I was let go. It all turned out for the best I started working in the field I spent so much time being certified for. Flash two years later As I climbed the ladder and made more money took a better paying job with a higher title I had a pain that wouldn’t go away. My primary refused to believe it was due to the accident and said it had to be my gallbladder since it can mimic back pain and I had acid reflux and some pain located near the gall bladder as well. So after every test imaginable I had it removed only to find that was no help. Finally I saw a specialist who in my first appointment found the issue the damage from my accident that was left untreated had grown the vertebrae (L3) had slowly started to break apart I lost a lot of the bone mass in it. We tried every avenue from physical therapy medications everything but none of them helped. Now I would need another surgery extending my fusion from T3-L1 to T3-L5 which I had done in August. While on leave the company I work for had all there secrets and lies exposed the government fined them millions shortly after they shut them down I lost all my coverage and my disability plan told me due to this being a preexisting condition they would not cover anything. I spent the next two years fighting for SSDI which back problems is the hardest case apparently since so many people lie. I finally won but my credit was destroyed I had to sell most all of my possessions but I was able to pay back all those who helped me in my time of need with my back pay check. Granted it left me living check to check enough to pay bills and get by but no more no less but at the end of the day it felt good to know I was able to repay the kindness the people in my life had shown me. Another year had passed and the pain was still just growing; at this point I was in pain management trying to reduce the pain enough to live somewhat of a normal life. Being a chronic pain patient you learn you will never be pain free but there are medicines that can at least lower the pain enough to give you back some part of a life. A week before thanksgiving I met with my surgeon to go over my new imaging that was done and I was told that two more vertebrae had fractured the hardware had come loose and the rods had snapped which meant another operation. This now my third spinal operation I am now fused from T3-S1 with two cages and all new hardware and rods. I’m only two weeks out my washer dies and my dryer which is older and has been on its last leg continues to have issues. Due to the amount of hardware in my back I am not able to bend which means I have to buy front load machines or I would not be able to get my laundry from one unit to the next. With it being the new year money is already tight I have a lot of dr apts and a lot of copays which means I have no extra money to fix the problem I’m facing currently not to mention the outrageous prices for a washer and dryer even at scratch and dent shops or refurbished shops. With worrying about healing and doing everything the drs tell me to do the last thing I need is to worry about not have clean clothes worst of it all due to the surgery I cannot travel unless nessisary for a couple months or drive which make the laundromats not possible at the moment.
My reason for requesting help is to replace my washer and dryer. I know this may seem trivial to so many but to me it’s just one more thing making my life difficult. I wish I had family or someone to turn to but it’s just me. Without help It will take me forever to be able to save enough to afford a new set which means wearing dirty clothes and having to depend on anyone who is willing to help by picking up my laundry (literally carrying since I have an 8 pound weight restriction for 6 months) and be willing to help me do it hoping they have a machine of their own since adding the cost of going to the laundry Matt weekly is too expensive. My biggest concern wearing dirty clothes against my surgical incision can cause an infection. Which could lead to another operation or other complications.
If I am able to receive any help at all even the smallest donations can add up and it would go a long way in alleviating some of the stress in my life. So I can go back to focusing on healing. I have never really done this before I’ve always been self sufficient so it’s not all that easy to publicly tell my story or my failure to make my life work but I’ve come to realize everyone goes through dark or hard times and we all need a little help now and then. Between the chronic pain and the added pain of surgery life is already a struggle making everything down to the littlest task difficult. It would mean the world to me to receive any help after everything else in my life has already become a challenge. Thank you so much for taking the time to read my story I wish you the best and a happy new year!
My name is Scott and I’m 44 years old. In July of 2017 I was fired from my job without any notice, which I was later told by co-workers that were still with the company, was due to my boss blaming me for his mistake. He was shortly let go for a different mistake he made and had no else to blame. One week before being fired I was diagnosed with pancreatitis due to gall stones. On Dec. 18th, 2017 I had my gall bladder removed, but now need another surgery to fix my ulnar nerve in my left hand. I had broken my wrist in 3 places in 2014 and had to have a metal plate and screws put into my wrist. One or more screws is now aggravating my ulnar nerve and the last two fingers on my left hand are numb and I am losing strength in that hand. I have not been able to fully pay my rent in 5 months, nor any of my monthly bills in that time. I am looking to be able to get $5000.00 in help with rent. My rent is $1000.00 a month, and my landlord has been patient with me, but is now having to start the eviction process. My monthly bills are my phone and electric. My phone service was disconnected about 3 months ago due to non-payment and my electric is due to be cut off within a month for the same reason. I feel horrible having to ask for help, as I have always been proud of being able to support my life on my own. I have prayed everyday, sometimes several times a day to have a ladder and let me see over the edge of the hole I’m in, and although my faith is strong, it’s only been keeping my head above water and I feel about to drown. I have anxiety issues and depression caused over my financial situation and I come to anyone reading this as a last resort. If you have taken time out of your day to read this, thank you so very much and I hope you can say a prayer for me to find hope. If you are willing and able to help me, again I thank you and it’s something that can’t be said enough. I am in desperate need of $5000.00 in rent, and $300.00 for my utilities. My PayPal link is: paypal.me/SGray34
God Bless and have a great day! Thank you!!!!
Dear everyone please please please help me. I just graduated from college in May, got a “big girl” job as a probation officer, literally found out that our entire system of justice is the most unfair, disgusting thing that profits off of people’s misery. I quit very impulsively without finding another job, but I’ve found one now. However, I need to pay my rent of 450, my phone of 100, my STUDENT LOAN of 218, and my car payment of 200 this month. And this is my bank account. dear god please somebody help me I am beyond desperate.
Wishing all a very Happy Holiday Season & A Healthy, Happy, and Prosperous New Year.
Something unimaginable is about to happen to my family. Two weeks ago, our landlord took us to Eviction Court, and we lost! We filed a Paupers Appeal with the Eviction Court, which the court approved. One of the stipulations of filing a Paupers Appeal is that we are required to pay one months to the court for two reasons. The first reason is to keep our Paupers Appeal active within the court system. The second reason is that if this “Rental Deposit” is not paid into the court by the end of business on the provided day, the landlord can go directly to the initial presiding Judge and ask for a writ of eviction, which the Judge will order and sign that day.
Our time to make this “Rental Deposit” with the eviction court was up today at 4:30pm! My wife and I were able to come up with $725.00 as of now. We need to come up with $1,100.00 for the “Rental Deposit”, which means we are $375.00 short of the court mandated Paupers Appeal Rental Deposit/Bond.
This $375.00 is the amount of money we need to raise by 9:00 am Thursday, December 28th.
If we are not able to raise the $375.00 by morning, we may actually be forced out of our home by the sheriff on Friday, 12/29. As you have already probably guessed, we will be homeless as we do not have another place to live.
Information regarding my family and myself is warranted at this time. My wife, who will be turning 50 in February, is disabled due to numerous serious health issues which include multiple heart attacks, other circulatory issues including the need for angioplasty & stents in her neck, around her heart as well as for both legs. In addition she has had numerous strokes, which has caused some long term mental issues such as speech issues, short term memory loss, and an overall lack of self confidence as a consequence. All of these medical issues have caused another issue as well, depression. My wife has other, critical, medical problems as well, which I would prefer to keep private, for my wife’s benefit.
We have a 13 year old daughter as well. My daughter seems to be intelligent on many fronts – while also exhibiting a lack of common sense far to often. She is in 8th grade and her last report card included straight A’s, with the exception of a single B.
Myself, well things have been much better for me and my family than they have been for the past decade. We were doing barely better than surviving until Hurricane Harvey hit the Houston area at the beginning of September. I was working out of state prior to the arrival of Harvey, and requested that I be allowed to fly home to be with my family prior to Harvey’s arrival. I was told that, “you can go home to be with your family during the hurricane, but you need to be back here by Tuesday.” Well the airports in Houston were closed so I could not get out on Tuesday, additionally, I could not leave my little neighborhood due to severe flooding until late Wednesday evening. I lost my job, but I did the right thing – for the right reasons, so I do not regret my choice to be with my family as Harvey wrought its strength and damages upon the Houston area.
It took nearly a month before I was able to find another job, where I am still employed. Unfortunately, this job has a limit of 40 hours, no OT allowed, but just as important – it only pays $10.00 per hour. There have been many weeks where I was not even allowed to work 40 hours a few of these were limited to under 30 hours per week.
With the low rate of pay and the limited number of hours available, I have not been able to afford to pay all of our monthly bills, including our rent. We were able to get rental assistance in October in the amount of $650.00 from 3 different local organizations, a Godsend! In November, we were able to find another source of rental assistance for the entire amount of November’s rent, $1,100.00. Actually, our landlord told this organization that the rent was $1,800.00, which the organization paid. We provided them a copy of our lease, which showed the amount of rent due every month at $1,100. Our landlord told this organization that we owed late fees, in the amount of $700.00. The organizations response was that they do not pay late fees, both orally (my wife and I were in the office during this phone call) as well as within an agreement that the landlord was required to sign in order for this organization to provide any funds to our landlord, which she signed and returned via email the next morning.
Well, as our landlord agreed that this organization does not pay late fees, what happened to the $700.00 overpayment? Our landlord applied it to our late fees. To make matters worse, during our eviction proceedings the presiding judge said on the record that the landlord’s application of these funds to our late payments was acceptable to him/the court. As we live in Texas, a landlord friendly state, the judges agreement to the application of funds to late fees may seem proper and right. While I am not a lawyer, landlords are only allowed to seek payments for rent only in eviction court, any other existing financial issues between the landlord and tenant must be dealt with in a different court, at a different proceeding, which includes late fees.
In addition to these points, our landlord has not provided us with a receipt of rent paid, or a copy of our rental account, since October 5th.
The structure regarding late fees in our lease states that rent is due on the 16th, if it is not paid by that date, a $50 Late Fee is assessed at that time. In addition, for each and every day that follows without the rent being paid, a daily late charge of $5.00 is added. It is impossible for us to owe $700.00 in late fees, as prior to 9/16/17, we actually had overpaid our rent in the amount of $10.00. We have petitioned to court to make our landlord provide us all receipts as well as a complete accounting of our rental account to prove that the the late fees were overcharged, as well as the issue that they never should have been allowed due to the existing oral and written agreements between our landlord and this rental assistance agency, or approved by the presiding judge on the record.
We have valid and legal grounds to fight and overturn the eviction, but we have dire and urgent needs to raise $375.00 by morning.
Please help us stay in our home.
I have been living on Faith since Harvey, and it has been tough.
Please help my family by doing something I have been struggling to do, namely providing for them. This reality is extremely difficult for me to deal with, but things that do not kill us only make us stronger!
My paypal account information is paypal.me/txjbx
Any and everything is a Godsend should you choose to help us.
Should you decide not to assist us, we still stand by the opening sentence, “Wishing all a very Happy Holiday Season & A Healthy, Happy, and Prosperous New Year.”
Hello everybody who reads this.
my story is…
I’m a 30 year old man who has grown up in a hard kind of life
I’m not saying that my life was bad but what I’m saying is that I come from a big family and I was youngest one in it , I’m sure most of you who are reading this would understand how much that really stinks. so basically I’ve had a hard life growing up because my folks didn’t spend much time with my and my brother’s and sister’s didn’t either. I grew up pretty being alone and because of that I have had depression my whole life I was always the punching bag in my home, my mother and father didn’t teach me anything about life so for the past 15 plus years i have been pretty much living on a hustle. (not selling drugs) but doing odd jobs because I’ve always had a hard time holding down a job. so doing odd jobs was the only way i was able to get by and get the things that i wanted to get that my mom and dad didn’t care about getting me.
the reason I’m on here asking for help is because i had a big snag with money because this has been the worst year of my life i went to through a really bad break-up with the woman i was with for 7 years i had surgery for a tumor in my breast (yes i am a guy, and yes guys get it to) so i was out of work for 3 months, and i had not been able to recover money wise I’ve been trying to bring down my debt the best way i could but i have been working temp jobs for the past few month with only anywhere between two weeks or 30 days of work and I’m just looking to start 2018 with a fresh start i want to go back and finish my schooling and trying open my own computer shop, with great prices because i really would love to help low income people who can’t go to the top name stores to get help
I’m asking for $6,220 just so that i maybe able to pay off all my debt and get a clean start.
thank you all for taking the time to reading this
I’m going to use the name mask as i shouldn’t give any personal information out.
My name is Mask i’m 23 and in serious financial hardship.
I’m up to my head in bills rent/food/gass/electric.
I’m responsible for my little brother and just want to give him the life he deserves.
I’m working part time about 20 hours per week and it just don’t cover the cost of living.
I’m only 23 and i have learned a life lesson.
I started gambling at a young age and it grew into a huge problem. i have gambled my life away and its so hard to get out of the hole i’m in. i lost everything i ever had to gambling. i realised i had a problem when i hit rock bottom and had less than 0.30c to my name with loads of bills on my head. I stopped gambling but i’m still in a deep hole. i owe about 20,000 euro from my dark gambling past online/bookmakers/poker you name it i done it.
I wake up every day after taking hours to fall asleep worrying about how i’m going to survive the next day. Life is so hard when all you feel is guilt and depressed all the time. At the time of writing this message on this site i found online because i need to find a way out i cant keep feeling like this everyday. The pressure of owing 20,000 euro and having no money to pay it off and working part time that hardly pays the bills.
I really don’t know what to do i’m at the end of the rope and no idea how i’m going to go on. How i feel everyday going to sleep not wanting to wake up to face the horrible life i have made for myself.
I realise i caused this and its all my fault. I took the steps needed to make sure i wont ever gamble again. I’ve blocked myself from every online gambling website i know. I got barred from every bookies around my area so even if i ramble in they will tell me to leave. i did this by request as i knew i needed to stop.
I’ve taken it too far and i need a way out i cant go on like this. I found out something i could never understand and its a horrible subject to talk about. But i understand why people kill themselves.
It clicks in their heads they know they are not happy and the just cant stand feeling how they feel everyday. Its so sad because i lost 4 friends to suicide and couldn’t understand how they felt until now.
i dont even know if anyone will read this but i need help ill never gamble again i just need to be free i need my life back i want to be happy but i cant while this hangs over me.
My live long dream is to help people in need and after being true this experience when i get out of it im going to find people in need like me and help them because that will make me so happy to know i have helped someone who cant help themselves.
It doesn’t have to be someone with a gambling problem it can be anything but i just want to help people to be happy and show them help is out there.
I understand 20,000 is a lot of money and to ask people to donate to a known gambler is crazy but I swear i’m never gambling again. i learned my lesson and i pay for it every day in pain and suffering