A little insight. My sons and I moved in with my parents in 2001. My youngest son was still in school and my oldest had just started working. My oldest son quickly found a job and moved in with a houseful of friends.
My dad was diagnosed with COPD and was needing more care than my mom could give him. My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in 2005 the year my dad died. I stayed with my mom to help her out. My youngest was finishing high school. I spent the next few years working part time, helping with the bills. Things were good, bills were paid, everything rolled along.
In 2006 my moms health was deteriorating. Physically she was OK, but mentally it was obvious she was slipping further into the disease. It was also the year the business my son worked for closed their stores across the country. He had no job, and he decided to move back home until he found another job. It wasn’t long after he moved back in that he told me he wasn’t feeling well, but wouldn’t tell me what was wrong. It didn’t take much time and I ended up taking him to the emergency room. The pain had become intolerable. Testicular cancer it was. I needed to stop working, even part time. I had a mom with Alzheimer’s, a son with cancer, and another son living at home. I became the full time care giver for my family. Money was tight with only one income, but we managed. A year later, after chemo, medications, radiation etc. my sons cancer was gone. Thank God! He went back to work.The next few years were smooth, money was still tight, but we made it work
In 2012 my youngest decided the Navy would be his career, and it ended up being a good fit. He met a lovely girl who happened to be stationed on the same base. They got married in 2016. My DIL found out she was pregnant, and went Navy Reserve that same year. She moved back to her home town to be closer to her family, and my son was sent to Bahrain. At the end of the year she had a beautiful baby girl. The Navy was great and got my son home for her birth.
Spring of 2017 my DIL and granddaughter moved in with me. It was nice having extra help with my mom, and wonderful having my granddaughter here. My mom had become an empty shell mentally and physically. She was now confined to a wheelchair, no longer knew anyone, or where she was. In the fall the decision was made to out her in a hospice facility. She hadn’t slept more than a few minutes at a time for three days, and I was right next to her. I was tired and she needed medication for a UTI, regular pain killers and sedatives to keep her comfortable. We got her room ready for her to come back home. My oldest stayed home from work to help me get her room set up for when she came home. I came back from the hospice facility after getting her settled, and my son and I stood on the porch discussing the next step. He left to go bowling with friends. Little did I know, that would be the last time I would see him alive. On his way home he collapsed in his car and veered off the road. There was no accident, no trauma. The coroner discovered he had the heart of an 80 year old. The chemo he had years earlier had probably caused the damage. It was devastating for me. That isn’t the natural order of life, a child shouldn’t leave the world before the parent. Two days later my mom passed away.
Very soon after youngest moved to his next duty station stateside, and of course my DIL and granddaughter moved with him. I was a bit panicked I was in the house alone and had no job. Luckily insurance and some saving kept me paying the bills while I looked for work. Finding a job was an issue. It’s hard to find a job being 60, not in the working field for ten years, and somewhat disabled by spondylolisthesis. With no job, the pandemic hit. I basically ran out of money to pay the mortgage. It was OK there was a mortgage moratorium. I paid when I could.
Pandemic over, I was lucky found a job quickly and went to work for a company in Senior Care. I was now taking care of chronically, and terminally ill seniors. In 2022 I was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer. Surgery, radiation and medication has so far kept me cancer free. More time off and less income again.
Tried to get the mortgage taken care of through a modification, but what they wanted was more than I could do. Looked for someone to help, refinance or negotiate with the lender, something to get me out of a behind mortgage. Found someone that had no complaints, no bad reviews etc. I trusted them, but shouldn’t have. They took me for some money and did nothing. I was then desperate with a looming foreclosure. Quickly put an end to that relationship and I found another company that came with a recommendation that had no problem helping me get refinanced. Started the process then found out damage the company that scammed me made. I guess I was stupid, naive, or desperate when finding the first company. Foreclosure looming and no way to stop it.
My home has very recently been purchased by a company that flips houses. I would like to make them an offer to buy it back. My father built it in the 60’s and it has been our family home since then.
It is a big ask, but if I could get my home back with a good offer to them, it would be grand. It is possible that my DIL, granddaughter and grandson may need to move back in with me if my sons current deployment is extended. At this point I am not sure where I am going to go if I have to move. I don’t qualify to buy another home, and not sure with my ruined credit I could even rent an apartment. I am needing about $350,000. It is an over the top ask, but I am always hopeful.
Thank you and God Bless!
paypal.me/phh917
“You can’t wait until life isn’t hard anymore until you decide to be happy.” ~Nightbirde