I am the proud wife of an amazing man and mother of 3 of the most incredible kids you could ever meet. Yes I am quite biased, they are my life’s work. Things have always been a little hard for us. My husband spent years working for this family and it has effected his health. So in 2020 I took over the financial responsibilities. And then COVID hit.
To fully understand Ill have to take you back a bit. In 2018, I was working in my garage on the farm and scratched my arm on a nail. I cleaned it up, because its a farm. And went back to work. An hour later my arm was really hurting. I went to the ER they gave me meds and sent me home. A few hours later I went back and the next thing I know I’m waking up in another hospital in another city with my arm all strapped up with a sponge protruding from an open wound that went from my collar bone all the way to my wrist. I should have died that day. Flesh eating bacteria has a 27% survival rate. I was among that 27%. I could have lost my arm, but didn’t. I went through 12 surgeries and the scar remains. I cant get a job because of it. One look at my broken wing and I’m done. And the government doesn’t feel I deserve disability for it. Not even partial.
Later on in 2018, my step father, of whom we were very close too, passed away. His body was riddled in cancer. His son (step brother) and his wife (step sister) had a car accident a few months later and she was killed instantly. In 2019 my father in law passed away in the same manor of my step father. 2020, COVID hits, I am happy to say that we lost no one to COVID. Yet we still lost. My mother was a very healthy woman. She had issues, like RA and high blood pressure. She took Humira for 12 years. She was told she might have 10 years before it stopped working. February she bought her very first brand new car, and in April she passed away in her sleep from heart disease (myocardiopathy) exasperated by the Humira. It was a complete shock. I had to do a lot of damage control for my kids, before I could even mourn. My adult autistic daughter had just moved in with her 2 weeks before. Now my daughters autism is very low on the spectrum. She’s smart and quite functional, in fact she has a great job in the baker of a local grocery store and she decorates beautifully! Her biggest issues are social, finding her grandmother was devastating. And then 2 months later my best friend that I have known since Junior high passed away in his sleep. So much in so little time and I still haven’t mourned.
So at this point we have many deaths and many legal issues. My father in law had left his estate to a partner but his will was not signed. My husband has 2 sisters, which made the goal find and split everything. And for the most part, I have done that. Needless to say, that was a lawyer bill. Then there is my mothers estate, another lawyer. She left everything to my children but the executor and his wife, who also sold my mother her house and was her boss of 30 years (my boss of 5 years), tried to take the house away and sell it, or rather buy it. See I used to be his office manager. He owns a handful of companies and I kept books for them all. He flips houses with his little businesses. I worked along side my mother for 5 years. Another thing that I don’t want to overlook here. I am an only child. My parents divorced when I was 4 years old. I am 52 today. Its always been my mom and I against the world. I’m sure you can imagine my situation was rough. I kept my cool for my family.
Of course, our losses were not done. In 2021 my mother in law passed. I was thankful that my husband had a sister, she was helpful through losing my mother and of course as my mother in law was taking her last breaths I promised to take care of them all. Its just what I do, its what my momma did and her Momma before her. I made big promises to both our mothers, and I have all but made good on them. I was even blessed to officiate their funeral ceremonies. I became ordained because I am in love with love, I never intended to do funerals, but it is exactly what I was meant to do.
After all this loss, meaning loss of lives and unwanted gain, gain of estate. I was awarded some pretty big shoes to fill. I had to find my husband and his siblings inheritance, sell 2 houses, ready a house in one city for sale and then a 2.5 acre farm in another city. The farm was ours but when my mother passed I moved into her home knowing what her boss was trying to do way before she passed. My mothers will was influenced by her boss and his wife. In 2015 he drew up a will and she signed it. She was leaving everything to my kids, but it was all suppose to be sold and split in 3. My kids don’t want their house sold. But I knew what I was doing about it was the right thing. We had 3 court appearances, The first one was on Zoom and it was the first anniversary of her passing. The second was my birthday, at the court house, we walk up on a car that looked exactly like one my mother had and it was pure white inside and out and on the bumper there was a Monarch butterfly. A real butterfly. My Momma had 1 tattoo, it represented me, her only child. Yes, it was a butterfly. The third and final, my husbands birthday. And we won. Momma is my angel now i know it. But, all these problems were really cutting into what little inheritance my husband had so far. My mothers things remain for her grandchildren just as she wanted it. My final statement to the court and her boss.. “My mothers things are not for sale.”
You would think at this point we would have been relieved, and yes we were, but not enough to bring my full platter back to full plate status. I started to dip into finding the inheritance and realized it was so over my head I was drowning. At that point we had just about exhausted our savings and the revenue on the farm was going fast with all the legal fees, and of course COVID. And we didn’t care all that much because we knew we had saved my mothers house, and my husbands inheritance.
I call this karma. My father in laws partner passed about a year after him. And with my father in laws help she did manage to steal 75% of it. Thankfully a chunk of that was from the grand parents and they couldn’t keep it. And then after the partner passed, somehow she was able to keep a vehicle we didn’t know about, and it was still in my father in laws name. Her daughter had to give that back… that was yet another lawyer. I sold the car, and that money went straight to a lawyer to help us find what was left of Mineral Rights in the Permian Basin. Wonderful news!! My husband needed this, as his COVID amplified weak health has forced him to retire. I took over.
I educated myself, and it took a minute, but I did find them all, I made really good decisions. I did sell a bit to help us catch up on bills, but I also kept a lot. And managed a helpful monthly revenue. Of course in this economy I already know that its not enough. And until they start drilling again its gradually decreasing. But it does pay bills and I have a feeling it will get better after the first of the year, its security and I really don’t want to sell it. Before this AC issue happened I had a very good plan, I had even started putting back into our savings to get the insurance asap. I’ve opened and EBAY store and its starting to take off. I have various side jobs I can fall back on to supplement. And the plan would have worked otherwise. But then life happens. Finally some forward movement in life, we even had our first grandchild in the middle of all this.
I can say with much certainty, I am so very tired at this point. Trying to find this, trying to give my husband the retirement he deserves, even if its early. Trying to help My oldest and his wife who we have finally gotten into remission again with her lupus. So much so she is finally starting to phase out of the meds so she can have her first child. My youngest son gave us a beautiful baby girl and my daughter who has had to fight for her identity through all of this with autism, is in a much better place with a job she loves and a partner that loves her. My kids are all grown, but I will always take care of them first, and me last. That’s what they deserve.
So here’s my problem…. aside from not being able to afford house insurance this year (which would have fixed this easily and it really scares me that we don’t have it), I need a new ac unit.
My outside ac unit is about 8 years older than my inside unit. I need to replace it because it uses R22 Freon which is not manufactured any more and the left overs are scarce. I have found a really good company to take care of us. They have worked the problem from top to bottom. My husband and I have no real income so we cant even cosign on a finance agreement. My daughter lives with us so we applied in her name since its also on the house with her brothers.. They will only cover a small portion. Ok, I can appreciate that, but.. The full bill is close to $16,000 and they are only offering $4800. So the repair company says they can finance the rest with a $1500 deposit. But we will still owe close to $3000. So that’s a payment, its small but its a payment. Then the finance company is another payment. Two payments with only 1 job and 1 small royalties check a month. The electricity is already spiking because of the window units we are using. This house is in great shape. But we need insurance, new windows, new kitchen appliances and a new fence. All this i was saving for, now on hold because of a small mistake my mother made when she replaced the ac 7 years ago. She only had them change the inside unit. Right now I am currently searching for anyone that might have R22 freon to at least give me a little time to scrape up the money. I’m not feeling very confident about it though.
Texas summers are very harsh. 100 degree weather for weeks, not days. I have to keep my home comfortable and safe because my grand daughter spends 3 days a week and every other weekend with us. I’m so worried that time will be missed with her if we don’t get this fixed the right way. I’ve been working so hard to keep up this house so that my children wont have to deal with what i have been dealing with since 2019.
I really don’t want to finance this, I don’t think we can afford it. My Momma wanted new windows and a new fence and I know I’m not going to be able to do that now. Even if we do get help from someone what we had is gone and what we have isn’t enough. As helpful as financing is those two new payments would take my savings and then some. We have lost a vehicle to title loans, so that’s not an option, or rather will be one of the final options, selling the royalties is another task I wish to avoid. This house is paid for, bills are minimal and my plan was working.
And now, my forward inertia has come to a screeching halt with everything but this right now. Its very hard for me to ask for help, I hate being judged by someone that doesn’t know me. I am a good persona, my intentions are all good and all for my family. None of this has anything to do with me accept the fact that its my job to make this happen no matter what has to be done, especially asking for it. So not my forte. I am not ashamed to say I am the rock in this family. If something happens its because I make it happen. But I am a little wore out on this one so I am taking the next step and hoping there is someone that wouldn’t mind helping me take care of my life’s work, my family. I want to continue to build the legacy I’ve worked so hard for. I want to keep my promise to my Momma and fix all the things she wanted fixed before she passed. Its been one step forward two steps back, but I am determined to make it to the finish line.
At that line, waiting for me is my husband, my children and my grand children. Ive been a mom, a house keeper and a nanny most of my married life. I’ve never really worked outside of my home.. I’ve sat aside every dream I have ever had for myself, for all of them. And I would do it again and again. I have a pretty good singing voice, 12 years of lessons… could have been famous. But what is being famous without someone to love you and be proud of you and carry you through life? They are all my dreams come true. Id give them the sun if they asked for it. Of course I would have too. Since they gave me the moon. Our grand daughters name is Luna.
If you need proof of legitimacy I have plenty. Including a video of my mothers (plural) funeral services I officiated. I have 2 for my mother in law. One in our church and one at surfside beach in Galveston Texas. I can show you anything and everything if I need too. I just need some help in keeping my promises to them all. I’m not a perfect person, I’ve had my share of mistakes. I’m also 52 years old, and have the knowledge that I will not always be here for my kids. I don’t want to ever leave them with my burdens.
So again I say, this is my story, I know its a long one but honesty isn’t a short story.
If you’ve gotten this far, and even if you have chosen not to help, I just want to say thank you for taking the time to read my story.
paypal.me/CKMorgan