Thank you for reading this im embarrassed to even be doing this I’ve tried every Avenue to try to get myself out of mess I am a hairstylist and after COVID hit I decided I have to build at home because I have no family or help with my kids and school they are now back in person school. I’m still working from home and work is fine maybe a little slow due to economy but basically I have known I’ve had some depression but as a kid I was raised in a foster home because mom was on drugs and dad committed suicide when I was 5 it wasn’t easy but I know it could have been worse I always say that I’m a strong woman and can hold and carry a lot emotionally and mentally and always have been independent because I had to be I never use my past as an excuse well I have 2 children a 15yr and a 9yr at 21/2 my oldest child was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes it was a total life change and challenge not only at home but with her school, people not understanding what it entails, food, dr appointment and so much more emotionally for both of us but I thought I was a strong person I can honestly say my daughter is the strongest person I know! Fast forward life has been okay I’ve always been proud of myself for being a hard worker paying my bills on time and trying to strive for the best always and more because I want my kids to always have a better life than I had and show them any dream is possible with hardwork. well after COVID hit in 2021 it was a Friday in June and my son 7 at the time was also diagnosed with type 1 diabetes but the kicker is….the chance of siblings having the same diagnoses of Type 1 diabetes is literally 5%!!!!! My heart was then shattered into a million pieces thinking why, what did I do in life for both my kids to have this disease they have to do at least 5 injections shots a day for the rest of their life. My faith has been tested since then. We do have insurance so it does help but for both it gets pricey but since I have tried not to spiral but it’s so hard to stay strong and I am so ashamed of myself I never would have thought I would be behind on anything well I can barely keep my head above water I try to keep ahead but I take 5 steps back then go 3 steps back. But I’ve been facing it head on trying hard to work on my credit because I can’t get help with anything (loans, etc) it makes life so hard. I can’t finish my sons second half of oral surgery or braces for my daughter yet because I can’t get over my financial hump . I have no one to turn to no friends or family. I’ve started going to church again and even trying to tithe knowing gods got this and I will be blessed because he knows my heart is with good intentions but I’m so desperate at this point I’ve even thought about doing things in different lines of work that I wouldn’t be proud of but that’s my desperation right now I’m in line to get my car repoed (3000) I’m behind and that is all I have I only have less than 6k in cc debt total but I’m asking please at least my car to get it ahead it would be truly a blessing to just get help with that so I can figure out the rest and have the motivation to get it all together to be okay for myself and my kids especially mentally because I always have a heavy head and heart just knowing I did this to myself and I can’t seem to just get out of it especially when I think I’m doing good something else pops up . I know what I need to do but I just need a miracle blessing and all my hard work on my credit that I have put forth this repo will ruin me. I am a good person and mental illness is real it takes a toll on your whole life but with getting help and therapy and working on myself I know I have to be strong for my kids and I understand god chose me to be there mom for a reason. I made a promise with myself, god, kids with asking for help any denomination with just the repo or everything paid to start fresh if I am blessed I will one day pay it forward to help someone else or a family when I am thriving and back on my feet. PayPal.me/brandymeininger