I am 42 years old. I have been married for almost 4 years. My husband and I have known each other since high school, but we hadn’t seen each other for 20 years when we went on our first date. I had just gone through a heartbreaking divorce and putting myself out there again was hard. I went on the date and we had a lot of fun. I ended up falling in love with him and we eventually got married. It wasn’t until we got married that I realized he wasn’t at all who I thought he was. The physical abuse started, and I completely lost myself. The manipulation was so bad, but at first I didn’t realize it and I’m still very confused all the time because of gaslighting. I finally have the courage to leave, but since I’ve been with him, I haven’t worked, I’ve completely isolated myself from everyone and I am also without a vehicle. Before I met him, I had a job, a dependable car, and now I feel like I have nothing. I’m ready to start over, but money is holding me back from getting a vehicle and a place to live on my own. I recently became a grandmother for the first time, and he lives two hours away from me. I would love to be in the same town as him. Right now my husband is driving me back-and-forth every other week so that I can help my son with my grandson.. I watch him every other week while my son works, so it’s hard to get an 8 to 5 job. I’m willing to work from home and I do some freelancing work but right now it’s just not enough. I’m trying to do some affiliate marketing with a new website I’ve created, but it’s so new and I’m still trying to get the word of the website out there. I’m learning as I go. I feel that the clock is ticking. I don’t know what’s gonna happen while I’m in this relationship and I know I need to get out. I’m ready to start my life over with my two older sons and my new grandson and hopefully a much brighter outlook on life. If I moved, I have no furniture of my own and very little to take with me. I want to be a good example for my children and I can’t do that without standing up for myself and getting out of this bad situation. Any help given would be more precious to me than anything right now. I realize there are shelters I could go to. I worry being somewhere like that would put me in a darker depression. My mental health has really crumbled because of all of this.
Thankyou
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