I have spent much of my life being someone others could turn to. Today, I’m struggling to accept that I need help myself.
Recently, I began recognizing how much my sense of worth had become tied to what I could do for others. When someone was hurting or needed something, I wanted to make it better. Too often, I gave without considering what I would have left.
I gave $1,000 to a coworker who needed an upfront payment before she could begin breast cancer treatment. I gave $1,200 or more to another coworker for fertility treatment. I helped coworkers buy school supplies and clothing for their children. I also helped a lonely woman in a nursing home who had no family to provide basic needs.
These were people I cared about, and their needs mattered to me. But I am learning that someone else’s need does not mean I can always afford to meet it.
Some of that help went on credit cards. At the time, I was working and believed I could manage the payments. During that same period, my home also needed a new roof costing approximately $20,000, which added significant financial pressure.
Through no fault of my own, I am now unemployed, with no income, and also need foot surgery. The recovery is expected to keep me from returning to work in my field for approximately three months. The credit card payments continue, even though my ability to cover them has changed.
I currently owe approximately $7,500 in credit card debt from purchases and expenses I took on for others. That is the amount I am asking for help with. Donations will go toward those balances.
I know I made these financial decisions, and I am taking responsibility for changing the pattern. Through counseling I am learning to set boundaries, stop giving money I cannot afford to give, and build a more stable future. But those changes cannot immediately undo the debt, especially while I am without work and facing recovery.
It is uncomfortable to share this. I have always found it easier to offer help than to admit I need it. But I am asking now because even help with part of this balance would ease the pressure and give me some breathing room while I recover and work toward supporting myself again.
Thank you for reading my story and considering helping. Any contribution would mean a great deal.
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