I understand that there is very little chance that anyone is even going to read this, much less be in a position to help, but I’m desperate, so here we are.
I don’t have a sob story really, and I’m sure that there are people who are in much worse situations than me, but I do have a long story, and I need help.
I’m just going to spill my guts and see what happens I guess, so here we go.
I am a unremarkably average 45 year old guy. I grew up in a pretty poor family and even though I’ve worked hard my entire adult life, I’m one of those people who lives paycheck to paycheck most of the time. I’ve never had anything handed to me my entire life. I’ve never asked anyone for help my entire life, and honestly, I’ve just never “caught a break” my entire life.
I’m very frugal. I don’t waste money. I don’t have any to waste. I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I don’t do drugs. I honestly don’t do much of anything.
In a continuing effort to keep trying to make my life better, I started a small business about 8 months ago. I’m refurbishing used computers and components and selling them on Ebay. It’s actually been going decently for a new business. I’m approaching 30K in sales in the first 8 months! Although I do feel that is a decent gross for the first 8 months of a new business, unfortunately that’s not my net profits. In those 8 months, I’ve cleared about $12,000, which has been enough to keep my bills paid with a little left over.
As I said before, I live a very frugal life. I have a modest place to live, I drive a modest vehicle, and I’m fortunate enough to live in an area with a pretty low cost of living. I don’t have much, but I’m in good health and I’m content for the most part.
Anyway, here’s where we get to why I’m asking for help.
I’ve been single for over 15 years. I haven’t even been on a date in over 15 years. I had pretty much given up on ever finding a partner in life and had made my peace with that.
In October of 2021, partially out of boredom and partially out of loneliness, I made a profile on a dating site. I set my preferences to look anywhere in the world for a potential match.
After about a month, and after having some conversations with around a dozen different women, I hadn’t clicked with anyone on any level and was thinking of giving up.
I then came across a profile from a woman who I thought was very cute and I really liked what she had to say on her profile. The only problem was that she was 8700 miles away from me. Literally on the opposite side of the planet. I hesitated to to even bother sending her a message, but something inside me told me to just do it.
She sent me a message back almost immediately. After just a few minutes of talking on the site, she asked me if I would mind video calling her on Skype because she wanted to make sure I was real before wasting any time. I was okay with this because honestly, I wanted to know she was real too. So I called her.
We ended up talking for 6 hours on Skype that night, well into the early morning hours for me because she is 13 hours ahead of me.
We continued to video call with each other on Skype every single day for 2-4 hours each day for the next month. By the end of a month of talking for hours every day, we both knew we wanted to be together. In December of 2021, we made the decision to enter into a committed long distance relationship. Definitely a first for both of us. Seeing as I’m not a wealthy man, and she’s definitely not wealthy and from a very poor country, we had no idea how we were going to make it happen, but we knew we wanted to be together.
That was almost exactly a year ago. We haven’t missed a single day in that time. We have video called each other every single day for at least 2-4 hours for over year now, and we send each other messages constantly throughout the day when we’re not talking, just to let each other know what we’re doing.
I know it seems crazy to some, but we really are in love. All we want is to just be together.
A few months ago, I promised her I will come to visit her in January. We’re planning on getting married while I’m there. I’ve managed to save up enough to pay for the round trip flight and the first two weeks of accommodations. I’ve also managed to save up enough to get her a VERY modest engagement ring and wedding band, but I’m definitely going to need a little more for the trip.
First of all, I need enough to keep my bills paid while I’m gone. I then need enough to be able to stay for more than two weeks. I can’t stay with her because she lives with many family members and there is simply not enough room. Plus, it’s not okay for us to stay together until we are married in her culture.
My credit isn’t good enough to get a personal loan (I’ve tried), and I honestly have no friends or family with any money to loan me.
I was already stressed about trying to save up enough to go there next month, then I woke up today to a disaster. I had an alert that my checking account was overdrawn. I pay VERY careful attention to my finances and had no idea how this could have happened.
It turns out, I had a credit card that had a almost $800 balance and somehow the autopay got turned on and they withdrew the entire $800 balance from my checking account this morning. I only had about $300 in there, so my account was about NEGATIVE $477. I luckily had just enough in my business account to cover it, so I transferred $500 over quickly, but that still leaves me in a bit of a bind.
So, anyway, here’s where I’m at right this moment. I have a round trip ticket to the other side of the world paid for. I’m suppose to leave on Jan. 24th. I have two weeks in a $40 a night place paid for. I have a very humble engagement ring and wedding band paid for. I have about $30 in my personal checking account and about $100 in my business account.
I have the sweetest, most genuinely good and kind human being I have ever met excitedly waiting for me to come visit her next month. She’s already told all her friends and family that she is getting married. She is SO HAPPY and excited and as rough as my life has been, hers has been so much much worse. All she wants is to be with someone who loves her. She knows I don’t have a lot of money. She doesn’t care. She wants to come here and help grow my business together.
I have a place for us to live. I can provide for us once she’s here, I just need help getting us together. If I can make it there in Jan., and we can get married, it will probably be at least another year before we see each other again, so I just want to be able to go there and spend around 6 – 8 weeks together.
I need a minimum of $5000 sitting in my bank account before I leave on Jan. 24th. That’s enough to keep my bills paid for two months and to make sure I have enough to cover my stay there and our very small civil wedding and reception.
If by some miracle someone out there actually is able to give even more, any extra will be used to help with expenses related to getting her spousal visa approval for coming to the US later next year. Anything over that will be used to help expand my business and try to improve my income.
As I said in the beginning, I know there are others who are in more “life and death” situations than me, but I figured it wouldn’t hurt to ask.
It’s just that I’m a 45 year old guy, and I’ve FINALLY found the love of my life. I have a chance to be happy with an amazing partner for the rest of my life. I just need a little help getting us together. Once we’re together, I have no doubt we’ll be a great team and we’ll work together to make the best life we can. Neither one of us care about being rich. Neither one of us care about material things. We just want to be together. If anyone out there can help make that happen, I will be eternally grateful.
Paypal: paypal.me/thedgt