*Freeze frame* Yep, that’s me. you’re probably wondering how I got into this situation.
I am a knight at 14th century castle and to get through this I will have to use some humor, if I’m laughing I’m at least laughing and hurting but if I’m not laughing I’m only hurting which would be more than I could take at this time in life. We hold the line so that others dont have to, it is how I was brought up: Always aid others but never expect anything in return.
But now I’m tired. So very very tired, and I have noone to turn to. With those words, let my story of woe begin.
4 years ago, business was going well and I had my own company as a guide of the castle. I had good customers, both famous and unknown people and things were looking bright. I had a dream of starting a hostel with a 90’s metal medieval theme. All “adventurer’s guild” mixed with 90’s pinball machines and the likes, people who visited would get tasks to explore the island where I live and do “tasks to earn ranks, to become part of the whole “world” that I was creating for guests and tourists. I wanted to create something that felt familiar, retro and that people would always feel welcoem to and didn’t cost too much to stay at.
That’s when a known member of the community I live in approached me about buying his house, it was large enough to host my dream and it was close to alot of historical areas where guests loved to visit. It was an old building that needed renovations, love and work but none of this was a problem for me. I got a good price in exchange for signing a waiver, it was all just hard work but he didn’t want me to charge him back. At least the house did not contain mold and he promised to repair some of the things that were broken as well. I was planning on adopting and to start a family so the large house was a dream to be in more ways than one.
Most of my capital was now tied to a building that’s when disaster struck my family, my father was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and it was spreading fast, any thoughts of working on my business and dream would have to wait and instead I did my outmost to make my father feel better and spent any time I didn’t work on taking care of my father and mother. Why? Cause they had done it for me since I was a kid and family is important.
Barely had one year passed and COVID struck, meaning there were no guests visting the island and my company slowly faded and died. I was now digging into savings to keep myself afloat and lived to work, which is fine as that is what was expected. It was fine.
Then another year of COVID and lockdown and with the last of my savings gone, the company dead due to no guests visiting the castle, my father still clinging to life I gave up on my dreams and closed my company. For some reason I was also starting to feel ill, ache and pain was common and I thought it was due to stress. Not that I felt stress, I wouldn’t allow myself to do that I thought but sometimes your body tells you what it needs now what you want.
And now we’re on the fourth year, my father is feeling better but I am feeling worse. So bad that I had to see a doctor due to constant coughing and muscle ache. At first they thought I had COVID but it proved to not be the case, instead they found black mould toxicity during my blood works. I was being posioned by my own house.
At first I couldn’t believe it, this was the one thing I was guaranteed to be safe from. I called a construction company and my worst fears were confirmed, black mold had spread from the bathrooms to other parts of the house and the damage were over ten years old, way before I paid for it. In desperation I called another company, they confirmed again the black mold and added that the foundation of the house was so badly damaged that I would have to repair it. Beyond that walls, electricity, water and roof had to be repaired. The house was slowly becoming my tomb.
I still couldn’t believe this was happening. I considered myself a good man, I’ve always supported and helped others when possible. I have never asked for anyhting. Why would I get one kick after another. Why me? WHY?
I cant cry, it is impossible. Years of conditioning to be a “man” has removed that ability for me. So instead I hurt. And I ache.
I have contacted an attorney but they consider it a lost battle as I signed the waivers as I didn’t want to inconvinence an old man. I have contacted my insurance company but they told me that the repairs would be even higher. I’ve contacted realtors but they think my chances of selling the house are quite slim due to the mold. I cannot afford to rent an apartment due to paying off the house. The bank would place me in massive debts if I cant pay off the loan. I am stuck, locked in a huge coffin that’s slowly sapping my life away.
I dont have it in me to fight anymore. To struggle. To get back up. As I live now I keep on working to pay off the house that’s making me sick. I feel nothing but cannot see life as anything but a waiting hall for death to claim me so that I can finally rest. I have nowhere to turn, my dream of a family is in ruins, I have noone to ask and I have no possibility to run a long and strong campaign for aid.
I turn to you. A person that dont know me.
I am not asking to be saved.
I just dont want to spend the rest of my life looking forward to deaths release.
There are three ways out of this.
1. I manage to gather 50.000 euro so that I can pay off the loan and rent an apartment so that I can survive.
2. People support me and aid me with 230.000 euro so that I can repair what is needed in the house so that it becomes livable and I’ll pay the loan off in the normal way.
3. Somehow, through people giving me back my trust in human kindness or even a miracle, I manage to gather 310.000 euro so that I can restore the house and start the hostel I dreamt of running.
310.000 euro is a huge sum of money, as I type this some weird kind of hope is growing inside me. If by some wonder this comes to be I will add the contributors names to the history of the hostel as saviors and heroes so that they may live in guests imagination for as long as it exists.