Hi, thank you for taking the time to read my story.
Where does one start when asking a complete stranger for help?
I never thought I’d be on the internet baring my soul and relying on the kindness of strangers… yet here we are.
I’m a 47 year old divorced mother of 2, who has spent the last 31 years working without the typical life goals that everyone else had conventionally, I never thought of the importance of buying a house at a younger age, worked at a young age 16…never finished high school & married young. I ended up divorced after an abusive (mentally and physically) relationship destroyed all my self esteem and belief that one needed a partner in life. I have been divorced for 17 years now, sometimes people intervene when u need them most in life. I was beaten and a neighbor called the police, and I found the courage to be a single mom. During that time I received no child support (even tho it was court ordered) and worked hard to raise my kids to be respectful and productive members of society. I worked for a small family owned business for 15 years and worked my way to management! working long hours to give my kids a great chance at life and provide all the basic necessities was not even a question, I would do it again in a heartbeat.
My oldest child graduated with honors, and moved into a place which I cosigned. I had purchased furniture for him, and my younger child who is very introverted and shy due to abuse from his father at an early age… entered the workforce aswell. For a short time life was great!! I was proud of where I was, and what I achieved.
Then reality hit. I was working 50+hrs a week at my job, and one day I started getting dizzy at work and would have to lay on the floor for a few moments at a time to get my bearings. “you’re working too hard, maybe you should take a few days off” is what I told myself. I for the first time went home from work that day, and slept for about 12 hours. I was awakened in the middle of the night with my heart racing, and I couldn’t stand… I was blacking out. I went into my sons room and calmly told him I was calling an ambulance, and for him not to worry.
Made my way downstairs and unlocked my front door and waited for the ambulance to arrive. Upon arrival, it was discovered that I had no blood pressure and my heartrate was at 230bpm. The paramedics had to use the defibulators to generate a blood pressure before they could take me to the emergency. and let me tell you… its definitely not like on tv… one should be under anethestesia when being resuscitated. I suffered fractured ribs, intermuscular bruising, and still have spinal pain today.
At that time I was unable to work, so went on sick benefits through unemployment insurance… (16 weeks was the max at that time) one of the downsides of working for a small business is the lack of benefits and insurance.
It was discovered after 6 ER visits in the next 2 months, that I had an arrhythmia in my heart and would need a cardiac ablation. in those 2 months I was unable to do the most basic things without triggering an attack, co my mental health took a serious hit. The wait for surgery was long, and in my absence from work, my bosses decided it was time for them to sell and retire. I had met the new owners and was promised my position when I was able to return. My sickness benefits had run out at that point, and since I wasn’t able to go to work or actively seek employment… I didn’t apply for regular benefits. (I did have savings which was down to $0 at that point). I received my annual Christmas bonus that year from the original owners, which helped me get by for the next few months. Surgery was booked for march 2020. With everything that was happening at that time my surgery was delayed. with the delay, the new owners decided they could not wait for my return… so I was technically let go from the job I had come to love for so many years. I received 8 weeks pay for compensation, (at the time I wasn’t aware of my rights, nor did I have the strength to fight ) I know now as management I was entitled to 1 month for each year of service (it is past the date to bring legal action) . May 28th,2021 the day had finally come.
The surgery was successful, however I went back to the hospital 5 days later with a blood clot and suffered a pulmonary embolism. But I’m a fighter and overcame that aswell.
I thought it would be easy to get a job, however with the pandemic it was difficult. I found temporary work here and there, but I was either overqualified for jobs, or lacking education. I am now working at minimum wage, and having a very difficult time making ends meet.
My son has been helping with the bills as much as he can, but living on his own he is unable to continue to support me. I am currently dealing with Hypothyroidism, depression, and am under the constant stress of just being a burden. If I could turn back the hands of time, i would’ve continued my education, and purchased a house. As it stands now, i’m $15,000 in debt, and at risk to have my utilities turned off, and cant afford my medication. The only phone calls i get are from bill collectors, and even though i’m working, it feels like i’ll never get ahead of my debt.
I just want to be the strong independent person I once was, I would like to go back to school, and get a degree in business admin. As I have real life Experience, but lack the certificate for a livable wage job. If there is an angel out there i could sure use a little lift.
Thank-you for reading the sad story which is now my life. I know it’s a very unlikely thing to happen, but if you don’t ask.. you will never receive. As humbling as it was to write this all down, i feel a bit of relief just typing the words out.