Two years ago I became classified as officially disabled. I had been attending as a volunteer in Lourdes to look after paralysed and heavily disabled persons, and became ill with glandular fever. This was due to a weakened immune system subsequent to a year of severe depression which I had been taken to hospital for after numerous suicide attempts.
The glandular fever caused me to have a low white blood cell count alongside vitamin D deficiency, chronic fatigue/ME and fibromyalgia which I have suffered for for over two years now, which I will suffer with for the rest of my life.
When I got diagnosed, I was two days away from my first A level exam. Both my teachers as well as my doctor and the CFS/ME clinic professionals told me that if I took all three of my A Levels that I would fail them all; I could hardly walk or even leave my bed some days, and the brain fog and memory loss I received was detrimental to my studies. As an A* student throughout school, this was a major blow, especially seeing as I had spent the past 6 years working so hard towards this moment. I had no choice but to take two of my subjects and receive mediocre grades. I was supposed to be attending UCL after the exams, but no university accepts just two A level results, let alone the ones I received. Fortunately one university took me in based on my GCSE grades.
However, I am now in my second year of university, my grades at the end of my first year were awful and I barely passed, I couldn’t attend lectures as my health decreased further as I developed pleurisy and acid reflux as well as an unknown allergy every time I go home, so I’m currently unable to see my family as no antihistamines or steroids help.
This year feels just as bad, I got a job to survive as I get no external funding or help from my parents, but this is trying as even an hour of work results in three days of recovery as my joints and muscles refuse to work and leave me in excruciating pain. I’ve attended only a few lectures and I have no clue how I can even do the assignments I’ve been given. I need help. I worry about my future more so each day as my present becomes more and more unbearable. Feeding myself becomes a struggle, let alone being able to afford to do so.
I’m asking for any financial aid possible. People don’t understand how disabling my disabilities are, and many people don’t know they exist let alone of detrimental they are to your entire life. I’ve developed anxiety, my depression has become severe and I have developed body dysmorphia as well as the pleurisy etc. Life is hard, and I would be so grateful if you could help me, so I can at least put some money into savings for when I need to pay back my tuition fees, or to help feed me when I can’t work in order to do so. I can’t describe how much I’m struggling at the moment. I really just don’t know how longer I can suffer from everything and have nothing much to do other than sit there and stress about it. Please.
If you would like to help, even the smallest amount will. My paypal is firstname.lastname@example.org