You cannot fix stupid, but maybe you could help me trying to be smarter?
I have Asperger.
It is an “disease” in the autism-spectra.
On the upside, I’m straightforward.
On the downside, I take things literally .
It doesn’t mean that I trust everybody, I more or less have trust issues . But it do mean that if you say that you’d do something, I know you will do it. It is beyond “believing”, I know that you will do what you say.
Having that said, I’ve learnt that it is easy for some to say one thing, but do another.
Here it is:
10 years ago, I sold my house to help a family member who are sick. She is better, that’s a good thing. She still lives, that is fantastic. The house sold with debt, that is a bad thing, but I still have her in life, so I will NEVER complain about my debt, that is money, and I got life in return!
But you need to know about it, so you understand that I’m out of options.
Almost a year ago my best friend approached me.
I’ve known him for 25 years. He had problems paying his rent and asked me if I could borrow him $500. Of course I did. He paid it back the following month. No worries . The next month he needed $300. Being less then the month before I thought it was okey to loan him the money again. And he paid it back. Perfect!
He continued to loan and paying back. 6 months later I asked why he didn’t do anything to fix the situation. He replied that the reason he loaned less money each time was because he had gotten a second job, and was getting back on track again.
I got really happy and loaned him again, and again he paid me back.
2 months ago he called me in tears, really sobbing! I asked what had happened . And he told me that he lost custody of his children to the mother and on top of that he needed to pay the lawyers $15 000. Money he really didn’t have. (Here in Sweden, $15 000 is half of a normal years salary)
He asked if I could help in any way, maybe take a loan or something. I asked why he couldn’t loan by himself, and he replied that the bank wouldn’t accept him since his job was only 5 months old, and that it needed to be a year before he could loan from the bank.
I checked with my bank what I could do, since I still had my own loan from the house I sold, which from the beginning were $35 000.
My bank said that I could loan $12 000.
I called my friend back and said that 12 000 was possible, and it would be $400 a month with interest and mortgage, for quite some time (several years).
Oh my god, that’s fine! He replied. Would you do that for me?
Of course, I said.
So I set it up, and I gave him the money.
And he disappeared …
He doesn’t answer my calls, letters or texts.
So now I’m stuck paying an extra loan. So almost half of my salary goes to my 2 loans now.
I’m a single mom with a 6-yearold, a fulltime job and an extrajob on 30%.
So I hardly see her to start with, and now I can’t even afford buying her a new overall for winter. (Yes, I got one from my sister, my daughter wont freeze, but so you understand how I mean)
Is there any possibility that you can help us?
Even a small amount will help me at least to pay this months fee. And I’ll try to come up with a new plan for next month.
I need $400 to pay the fee this month, and never did I think that I would beg for it, but I really don’t know what else to do right now.
I’ll probably get a third job, but really don’t want to steal so much time from my daughter, it is REALLY not her fault, and I know that she wants to spend as much time as possible with me.
As for now I already leave her at kindergarten 6 in the morning and get her 6 at night, and during my weekendjob, a lot of people help me with her.
Every bit helps, even a dollar.
I’m desperate (and stupid) but I only wanted to help!
Thank you and lots of love
And if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask!