Hello everyone. I don’t know who will see this but please I need your help so bad.
I came across this site after almost trying to kill me self again. Why?
I am a mom of 3 children. I was married for 15 years to a man that I didn’t know he was alcoholic and abuser.
For 15 years I lived in fear, beaten, abused and … you may ask why not run. I didn’t have any family here, no financials and he was controlling my phone, what I was eat, and who my eye got in contact with. He Burn me with hot water 2 times and beating was my everyday life. I will sleep in the bathroom almost every day. Last year November 2019 was the hardest year but thank God I got help. It was a Friday morning when he ask me for money, I said I didn’t have any. He got very mad and push me on the floor and start to choke on me. I fought so hard to free my self but at some point I just let go because I felt like it for the best. I told my self at that moment death it better that living with him. Just before passing out my son came from his room because he heard us and jump in and start fighting his dad to save me. Son(12 years old) at that moment my 9 years took the phone and call the police… (the abuse was not only on me but on the children as well.. I can’t even write everything) at that moment the police came and we were taken away to a safe place and he was taken in. Threats from his family started to come in. They were saying that he didn’t kill me why he has to be in jail? They threatened me not to press charges….. long story short… After getting help and finding a place,, he found out where we were leaving. We run away and in hinding until now. It is really getting heard and I got the point of wanting to just go back and endure the abuse because I don’t have money or financial help.
I am hiding in a basement of a friend and sharing the bed with the kids. It is really difficult to feed them and dressing them. This winter we spent it without even jackets.
My friends was giving us her place temporarily. Now I have to find a place and she was the only friend that was not his friend and I was feeling safe.
We are in a car that I haven’t pay for the past 2 years and I fear it will be taken away and we will be sleeping outside.
I lost my job because I am in hiding, my small business that I start I lost it too. He destroyed that one.
In the past 15 years I try to commit suicide 3 times but it never work. I always wake up after the attempt. I know now that it is not the best solution, but I am really, really out of options. The only refuge we have is the car but they are looking for it too.
I know going back will guarantee my death but what to do with the kids?
Please I am writing to seek some help.
Please please please am begging for your help. We need everything. Me and my 3 kids.
A place to live, clothes, food, money, job…….. and with the pandemic, it super hard. I don’t even have a laptop to work.
Please, pretty please find in your heart to help us.