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Last Updated: February 18, 2019

I fear for our safety, please help

I’ve never asked for financial assistance or help and never thought my life would come to this point; I am a single mom with a teenage daughter; divorced her father when she was still a baby and raised her on my own ever since. Her father pays the equivalent of $130 per month and has never increased this amount in almost 15 years. She is a good child, studies very hard, doesn’t drink or do drugs, accepts a 23:00 curfew and doesn’t have the typical teenage tantrums I so often hear about from other parents. I’ve raised her on my own for most of her life and she is very appreciative of everything I do or buy for her. So in general I am one of those blessed mothers who have the privilege to enjoy my daughter, enjoy motherhood and also have a best friend.

The trouble is that my daughter doesn’t deserve to live in a situation like we currently do. We’ve been living with my long term boyfriend for the past 15 months and up to the end of last year things were quite okay; but life took a nasty turn at the end of last year. I was retrenched at work and didn’t receive a big severance package; BUT I am not one of those people who allows life and things that happen to me to break me; it’s very important to me that my daughter doesn’t worry about a roof over heads, food, clothes, school fees, medical fees, car installments, loan repayments etc. etc. I do no not expect my boyfriend to support either me or my daughter financially, so I started baking from home; go to markets, caterers, wedding planners, individuals etc. with my baked goods, but it doesn’t bring in enough money to support us. I owe the bank money, must still pay off my car and must still pay an amount to the receiver of revenue…

My boyfriend has always been very controlling when it comes to anything me and my daughter do, but lately things are getting out of hand. He has a very short temper and we are going through extreme emotional abuse. We live in his house and he constantly tells us to “f#*% off”, that he’ll pack our bags for us etc. The problem is that this emotional abuse is taking a toll on us and we’re turning into robots, too afraid to take a wrong step. His parents, whom we love like our own, lives across the street, but his father, who has been ill for quite a few years, passed away a month ago and we supported everybody through this emotional time, which brought us closer together after the abuse and fights of the past 3 months. But today things hit rock bottom; keep in mind that he has hit both me and my daughter on occasion during the last few months, he threw me across our bed, which resulted in a popped disc (I’ve had a back operation to repair a broken vertebra 9 years ago) and was quite painful. Today was just the last straw for me; he took his mother and sister (who lives in another country) to the airport, so his mother can get away from everything familiar and come to terms with the death of her husband. His mother is my support and anchor; I’ve dreaded this day for the past week since she announced that she’s going away for a few weeks. She knows about the physical abuse and protects me and my daughter when my boyfriend hits one of his crazy moods. My boyfriend has his own business and does well financially, but he doesn’t support me and my daughter, something of which I am very proud. I moved in with him because I loved him, not because I need a man to look after me; but I cannot take his abuse anymore. He uses the fact that I am not financially in a position to afford my own apartment or the living costs that goes with moving out, to break me down, beat me, call me names, tell us f-off, threatens to throw our stuff on the street etc. I am so afraid of him; we are so careful and I have some voice recordings of his abuse.

Please, I’ve been working an average of 14 hours a day for the past month, I am not lazy and only a beggar, I just want to start over in a safe place and give my daughter the life she deserves. PLEASE HELP ME get out of debt and start a new life before it’s too late?

The country I live in doesn’t support receipt of PayPal payments, I can only make payments through PayPal. I am willing to send a donor my bank statements and supporting documents to confirm my situation.

Please, I fear for my life and have no family or friends to turn to; I’ve been isolated from everyone for the past year… I need about US$30000 to get out of debt and afford rent and deposits for an apartment of our own

Filed Under: Single Moms Tagged With: Africa

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