The weather is cold and so are the people in this town. It sucks because I can’t be. I don’t steal from people or rip them off and I’m horrible at lying and being deceitful.. but that’s how people around here feel like that’s how they have to be to get ahead. It’s every man for themselves. Unless you’re willing to be THAT girl. You know the one that you get her a little alcohol and a little bit of shit and she keeps a guy entertained for a while and he does what he wants with her and then she’s out the door. I can’t do that either. I can’t and I refuse to become a prostitute or f**k for for a place to live. I love and I feel and I’m scared. It’s cold out and I don’t have anywhere to go.
I ‘ve had a place of my own to live and I been taking care of myself and my baby. I been working and paying rent for the past 12 years. I’ve started with nothing and I came up. I’m a 36 year old Native American single mother with a bachelor’s degree in Business Administration specialzing in accounting. My son is 12 years old and he misses me dearly. I lost my $24/hr job back in April of this year due to COVID and my life has been a downward spiral since. I lost my job, my apartment, my son, I wrecked my car in October and then finally my ex went back to prison. Now it’s just me. A shitty as our relationship was he was sort of taking care of me. He didn’t pay my bills, he cheated on me a lot but he still would make sure I was okay.. when he felt like it. I have family and friends but they think it’s not worth helping me get on my feet. To them, I’m not doing anything to help myself so they don’t want to help me.
I’m homeless with no car. There isn’t public transportation in this town and I’m never getting on public housing or assistance ever again. I did all that years ago. I want to work but it’s difficult to commit to a job when you have nowhere to live and no way to get to and from work. I’ve worked hard for everything I had and I lost it all. I can think of a million things I’ve done wrong in my life but none of them make me think that I really deserve to be where I am right now. I want to blame my ex but it’s my fault for thinking he loved me enough to make sure this doesn’t happen to me. I wasn’t supposed to end up like this. Please find it in your heart to send me your gift. Help me get back on my feet and be better.
Please help me get my son back. I need money to rent a car or have enough to put down and make payments for a couple of months. With a car, I can go back to working delivery service jobs such as instacart and doordash. That’s what I did all summer before I wrecked mine and I made pretty decent money. Rooms would be nice too. I was living in my car when it was hot this summer. Then I started living with my ex and getting kicked out every few days or every week or so then the last time he kicked me out, he went to jail 8 hours later and had to go back to prison. Karma. So I been staying with people since and I hate it. I can’t have shit. I keep my belongings in storage but without a car, it’s difficult to find a ride to get clean clothes when I need to. I sold most of furniture and household stuff out of there so I can downsize to a smaller unit. Rooms cost about $40/ night $340/ week or $1200/ month. I don’t want to sign a lease without a job so I would rather stay in a motel room. At least they are warm, safe, secure, clean and include utilities and wifi. I know having my own space with a kitchenette is all I need. With a car and a place to stay, I promise to get my shit together.