My Story
My name is Nathaniel. I came from a fairly decent home, had both parents equally involved in my life and I was happy, for the most part. I grew up with two sisters and one brother. We lived in a three-bedroom, one bathroom home when I was young. About 7 years old, we moved into a more comfortable home in a quiet neighborhood, and then we upgraded down the street when I was about 11. Anyways, I grew up with great friends (not very good influences, but nonetheless) went to a public school and graduated. I worked with my father once I turned 18 and was blessed with a 10-acre property that my grandfather had made a life-estate for me. My grandfather, bless his soul, was battling alcoholism, a form of dementia, and a divorce all at the same time. His ex-wife had left him with a hollow hole in his heart and he was struggling with an enormous amount of health and mental problems, all the while she robbed him of his money and abandoned him when he needed her the absolute most. I remember him telling me “Never get married, sign a prenuptial agreement, don’t let any woman take your money” I lived with a best friend for a while (call him Frank) and an ex (Call them Leila) who are now in a relationship (very disappointing). I assume they were doing things behind my back in this home. I struggled to pay the bills on this 10-acre property, as well as keep up with the work on the home. My grandfather used the property to raise farm animals, which was nice but overwhelming. I began a constant use of alcohol to cope with the re-occurring problems of credit card debt, relationship problems, and home-remodeling problems as well as work stress due to my job being very manual-labor intensive. My best friend Frank ended up moving out because I had told him to get his cat fixed due to his cat peeing all over my home, and my ex-girlfriend Leila had left due to the constant alcoholism and problems that arose. My family very rarely helped me financially or physically with the home, and they were rarely there. I still am confused as to why they would invest in such a property and then allow it to fall apart due to a young adults’ inability to maintain the property. Nonetheless, I was blessed, and I didn’t realize it at all. So, my ex-girlfriend moved out around January of 2021, and this is when things really started to get bad for me. Nothing could prepare me for what was to come. I’ll get right to the point.
The Black Witch
March of 2021, I met the most wonderful woman (Call her Paige) on a dating app. She was beautiful, interesting, innovative, spiritually perfect, smart, a hard worker, all-in-all I believed she was truly my soulmate after spending time together. I moved her in fairly quick, as I needed help with my bills, and she was living in a horrible apartment about an hour away from me. We decided it was better to live together as to save money and time. In the first month alone, she began cleaning my home, cooking me dinner, making the house a literal home. She took care of the livestock, would bring waters out to my grandfather and his workers when they would come up, would garden and do housework. She was amazing sexually, emotionally she filled me up, and mentally I was strong as could be. It didn’t last long, of course. About two months in, she began demanding more from me. She was separated from her ex-husband who was still in the military at the time. She would go on for quite a time telling me about stories of abuse, cheating, lying, and other types of things. Of course, this gave me the initiative to play the ”hero” role, looking back I was a fool. Anyways, her true colors came out one lovely day in May. We were just getting ready to go to the general store downtown. Her sister calls, stating that “My boyfriend is having me jumped at a gas station, I need you here now Paige!” We rushed to the gas station, Paige was screaming at me pounding the dashboard and telling me “Hurry up!” Cursing at me, I pushed this aside because I understood her desire to be there for her sister. We went to the gas station and her sister was bloody. Fingernails falling off, bruises all over her, and serious concussions. A lot of her belongings were stolen as well. Paige refused to accept these conditions, and practically forced me to take her and her sister to the home. I kept telling Paige “Please call the police, they will handle this correctly” but she refused and took justice into her own hands. I drove to his house, foolish mistake. They both went inside of the home and began taking “her sisters” things out of this home, or so I believed. We ended up filing a police report and taking her sister to the hospital. Afterwards, we went home and held onto her sisters’ belongings for her.
A week later, the police department is reaching out to Paige and trying to confirm the story of what happened. I had taken Paige down to the police department, at which point the Chief began reciting Paige the Miranda rights. I was absolutely shocked to find out the belongings she took from the home were apparently stolen, and I was distraught because Paige was now being turned into police custody. My entire weekend was filled with crying, drinking and anger as I drove around town furious that such an injustice could be done upon Paige, an “innocent” young woman. Yeah, right. She was arrested on a Friday, and her sister cleared her name on a Monday morning which surprisingly her sister was sent out on her own recognizance. I begged my father to pay Paige’s bond, she was facing two felonies and one misdemeanor. After a lengthy day of begging with him, he told me it was a horrible idea, but he finally gave in. We paid a bondsman close to 1,500 dollars to get her out that Monday evening. I remember her running to me out of the jail, hugging me intensely and crying, thanking me for helping her. Now we had to face the charges head-on, which looking back, was ridiculous.
Her grandmother died the same week she was released from jail on a bond. I can remember the whole week, I slept for maybe one day. I was so concerned with Paige’s’ mental health and her freedom, on top of that I was busy consoling her with all of the crises’ she was facing, it seemed like a never-ending battle. I ended up pulling some credit cards together and paying a top-notch lawyer $5,000 to fight her case, at which later it was dismissed. I can still remember her being ungrateful for me not being in court with her that day, being ungrateful that I wasn’t there on time to pick her up. I really started to notice the red flags, but I was so swooned over her, so head over heels that I couldn’t begin to let this girl go.
We fought, but what couple doesn’t? I began pouring myself into her, financially, emotionally, physically and mentally. I spent another $1,500 to get her lawyer to file a protection order against her ex-husband, which was granted due to her claims of abuse and stalking (which I don’t know if any of it is true to this day). They had agreed at the police station to a dissolution of marriage, while he was giving some of her belongings back. I was never warned from this man to fear her until much later down the line, once the damage was done. I would spend whatever on this girl just to keep the love coming that she had to offer but would withhold it if I didn’t meet her demands, I was too young and inexperienced to notice this early on. I was throwing out money for her wisdom teeth, for clothes and furniture and food, for vacations, everything you can think of. There was a constant of manipulation, gas lighting, blame shift, triangulation, isolation, all sorts of abuse I was unable to recognize as I was so inexperienced in relationships. By the time August came around, every one of my credit cards were overspent and I was financially in shambles, but I still believed her to be my true soulmate as the connection we had was out of this world, or so I believed. I was overwhelmed with finances, mental and physical angst, and the alcoholism didn’t help me recognize any of the bad patterns. I was once told by her “I am a borderline with personality disorder” at which I responded with “I’ve met crazy before, I can handle you I promise”. Boy, was I dumb. That should’ve been my opportunity to run away as fast as possible. You’d think this is a normal love story, but it gets worse.
I was furious one night, as I was having trouble conforming to a new job with miserable co-workers and I felt stuck in life due to the financial impulsivity between both of us. I was drunk and foolish, and I had left the house to drive down an old dirt road. To my surprise, a state highway patrol officer was waiting at the end of the road, with a truck broke down. I had an open can in the cup holder, and I tossed it in the back. Safe to say, I was charged with a D.U.I and was put on probation for six months as well as had to get an interlock on my vehicle for six months and undergo some substance abuse classes. This put even further stress on me, as I barely had enough money to get by as it was. Now I had to put out even more money for my own foolish mistakes. Even worse, my grandfather passed in October, a literal day before my birthday. It just seemed like things were getting worse and worse, but I was stuck on this belief that Paige was the light behind the darkness. I fought with my family hard about the property, the livestock, things on the property, attorney fees, all these types of things. It was a nightmare I was living in, and I had to keep a miserable job, so I didn’t go to jail.
Months went by, and December was when I listed the house for sale with a cruddy realtor who took total advantage of someone who knew nothing of real-estate. I ended up cashing out about 165k on the ten-acre property, which looking back I could have made a lot more from this, but I was so desperate to get out of the home and stop spending money on it. My septic tank was failing, and my water line was busted so I was putting out money I didn’t even have. Paige was working an at-home job with a shopping company, and we were barely getting by.
Anyways, we moved into a very small home in the city, a much more manageable home for me and the bills were cheap. I began paying off a lot of my credit, furnishing the new home, painting and making a comfortable space for us to live in. She purchased all of the belongings on her accounts, though all of it was spent from my bank account. Stupid right? I really started noticing things, as this was February of 2022. She would become furious when I would refuse to spend money on useless belongings, even if I assured her that we could come back later on and purchase them. I still was pouring myself into her just to get breadcrumbs of love that I was so used to having in the beginning. Things just weren’t the same. I even paid for her divorce, which was another 5 grand.
This is about the time I found out she was pregnant. I didn’t believe she could even GET pregnant, as that’s what I was told. For over a year we tried, but it wasn’t working (which I was grateful for). She had PCOS, a past of miscarriages and mental health issues but I was willing to work with her as I loved her so much. I pleaded with her not to keep the child, as I was worried about her physical and mental health as well as my mental and financial health.
We fought for weeks about this until March 17th, 2022. The night before, I was of course drinking, and she was complaining of pains and aches. I kept telling her to call an ambulance, because she wanted me to take her to the hospital, but I wasn’t sober. I told her I would sober up, but I wasn’t taking her because of the constant fighting, and I didn’t believe she needed the hospital. I was planning to go to my friend’s house that night, but she had hidden my keys! Her sister ended up bringing her children’s Tylenol for the pain, and that night I had slept on the couch barely getting any sleep. I was woken up in the morning with screaming and nuisance from what I remember. I gave her four thousand dollars earlier that week as a promise that if we had broken up, she would be safe. Now she went outside to greet her friends, and I shut the door behind her, locking it. She screamed out loud to the entire neighborhood, claiming I slammed her foot in the door and called the police stating I domestically abused her. In all reality, she was trying to bring her friends into my home and steal all of my possessions, but what was I supposed to do? I felt scared, angry, abandoned by the one person I believed I could depend on; I was living in a nightmare and for some reason I couldn’t wake up!
I ran out of the back door of the house, locking it behind me. I was arrested not long after, as it was a Friday, and I spent the weekend in jail until a Monday afternoon. I was released on my own recognizance, as I am a well-trusted individual. The hearing came and went, and I was proven not guilty of domestic violence as my security cameras proved she was lying about her foot being slammed in the door. She had grabbed the wrong foot!
She didn’t take EVERYTHING, but she had taken a large portion of what belonged to me. Luckily, I still had money to refurnish the home, but I had to make a conscious choice to either pay my credit or go with no belongings. I was stuck in a conundrum.
I was still in turmoil, having lost the love of my life and a large fortune of money on someone who didn’t care at all, and instead wanted to see me dead and hung to the very last moment. I started spending time with horrible influences, drinking much heavier than I ever have, and eventually these influences went to jail. This left me alone, scared, miserable and missing the one person who put me in a horrible position to begin with. I started reading up on borderline personality disorder, and I was so disappointed. I felt like I had failed Paige, like I didn’t affirm her emotions enough and should’ve encouraged her having child instead of dismissing the situation.
One unfortunate day, she reached back out. Told me we were having a little girl. I was so happy; I ran back to her new apartment, and we were passionate with each other. It felt like the beginning again, she was treating me so highly and loving me with an abundance of care. My family was bashing her (rightly so) but this was the mother of my to-be child, how could I let them speak so ill of her?
Her entire pregnancy was a nightmare for me. So stupid. She convinced me that I was mentally insane. That I was the one who had a personality disorder, that I had an identity disorder. This led to me actually believing I was a bad guy. If something is reinforced in your mind every single day, eventually you begin to believe it. We would fight like cats and dogs, but more so like lions and elephants. Nobody was casualty-free. There were always mental injuries at the end of each fight, and no apologies were given from her. I was always sure to apologize, may it be the next morning or shortly after. This was because I was always forced to believe it was my fault, the blame-shift of course.
I would drive her almost two hours away every single week, as her pregnancy was considered high-risk. My last $1,500 was spent on baby items and belongings for her, 8 months before the baby was even born. I still stood next to her even after being convinced by her that I was crazy, and that she was this ”abused” woman” created by me!
I had got a car loan in July and was working for a food delivery company twelve hours a day just to support her through all of this. I would work, then come home and work, barely getting time to even sleep. My credit cards began piling up again, and I started to believe this was a cycle. I couldn’t get out of the relationship because I was so heavily invested and was petrified that she would call the police for something that didn’t happen if I tried to break it off. I was isolated from family and friends; I couldn’t go anywhere to get away. On the other hand, I felt like even if I did try to get away, I was losing someone I loved so dearly, the mother of my child, the soulmate I had once believed in so truly.
I couldn’t hold down a job due to the crises that would arise every single day. I was so angry with her because of all of the debt, it had also felt like all of my work and money would just go towards debt and I never seen any of it for myself. It became a struggle all over again to live.
November comes around, she woke me up screaming at me, threatening me because I was refusing to go out and get cigarettes for her. We got in a push-and-shove, breaking things around the house. I was threatened that I would never see my daughter again as she would move out of the county, at which point I ripped her passport up. It was truly horrible. She called the police again, only this time I had managed to get away (though she hid my wallet). Again, I was on my own recognizance. My parents thankfully took me back into their home while Paige lived in my home. We went on-and-off talking for months, but I finally had the strength to break it off and seek some form of help. I was given a disorderly conduct and three months of unsupervised probation.
I let her stay at my home for months, paying all of the bills and even making payments on a car so she could drive to and from work while I watched the child. When I finally got back into my home, it was worse than the first time. She had taken literally everything, from the bed, the TV, the dishwasher, couches, all of the babies’ belongings, practically everything. My attorney told me there was nothing I could do, and even if there was, it wasn’t worth the fight. I am currently still living with my parents as I cannot afford to refurnish or renovate my now torn-apart home, all the while she lives unscathed in a rental with all of the belongings that I purchased.
Do I deserve anything?
Do I deserve any money from you? Absolutely not, this was all my own fault, and I am learning how to hold true to boundaries and not be co-dependent to these types of venomous women. I fell for a want-to-be love story filled with wishful thinking, wanting to be the hero overall. I am very grateful if you’ve made it to the bottom of this, just for listening and learning my story. Maybe I’ll be able to help others with the knowledge I’ve learned and save them from investing in a lifetime of regret and agony. My heart hurts every day from the pain I was put through, selling such a large piece of property for someone who never cared about me to begin with and only wanted to leech and steal from me. I am since then starting to get better, having been baptized, going to therapy weekly, and working almost every day all the while maintaining a healthy relationship with my beautiful daughter.
I would just like to ask for a donation, as I really need to refurnish my home for my daughters’ sake. She really needs a crib, new flooring, clothing and I really need a bed and furniture. I would appreciate anything that you have to offer. Thank you all so much for reading this, and please be safe in your endeavors with relationships. It’s no joke.
The image you see will show only a fraction of my credit cards, at which point I’m close to 50k in debt. I don’t know what I’m going to do, it’s all a never-ending nightmare but I’m hoping by putting this information out there, I may save someone from this turmoil and maybe get some donations for my daughter and me.
My PayPal is paypal.me/nvf123
I had forgot to put my PayPal in the other request, so I apologize.