Hello, I am an undergraduate college student studying psychology! What’s the deal? Well, currently I am struggling to receive any source of financial aid support from school due to the need of varying paperwork I don’t have at this time. I have rent coming up soon, and I hope to take care of my half so that my honey doesn’t have to go through the burden of covering it for me, when it’s my responsibility to provide for us, including groceries, taking care of our house, and paying for rent every month. He’s the best boyfriend I could ever ask for, and I just want to keep him worry free, he has done so much for us and I just want to make sure that we’re taken care of.
I was recently laid off from my job serving coffee for two years – I loved my regulars, I loved my coworkers they were some of the most fabulous people I have had the gift of getting to work with however I lost two family members in this tough time and I feel more comfortable being laid off and being at home than to surround myself in an environment detrimental to my mental and physical health where I’m seriously uncomfortable with the changes and lack of precaution and care for workers. I have too many people I care about/that care about me to risk anything, so I have to stand on that. As I communicate with my schools office about what steps I need to take to continue online enrollment and receive aid, Im just stressed and do not want to put this pressure on my family to worry about me. I just need more time to gather myself to be financially prepared, I’ve never experienced any of this before as I’m sure a lot of us are in that boat. I thought my laid off severance package was going to save me when payday came around but once again I’m just left with more things to make right. I put myself in this position, I know that, I just don’t have enough money right now and I am worried because there’s so much on my plate, but nothing in my wallet to support myself and my little family to move without worries, and trying to hide my financial stress. Unemployment still hasn’t even looked at my bank account to see how broke I am lol but it’s all good, I just need to make smart moves and fast! I’m willing to let my account go in red to provide shelter for myself and my honey, and get gifts for my loved ones in celebration on their lives, and fill the fridge in my home but I just have to think logically about this one. These times are too tough to make silly mistakes knowing we can take our time and protect ourselves harder. My loved ones don’t need to worry, and neither do I; I’m just praying to ease my anxiety day by day because I know we all have been through a lot before and after this pandemic… I just need to support, and provide for me and mine. My goals are to put more action behind my needs and more healthy ways of doing things for myself and others. I’m young, (22) but I’m learning. My nephew is turning 13 this weekend, and two of my best friends have the same birthday and they’re joining the 22 club with me finally! I love all of them so much and I don’t want to disappoint them, or give them any worries about me. I just want to focus on fun, that’s what we all need right now. I want to allow myself to be happy, without anxiety, and just use my time to the fullest by being full of life and love for others, it has been so long since I’ve spent time with my family. I saw my coworkers and class work more than I saw my siblings smh. There are times to celebrate, and focus, and I’m pushing forward and will make room for both. I am currently taking online courses for mental health certifications to further my psychology and mental health and wellness knowledge in the field that I am so passionate yet so inexperienced in.
I appreciate you all for reading this, if you ready any of it. I make mistakes and that will probably always be true, but with your support, just know I’ll make better choices knowing someone so special had my back. It is such an amazing thing to reach out and be heard, and I just want to thank anyone in advance for being such a caring, understanding and supportive energy. I will do my part and pay it forward once I’m in a better place! God bless, and positivity to all!!
p.s. these are a few pictures I took and thought were very peaceful and lovely of nature to share with me, especially during stressful times. Mount Tahoma (also known as mt rainier) is so gorgeous I highly recommend for a hike!!!
Truly anything helps you guys. Thank you all again, have an amazing month!!! I wish you all the best!!