Hi. My name is Lily. I’m disabled, and it’s getting worse.
I hope that once you hear my story you will be able to help me.
I grew up in Hampton Roads Virginia with my family, and up until 2019 was a general transcriptionist. I stayed at home because of my severe anxiety and used the time at home to care for my disabled mom and grandma.
In the wake of my grandmother’s death in mid 2019, my family had the opportunity to get away from toxic jobs, abusive family members, and away from the severe southern heat that caused my mom and I to get sicker in the summer.
So we moved up north to Upstate New York. The countryside is beautiful, with mild summers compared to the south, a lot of extra snow, and excellent medicaid. It was perfect for us.
It was here that we could begin to heal from the bad environment we had once lived in.
Then, Covid-19 came and everything was shut down. It was the start of a terrifying time, because my dad has asthma and my mom was suffering from life long chronic illness that made her immune system very weak.
But we made the most of it, wearing masks, washing hands, etc. I even joined the Pfizer vaccine trial in mid 2020 and by pure luck was one of the lucky people who ended up getting the vaccine, unbeknownst to me until I had the standard reaction from the vaccine.
Things seemed good. I was working on healing my severe mental health and in late 2020 I decided that now I would be able to build my life in this new place that afforded us better opportunities.
I had a doctor now, and was recieving actual healthcare for the first time in my life. I joined my local weight loss surgery program, and was on my way to a healthier mind and body.
In early 2021, at the behest of my mom I even got a job outside of the home, something that was impossible with my mental health previously.
The day after my orientation my aunt, who lives with us, was diagnosed with Covid.
The vaccine wasn’t available to the majority of the public yet, so now we had the virus in our house and I was the only one who was even remotely protected.
I hadn’t started my first official day at work and I had to call out for a month.
Roughly two weeks later I called 911 for my mom, because she could barely breathe. The start of the worst nightmare.
She was in the hospital for two days before they put her on a ventilator. For nearly two weeks after that, with my family recovering from Covid, I was managing her care.
Every day brought several updates of bad news. She wasn’t getting better. I begged the doctors to try anything and everything. I sobbed to strangers on the phone, begging them to have mercy and try anything to bring my mom back. I’m not much of a religious person but I was praying every day, and inviting family and friends to pray too. I prayed to every being that ever existed to help us.
On April 3rd, 2021, the doctor told us her condition had deteriorated so badly that the most humane thing was to take her off of life support as he was certain she was suffering under the sedation.
The hospital graciously allowed two family members to be present. Since my dad was sick me and my aunt went.
The ICU was a dark place, very gloomy. We had to wear medical gowns, masks, hats, and gloves in order to be protected.
Watching my mom die was the most traumatic event of my life. I don’t regret staying by her side, but I wish I never had to.
The following week, I had to go to my first ever job outside of the house. And for the majority of the next year I tried so very hard to keep it together. I tried so hard to heal and overcome my tragedies.
But life had other plans, as at work I faced harassment and bullying that the management turned a blind eye to. After several months at work I cut my hours from 40/week to 32/week and took on a less strenuous position. It wasn’t long before I quit my weight loss program because I was unable to stick to it.
However, it didn’t seem to help as around November of 2021 I began to get ill. I was under so much stress that my body began to fail me, and my mental health was suffering as well.
I took a two month leave of absence in the hopes that a much needed break would help. But I quickly discovered that once I didn’t have to struggle to keep moving forward my health would crumble further.
I tried going back to work, but my health hasn’t allowed it. And on Friday, April 15th, 2022 I tried to kill myself.
The pain had become so unbearable that it seemed the only solution was death.
Now, I’ve quit my job and I’m unable to work. If I could just get enough to pay my share of the bills and take care of my my late mom’s elderly dog I might be able to find true rest and recover.
My share of the bills is $650/monthly. This pays for food, gas, utilities, property taxes, phone service, and a couple of streaming services for entertainment.
The monthly care for my dog is approximately $100/month, rounding up to cover vet expenses.
I am hoping to get enough money to cover 12 months worth of rent and pet expenses so I won’t have to worry for a little while.
The total costs would be $9,000USD to pay for a year of modest living.
Please, if you can spare any money at all I would appreciate it so much. Any extra donations will go towards savings.
Thank you so much.
https://www.paypal.me/LDTranscription
@LDTranscription