My name is Maureen, I’m 24 years old, I was born and raised in Las Vegas, Nevada but there is nothing lucky about the state I’m in. This is my turn to present my case of desperation. I’ll start way back at the beginning.
From the age of 4 I was a keen dancer. I enrolled in my first ballet class 1 week short of my 5th birthday.
I was a great dancer. Emphasis on the was. When I was 18 years old I was finding life really hard. I couldn’t keep up with the pressures of school, I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life. I rarely socialised. I was so stressed all time. Riddled with anxiety and depression. It was completely unexplainable.
At age 19 my grandma who lived with us passed away at age 86. She had diabetes and had lost her sight. Well this was just the start of a downward spiral for me. My mental state was almost manic and I began to feel pain all over my body. The pain started in my hip, across my lower back and up my spine. It travelled all through my bones and muscles. I was dizzy, light headed, migraines and headaches galore. I had developed fibromyalgia. The stress of school, the immense pressure I was putting on myself with dancing and the loss of my grandmother had sent me off.
Since being diagnosed my life has changed. I don’t dance as much anymore. I dance now just to keep myself in shape and I barely enjoy it.
However, at the age of 21 I gave birth to my son and actually from that point things started to look up. Child birth really messed up my pain again but he was worth it. I had moved into an apartment with my boyfriend. I actually got a good enough job in an insurance company – nothing too major mostly just doing filing and phone calls. The pain was still present however I was finding ways to cope.
A year and a half ago things started to get bad again. My boyfriend and I split up and I was all on my own with my son. My parents and I speak often but they were quite disappointed that I hadn’t gone to college and had a baby without being married.
I lost my job at the insurance company as they had closed the branch. Since June 2018 I had been working two jobs and trying to balance raising a child. It’s been so difficult as you can imagine
I’ve been trying my best but lately things have got so bad that I really don’t know what to do. I’ve lost one of the jobs during the holidays due to over staffing and things have really started to take a bad turn I’m asking for $2,000 to afford my next rent payment and half of the next payment. Hopefully I will have means to support myself in February however for now I’m at the end of my rope and so close to calling it quits.
Never in my life would I have thought it would come down to this