URGENT: I am sorry this is long, but I do not know what to leave out
- Extreme mental and physical health issues prevent me from working consistently
- Cannot afford medical bills, medication, or therapy
- Huge Debts
- Nearly homeless
Hello. My name is Ashley, and I am a 20 year old college student. A few years ago, I never would have imagined I would be needing to ask anyone for money, at least not a lot of money, because I have always been smart with my finances and been able to work, but here I am. For the last three years, my life has been spiraling apart, and I have officially hit rock bottom. My mental and physical health have been failing me, and this has caused my financial situation to plummet. I have zero dollars in my bank account, had to close my savings account, have huge student loan debt, can barely pay rent, cannot afford more to eat than ramen, can barely afford to feed my dogs, and my doctor’s and medication bills are racking up. I find myself feeling more and more overwhelmed to the point where I often wonder about the point of living if I am forever going to be miserable. The only reason I am still here is because of my dogs and the small bit of hope I have left to turn my life around.
My mental and physical health are horrible, and keep getting worse and worse. When it comes to my physical health, the doctors cannot figure out fully what is wrong with me. I have severe chronic body pain and fatigue, digestion problems, chronic migraines that occur several times a month, severe acid reflux, sinus issues bad enough that I have begun loosing my sense of smell, chronic and painful cystic acne, issues with vertigo, numbness and tingling in my hands and feet, and memory issues. This list may seem crazy and random, and that is because it is. It is incredibly frustrating and debilitating to always feel miserable every day but have no answers as to why. I have been to countless doctors and had countless tests done with little results and huge medical bills to pay. If I ever do figure out what is wrong, I am sure whatever the treatment is will cost outrageous amounts as well.
Now, just due to my medical issues, the work I have done in the past to make money as a swim instructor and as a food service worker are extremely stressful on my body, and I am unable to do them anymore. I have no idea even where to start when it comes to work, as I am not very good with logical, technological, mathematical, or organizational based tasks that would involve desk work, and calling people makes me extremely anxious to the point of panic attack.
When it comes to my mental health, I have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder, anxiety, OCD, and ADHD, as well as a learning disability related to math. I take several medications for this, but they can only do so much when your life is constantly full of financial stress and physical pain. Often times, it is hard to even get out of bed, or I am too anxious to be around people or even talk on the phone. There is little enjoyment in my life, other than what my dogs give me, and everything feels utterly hopeless. I am so constantly overwhelmed, tired, and anxious that it is hard for me to even begin to dig myself out of this financial hole I am in.
My mental health has gotten so bad that I am being forced to take a break from college after failing all of my classes in the last semester due to anxiety and depression getting in the way of me going to class. I have always been an excellent student, having over a 4.0 all throughout high school and even being in the top 10% of my class upon graduating, so this failure really hurts. I have always loved learning, but my mental and physical health, as well as my financial situation have made me dread school and the extra stress it brings. I desperately need weekly therapy, but I cannot even afford the 20 dollar copay needed every time I go. I will not be able to afford to go to my psychiatrist anymore either to keep getting my medication prescriptions. I cannot even afford my medications themselves anymore, and I have no idea what I will do when I run out. Luckily, I do have health insurance through my mother’s work, but I have reached a point where even the co-pay is too much, and that is incredibly overwhelming.
Every time I go looking for jobs, I run across constant roadblocks. Either I cannot physically do them due to my medical issues, my mental health would prevent me from being suitable for the work, I do not have the skills and abilities necessary for the work, or I do not have the qualifying experience or the degree required for the job. Every time I do a job search, it ends in frustration, tears, and panic.
I would ask for help from my family, but they have their own financial struggles, and I would never want to burden them with my problems. They have sacrificed enough for me in my life.
If you have made it through this entire rambling mess, I would appreciate it from the bottom of my heart if you could help me in any way. I owe more than 10,000 dollars just in credit card debt, and my student loans are even worse. It would be even more amazing if I could afford to buy a house for me and my family to live in, to at least confirm I will always have a roof over my head and relieve financial stress from my mom, but I know that is crazy to ask for. I’d be happy even for a few hundred dollars just to buy food for me and my dogs and get into regular therapy. I need to relieve some of this burden and stress, and try to prevent my life from being completely destroyed financially as much as possible, so I can move forward with my life. No matter how much you donate, I would truly be grateful with all my being.
Thank you so much, even if you just read this and listen to my story.