Hello to whomever this may reach, My name is Bianca and I’m currently struggling like I never have before, getting myself deeper in a dark hole of financial stress & debt. I have never been the absolute best in this department but have been able to have at least main major bills covered, however these past few years I went from finally having some of my gray clouds clear a bit and getting to a comfortable stable part of my life after going down a dark road from almost losing my father to cirrhosis of the liver caused by getting too lost in the sauce if you will,that also took my grandfather,myself having kidney issues caused by it. My father was given 3 months max.
I pleaded and swore to my grandparents up above if they kept him alive I too would stop drinking and less than 24 hours after that plea he was granted/chosen to have a second chance which hit me with an urge to celebrate harder and harder until one night my broken promise caught up with me encountering men in black and blue flashing a dash of red too on a night I was working overnight for my fathers company at the time so went from allowing myself to get to a blacked stages which never occurred to getting arrested, getting fired (by my parents) losing my best friend, then having to celebrate my sister’s wedding all 3 days between each other. At that point I knew I was at bottom so dusted off and did what I could to (while not in the least bit easy) to stay sober and get it together was finally at the cusp of it had been a year and all was fantastic had rekindled a past flame which would then have me do a complete 180 flip on togetherness. It was Valentine’s Day 2019(also my late gma’s bday) woke up, looked up and informed her first grand daughter was expecting. Turns out after 10 years off and
on we weren’t good enough to be kept around, was emotionally and mentally jerked around my entire pregnancy, and while considering, had the best experience until birth day where while yes I was manifesting a genius the entire 9 month didn’t think I’d give birth to one, almost took us both out by flipping soo much what I thought were contractions that no machine was getting reads on was actually preforming the 1% occurrence of my son tying a true perfect knot w/ his cord and around his body twice. Was so exciting and felt completely unreal for the first 3 months I was obsessed then month 4 came and in do time I would celebrate my 28th birthday with some family and then… *insert tap on the shoulder* “Hi, I’m COVID-19 but I got by Rona for short” not being able to have anyone be around, hug, or my gosh tap me out when needed even though living at home with my parents to try and save. However with dad’s health had to sneak around the house with my newborn,couldn’t go through same area’s of home if upstairs soon as he walked out we’d have to disperse so much to the point we needed to move out was just too much on all parties involved for “everyones safety”, since becoming a single mother/parent/sole provider then living on our own working full time managing a strenuous position running managing a store front and warehouse large orders with unreliable staff. Then experiencing record breaking snow storms in the Texas causing lives to be lost thinking we weren’t going to make it hadn’t it have been for my 95 lb American Bully Angel girl, our zip code happened to be the only one out the longest with only 30 seconds of power surges . I entered a deep depression after that having it be put all on my shoulders my 1 year old, myself and two fur babies were going to go out that way and with no cell services receive a call from my sister and mother they’re attempting to get candles to bring the hear “omgg we’re going to crash!!” then boom *impact* and call drops never regaining cell signal for hours then distraught upon their arrival with how my mind spun its own web. We then decide to brave the normal 6 min drive to my parents which took approx. 25 min due to yes I was in fact driving 3 Ms. Dasiy’s to finally be inside a home w/ heat and letting out a sigh and cry of relief to be shut down being told to “calm down, its not that bad, no need to over react” since I was told the same thing during child birth triggered another flame in me. Few months go by thinking I’ll be clear but no wait… to find out I have Covid. I truly believe my bully had it too so stuck in an apartment with a toddler whom never caught it and two dogs while being forced to work from home became extraordinarily over whelming also since while even though I didn’t have my sense of smell smelled like something wasn’t right.
Turns out my ceilings were caving in our only rest room also causing the pipes to not work correctly in the only shower being refused services at that time due to protocol for positives cases, which understandable however turns out pipes burst upstairs and had been leaking for months and the entire place was covered in mold. Was able to relocate my small pack to a nicer new town home we adored. I then get let go 2 weeks from my 5+ year position for having to take my sold to the Dr. for the mold issue. Was unadvised how to request unemployment the correct way so was out of almost half my earnings I still have yet to receive to this day since each appeal date coincided with my working schedule. I was running out of options and I attempted to tough it out with company longer than I should have with no residual income coming in. I was asked to leave at the end of my lease due to non payment and they agreed to use my deposit towards any rent due and not file an eviction however only because they almost killed my dogs a few months prior. I was hit with an outrageous amount indicated needing to be paid for damages which only things were where the tv mounts were but I was required to pay org. over $6k however was able to settle for $2,500 in order to have it removed from my credit and allowed to rent a new place. For the few months prior I had been “subleasing” from a friend of the familys that was a complete nightmare the entire place was a hazard zone but couln’t afford anything else however took care of maintenance and housekeeping myself.
Within that short time there I’ve had more hard heart-ships than one should have. Had to let the love of my life go for reasons undisclosed. Went through a health scare with my bully thinking she wouldn’t be with us until my bday causing more stress knowing I couldn’t afford to put her down. Fell unexpectedly head over heels for a crush of mine at work and we dived in too deep too fast to then get dumped the day before Thanksgiving and while trying to pick up my broken pieces of a heart had to be the one to break my sons heart about him leaving him too and add to his already confused mind of his. I had deal with the neighbors’ dogs attacking my little dog and since unable to afford to take them into their vet due to outstanding balances had to patch him up myself. Pipes to the laundry room busted on Christmas eve. I had gotten my vehicle I was so proud that I bought on my own because I was just about to pay it off repo’d since after getting hit by an 18 Wheeler while in the process of the having to relocate wasn’t able to afford the payments along with the insurance. I entered in a deep depression that I still haven’t managed to fully clear,being so overwhelmed by sooo many horrible things that still continue to happen to me/us, and trying to figure out why no one seems to want me or my son. I have however reached out for help and have started taking medication to assist with it. I was able to get an amazing job and just recently moved into a place that with my sons new daycare makes my round trip a total of aprox 7 min vs the 45 – 1hr it took previously. I am horrified though that I’m at the verge of loosing said position due to attendance caused by long commutes and my son being in the extremely argumentative phase making my attendance an issue and being told I will have an eviction notice with my apartments by today due to being unable to make payment for rent because of the mountain of other bills I’m constantly being faced with so are now charging $100 everyday until paid and have given me until Monday to do so. I am doing the best I possibly can with the hand that I have been dealt, but I’m not able to cover that amount and I’m feeling like I’m at a breaking point pinned into a corner. I am aware this was extraordinary over shot however each one of these stories ties into why I’m here today asking for help. I want to be a BETTER MOTHER, Daughter, Girlfriend, Sister, Employee, Friend & all around person. If anyone has made it this far and would be willing to help assist me and my little pack in keeping our home it would truly mean the absolute most to us and I would be forever grateful.
Thank you for your time,
Bianca V.
https://paypal.me/MamaB1830?country.x=US&locale.x=en_US