I thought that the worst was behind us, and that everything was going to be okay. We had about a year and a half of smooth sailing, and in two short months we are worse off than we were before. Sure, maybe we learned some things along the way, met some nice people, but none of those things will help us now that we are in the eye of the hurricane, and soon the storm will pass and I hope I have the courage to open my eyes and see where we landed.
We are 52 years old, and I am living on borrowed time. I had three years to live four years ago and everyday has become harder and harder to live in my failing body. My wife on the other hand will most likely live to be 100, and I will have left her with absolutely nothing, and it breaks my heart.
She was laid off from a job she loved two months ago. I expected her to jump right into something else without batting an eye, but she didn’t. I don’t think I understood how heartbroken she was about losing her job or that her job represented security. For the first time since I have known her her eyes lost the sparkle and she looked lost. She always got the first job she applied to her entire life, and she had three rejection letters in one week.
We had a break in the weather last week and she landed a job, and I was ready to get our lives moving again. That is until the car wont start. Not only will it not start, it is never going to run again without a new engine. Our 2007 mustang died on August 1, 2019 under the hot Arizona sunshine. She starts her job on Tuesday, and I have no idea how to get her day after day without wheels. We don’t have public transportation, and we can’t afford UBER everyday.
I tell myself “We will figure it out, we always do.”
The knock on the door this morning at 8:00 a.m. left me breathless. We are one month behind on rent, but now that she is working again I figured we would be caught up in no time. The eviction papers have given us 14 days to move.
“We will figure it out, we always do. We need help this time.”