Hello,
I am humbly requesting assistance to help cover overdue rent after experiencing my first ever true financial hardship that has led to me receiving a notice to vacate my rental home. I expect suit to be filed any day now for the eviction process.
On February 28, 2023, I made the decision to end an abusive relationship with my husband of 7 years. It wasn’t something I planned on. I did not know that I would have the courage to leave my husband that day. I was presented with the rare opportunity of having him away from the house for an extended period that evening. Although he was not home, he made it clear via text messages that trouble would ensue when he made it home due to an argument we were having. I knew in my heart that I could no longer endure the terror he consistently brought into our home, nor could I continue allowing my children to witness this type of behavior. Without putting much thought into anything, I locked all of the doors and windows and requested the presence of a police officer to come before he made it home.
Unfortunately, the police did not arrive before my husband did. Consequently, he tried breaking in; first through the garage, then our front door, both of which suffered damage and had to be repaired. Thankfully, the police arrived in the midst of this event, all while I was on the phone with 911 where they were talking me through what to do if he made it in the house.
The officer interviewed my husband first since he witnessed the attempted break-in. I don’t know the extent of that conversation, but the officer told me that there were no legal ramifications for this, since my husband was within his legal right to break into his own home. He interviewed me thoroughly to understand my situation and document what I feared would happen if he remained in the home. I would prefer to spare the gory details of that, but based on what I told the officer, he was genuinely concerned for the safety of my children and me. He wasn’t optimistic that he could convince my husband to leave on his own free will, and because there was no physical abuse present at that time, there were no grounds to arrest him or forcefully remove him.
The officer proceeded to go outside where my husband had been waiting and had a lengthy conversation with him for what seemed to be about 20 minutes. I don’t know the full extent of what occurred during this conversation either, but it appeared to have made an impression because my husband shockingly agreed to leave. The only thing I know about that conversation was that my husband was told that he was not being arrested at that time, but if the police had to come back later, there would likely be arrested upon their return.
That was the last time I saw my husband. He left the state of Texas and now resides in Billings, Montana with his family. Although our lives have been more peaceful in numerous ways, the emotional aftermath I experienced with my children was more painful than I ever could have imagined. 7 years of built of grief had to be dealt with all at one time. Two kids both hated him in many ways for the abuse they witnessed, but they also never actually endured the abuse personally. He treated them decently. Now they’re left with the confusion of both missing him and hating him. On top of that, I began facing the reality of what I had truly been enduring for the last 7 years, but worse than that was what I forced my children to endure at no choice of their own. The guilt and shame associated with abuse, after you put an end to it, is something almost indescribable. When you downplay things for long enough, you begin to believe your own lies, until one day you finally face the truth for what it is. I used to talk about women in abusive relationships like they were crazy. Then here I am, finding myself being one of “those” women. We’re continuing to work through this as a family, and I hope to get family counseling for all of us soon. It’s been a struggle, but I am hopeful and optimistic for our future healing.
Months prior to this traumatic event, I made the decision to leave my job in hospital management around December 2022 to start a company of my own. Little did I know that would be the main contributing factor to my abusive marriage becoming exponentially worse than it already was. Although our finances were stable, he lacked the ability to control me through my income and felt as though I was now controlling him, since he began having to pay bills with his own money.
In the grand scheme of things, I was free and clear of this horrific man, but jobless with 2 kids and a business that still isn’t fully ready. I had some savings in a hidden bank account, I started gig working and doing everything possible to stay afloat until I could get my business off the ground. I was able to do so successfully for the last few months, but it’s ultimately caught up to me and I now know that I need to go back to working full-time in the medical field and wait to start my business until the time is right.
I applied for government benefits that I was told I qualified for. This was supposed to cover about ¾ of my rent for the month but today, I was met with a denial due to exceeding their income threshold. This came as massive shock to me, and now I am faced with having to uproot my children from the home we’ve lived in for years now, unless I can come up with enough funds to pay my leasing agency before they file for eviction in court. I have looked into alternative resources for rent assistance, but have been met with declinations due to lack of funding, lottery systems that give me no guarantee of assistance, or waiting periods longer than I am able to wait.
I have already applied for legal assistance in the event I am not able to pull things together before court papers are filed, but hope it doesn’t get to that point.
My total balance due is $2,089.71. I personally have $827.57 in available funds, which leaves me in a deficit of $1,262.14.
I am going to continue doing everything in my power to earn the funds needed until it’s no longer an option, I will go back to gig-working as soon as I am done posting this. Any assistance given to help me reach that goal would be appreciated in ways that I cannot describe in words.
I am in the process of trying to get one of my old jobs back and will find another job if that doesn’t work out. Financial stability is near, but unfortunately not close enough. I feel foolish for allowing it to get to this point, as I am typically very on the ball about finances and being prepared for the worst, but this entire situation has somewhat broken me down as a person. With that being said, I am determined to pick myself back up stronger than I was before to set an example for my children that’s better than the one I had been setting for the last 7 years.
If any assistance is granted, I am more than happy to pay it back in installments once I am back in the workforce. Unfortunately, I have no one else to ask and my credit is in a state of disrepair because of my husband’s spending habits. This may be my only hope, so I figured it was worth a shot, as humbling as it may be to ask complete strangers for help when not too long ago, I held a respectable position within a Houston hospital.
To anyone that has taken the time to read my story, I sincerely thank you. I am hopeful that one day this will all lead to something great.
Sincerely,
Christy