I’m not one to ask for help, any kind of help…not because asking for help is bad or wrong, I’ve just always been the helper , very rarely the helpee. The last couple years though, has all but killed me. My Dad was diagnosed with bone cancer, and watching my hero, my best friend, my rock, the ONE person I knew without a doubt would always be on my side and never ever do anything to go against me….was a Hell like no other. Since that hell though, Ive been faced with another hell after another….4 months after losing my dad, our family home burned down. To try and save as many momentos as possible …I volunteered to do the fire demo. Boy, you live and you learn. That again, was a hell like no other in so many ways and on so many levels. I finished the job though, and to say it was tough would be the biggest understatement of the century. I was proud though, and the more work I did and the more i accomplished on our 20 acres….the closer I felt to my Dad. Even though life was kicking my butt up until that point, I was managing and still able to care for my mother, who I did not know at that time was being catfished and taken for every penny she/we had. She was lonely….I get that. But, continuing to talk to this catfish who was getting all her money, to the point of her begging myself and family members to buy her coffee or bread, ciggarettes, coffee creamer, etc. It got so bad, all the money I was making while working at my job, was going to my mom to take care of her and her needs such as groceries, toiletries, rent. Etc. It was hard, but i was making it work. At the time I was also allowing a life-long family friend live with me, and I was caring for him as he was dying of stage 4 lung cancer. Along with myself being sick and only getting worse, with severe anemia and a major vitamin deficiency, along with cervical cancer and all the fun that comes with them all such as debilitating migraines, complete teeth loss and malnutrition, etc. Even though times havent looked so bleak….was still trying to stay positive until one day the oxygen machine and all the lights just went off at my place….found out my Mom SOLD my family land of 20 acres that she and my dad bought in the 70s. I since, was given the land and even purchased some to help my Mom out financially, etc. She had resold it all behind my back….and I mean ALLL. My stuff, my buildings, my house, my vehicles, all my Dad left me….EVERYTHING INCLUDED. :( :(To who? “Friends” if you can call them that….that weve known our entire life. You wouldnt ever guess that though, the second those papers were signed they were on my doorstep to start the control party :( So many things happened, all during this time, none good…and due to the power being forced off, I had to get my friend i was caring for to other care, and tried sooooo hard to get what I could if mine and my dads and my life….but they made it absolutely impossible. When I could find a ride to try and get anything at all, I was met with dogs and guns and threats and ….it eas no longer home and they made it as I said impossible to even get my dolls my dad got me, my slumberland furniture I was so dang proud of buying all by myself, my dads fireplace, his trucks,I couldnt get anything :( I had absolutely nowhere to go with my little chihuahua Bentley….except my moms house she was renting with a roomate….and dont ask me how, but long story short because I had a little dog that was cleaner than most people….I got evicted from my mothera house and I was never even on the lease! :( And the sucky/sick/wierd thing is….my Mom seemed to be ok with it? Well, thank God a friend came back from living in North Carolina for sometime….and heard what was going on….he put Bentley and I up in a hotel for over 2 months. That started getting extremely expensive though, and he got a friends parents to agree to let me stay in their basement the rest of the winter if I clean and redo it and the yard in the summer. Etc. Ok! Maybe things were starting to look up? ….No :( Ive been ….and there simply is NO other word i could possibly use than ….SUFFERING, in absolutely every way possible! Im thankful for a place to stay, but since ive been here, its been nothing but threats, demands, sick tortured conversations, and commands. Etc. I havent actually been in a bath or shower since January 18th. When in the basement I bathroomed in a bucket, until i was moved out into the camper before it was warm enough and it was so cold and the floors were so water damaged and when I was finally able to use the porta potty…I quickly so learned I would have to empty it every few days along with the gray water tank, etc. It may seem like I’m tattling or complaining and to hear im seriously not a tattler or complainer would be hippocriticle, after reading my story so far….but really i am not. Im just at my whits end. Im at rock bottom. I cant handle one more day of being laughed at or bullied, or blamed for whatever anyone decides to blame me for. I work and make $$ as a PCA , but if i dont pay whatever im told to and when, the camper door gets kicked in and I’m berated and threatened and always left with nothing….bentley and I work our butts off and do everything for everyone….we have nothing left in life but sickness, starving, water so bad you cant drink it….and stuck so far out of town with no way in unless you beg someone….depression, loneliness, nowhere to go now after about a week or two they said…and it will be cold anyway….we’re at complete and utter loss and despair….:( I wanted so badly to get an attorney somehow because everything and how i lost….my land and everything was just so wrong. But, instead….Here I sit. A once super happy, healthy , help everyone possible, positive polly…..turned everyones cinderella rag doll good for nothing negative nancy. :( Help! I am more than willing to pay back any penny that is sent our way. I know dang well Bentley would be beyond thankful for some dog food and puppy pads….instead of the homemade things I’ve been making her because we cant afford them and any food possible Im able to get…I make sure she eats and I try to eat whatever is left but its hard because I have no insurance either and have tried so hard to get it back, but because of the vitamin deficiency and now not able to swallow pills and losing allmy teeth and have so many absess I’m in constant pain and well….cry like an idiot nonstop it feels. I pray every night for everyone else….but now I pray for once, for Bentley and i. Im sorry if thats selfish….but I feel I’ve tried and tried and helped and done everything absolutely possible to be a good peraon my whole life and help others and always pay it forward and volunteer, etc….maybe just maybe…..this one time it might be ok…..to ask others to help us? :( Not afraid of hard work and willing to work my butt off until im not on this earth anymore even to pay everyone back that finds it in their hearts to help us. Thank you so much in advance….even for reading our story, bentley and I. We only have had eachother to talk to, so it was kind of nice to feel like there may have been others listening to what we had to say this time. Thank you and God bless!
paypal.me/BlackNsilver83