- ALRIGHTY THEN.
Hello everyone. My name is Laura and I’m only 20 years old. Im on this website because I’m very desperate. In the past week I have been stressing out because of money reasons that I will disclose in the next few 100 words or so.
In a span of 3 days I lost my job, lost the love of my life, learned I’m getting evicted, and my roommate tried killing himself. A lot right? Oh, yeah.
I worked for my friend, for two years. He owned a online business where we sold nerdy collectibles and toys. I had my dream job of doing data entry for him. Weird, right? A 20 year old totally in love with a desk job, but it was my dream job. I could dress however I wanted to and work for however long I wanted to. Perfect in my eyes.
Also, I had so much fun at this job and learned so much I didn’t know before.
He had to shut down the business though because we were trying to merge with another company who put us in major amount of debt. So after 2 whole years of finally being in a stable job it’s gone in a matter of a few seconds.
This same friend allowed me to move into the house he was renting at so I didn’t have to live with my parents anymore. I was so appreciative of him letting me move in. Finally!!! Making it on my own and not depending on my parents. Again perfect.
I was really happy for the first time in a long time, because I suffer from really bad depression and anxiety. (I tried killing myself last year on Christmas. My best friend found me bleeding out in his bathroom floor on Christmas night. Went the the hospital and got stitched up.) I thought to myself that I can actually do something on my own. That I can really make it in this world.
But after my friend had to shut down his business our landlord started to raise our rent. We barely have any money for food, let alone rent. We tried explaining to our landlord about our issues but he just refused to hear us out. So he evicted us and we have until the day AFTER Christmas to move out.
I got a text from him (friend/roommate) that day when I was out running errands with my boyfriend that he was gonna kill himself. I freaked out and had my boyfriend take me home, but when I got there my roommate wasn’t home. I started panicking even more. I tried calling him and texting him but no answer.
He gets home about an hour later. My boyfriend and I are in my room, trying to stay calm. I hear my roommate puking in the bathroom and I’m too scared to check in on him, so my boyfriend went to go check in on him. He comes back and tells me he is passed out on his bed, still breathing. I calm down a bit. He is here and safe.
Moments later cops come to the house. I then break down and have a major panic attack. I had another roommate go answer the door because I just couldn’t. I overhear that they are just here for a wellness check. My friend is coherent and doesn’t need to go to the hospital.
I calm down more after overhearing that.
After the cops left, my boyfriend does. He has his own things he had to go do and said I should stay here just incase. I agreed and let him leave.
I am so emotionally exhausted and decide to take a nap. When I wake up so is my friend and we talk about things. We figured out what he had to do for his mental health. I agreed that he needed to move back in with his parents and I move in with my boyfriend.
So, everything is fine right?
The next day feeling a bit better that things will be ok, I go Christmas shopping with my female best friend. I wasn’t planning on getting my boyfriend anything yet but I found the perfect present for him and spent the last bit of my money on it.
Too excited about it I call him to come over so I can go ahead and give it to him. (I’m awful at gift giving for this reason.) He said he would be right over.
When he got here to my place I gave him his present instantly. Something was off though. He didn’t seem very happy about it. I asked him what was wrong and he told me we needed to talk.
My stomach fell instantly.
He broke up with me of course. He told me the reason was that he couldn’t handle my stressful life. Never did I ask him to help me out. Never did I ask him for anything but to listen to me. He offered for me to move in with him and help me out.
Heart broken I told him he needed to leave. He couldn’t even look me in the eye or say anything.
I called my best friend and asked if she could come get me. If she didn’t I was gonna kill myself. Everything in a span of three days just went down the toilet.
She came quickly and I spent the night with her and her family which is also basically my family.
She told me that we could find an apartment and move out together. Even though she has a significant other.
But I don’t want to have her fully support me. So, for the past week I have been looking at apartments and applying to jobs. That’s all I have been doing in my free time.
Stress is consuming me and Christmas is coming up.
To top it all off I asked my dad if I could spend the night on Christmas and he told me he had to check.
For his own daughter to spend the night on Christmas. Just for one night.
I cried so hard at that.
It really hurt and broke me even more.
I don’t like asking people for help.
But I am so very desperate for money for an apartment so I won’t be homeless. So I won’t starve or kill myself.
I know that this isn’t anyone’s problem but my own, but I’d really appreciate any amount of money.
I feel like I’ve hit rock bottom but I have no other option until I find a job, but it’s hard around Christmas time.
So for anyone that has read this even if you don’t donate any money I thank you.
Cause it helps to talk about your problems, even if it to strangers.
Thank you and I hope everyone has a better holiday season than I have so far.