Hi, My name is Amy. I’m the youngest of eight, raised by my single mother. Five siblings came from my mothers first abusive marriage. Two more came from second marriage,(love of her life) he passed away. Then there’s me. The third girl after five boys. The age gap grew with each sibling. My oldest sister Sylvia was eighteen years older but more like a mother. Sylvia had a daughter whom was nine days older than myself. I remember her daughter had everything. The looks, the clothes, and oh, the barbies! I was too young to realize so many differences between her daughters and my life. And we most certainly had different lives. Talk about the human experiment! Everybody but me already knew I didn’t have the best odds of success. My mom was always gone to work. Somebody was supposed to watch me as a kid but as soon as my mother left, so did everybody else. I had two friends that I would alternate between so I wouldn’t upset parents for being there every night. I was the only one that didn’t have somebody yelling for them when it started to get dark. No support at home. No support for school work either. I should of been diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder (ADHD) but was never seen for any kind of mental health disorder until my late twenties. I was always the odd one out. My teeth gave me nightmares. My brother called me snaggletooth because my teeth were so off centered, it looked like one big tooth in the middle and other teeth turned around backwards. I have a big nose that I used to attribute to “being Italian!”, I have since found out, thanks to Ancestry DNA (and my sister), that I was NOT a product of my mothers third marriage. I was treated differently by some family members that despised the man they thought was my father. He was a con and a thief. That’s all I ever heard about the man. And that he was married to another woman at the same time as my mom and my mom caught him at a store charging everything for this “other” family to my moms credit card. My siblings resentment towards that man was directly reflected on their tone and actions against me. I didn’t feel liked, let alone loved. Nobody ever came to school plays or functions. Only my sister showed up after my first born. Ninety eight percent of my hospital stays/surgeries have been by myself. No help after major surgeries. No babysitter, housekeeper or cook. I soldier on. I make it a mission to help others any way I can so they aren’t completely alone through life’s trials. I’m a giver not a taker and don’t want to ask for help because whenever I have asked in the past, I’m always too late because either they already helped so and so or don’t have any “extra” funds or just plain don’t care I guess. I’m just one of those people that others assume different from me and once they get to know me always say, “oh your not at all like I thought you would be” or “On paper you come off as trouble but your not a problem like I thought you would be”….huh? And that insensitive comment came from a substance abuse counselor!! Can I write this in parts?..lol
https://www.paypal.me/AmeRising
A~Me Rising~i hope