To be honest I am going out on a limb. Here is the worst year of my life, but let me give you some background first.
I was married 14 years, have a wonderful daughter but a very unfaithful husband. Thanksgiving weekend in 2007 he told me he wanted a divorce, fell I love with someone serious this time.
Then I was in a 6 year relationship, he decided that it was the family “my daughter and I) not me. Since she was now a sophomore in college, he have me 2 years to make a plan and get out. I left in 30 days.
I thought I found the love of my life. Truly. That first touch sent electric through my veins. The first year was a little rocky but we made it through to 4 and 1/2. We had the best relationship, really in love. We thanked our stars over and over on a regular basis. We went out of town to see my daughter and her boyfriend and to celebrate this loves birthday, turning 51. He had spend 2 months getting in the best shape of his life and life could not have been better. Again when coming home Sunday so grateful how wonderful our lives were together. That was April 14, 2019.
April 15th I lost my job and came home 2 hours early. I walked in the door knowing that he would be there to support me, I didn’t want to call and give the bad news. I walked in and he greeted me at our bedroom door naked. He told me I should not go in because he was with someone. I plowed through and come to find out it was a barely 20 year-old service tech that worked for him. She has no education, unattractive and certainly not what I would ever think to be his type. Yes, she just turned 20 the November before and he just turned 51.
When she finally got out of the house I noticed there was a gift on the counter. In the card she wrote sweet nothings which included that he completed her life. What?? He completed her? Turns out they had been seeing each other for months. Neither my daughter who was living at home at the time nor I had even one clue. They kept it to her mothers home where she lived, hotels on Saturdays when I was working and now our home at least 2x. I was devastated and he was gone.
So with this, I took on all the bills which he paid more than I ever did because he made more. My daughter could not go through it with me and she moved in with her grandparents. (she now lives in another state) and I was unemployed with no one. I have no family. Few friends because he was my best friend. I thought I would die and still at times feel that way.
So, 8 months later. I try to be stronger everyday. I try to learn to trust. At 51, that is tough. Childhood and adulthood has not taught me much about that. I do have a job now and I do my best to stay positive at work. However everyday when I’m working, and especially every other week when I work 6 days it’s difficult but I know it is what I have to do to keep my home and keep food in my stomach.
Back to why I am here. For the first time I have decided I will not let someone take my home from me. I make enough to pay the necessities but there is this lingering debt over my head that just keeps getting worse. The cards have turned into collections. My credit used to be so good, now it is so far gone I can’t even get a loan or consolidation from even the worst lenders. I think of this everyday and it makes me just want to return to drastic measures. I wonder… why am I even here? I know if I could just get rid of this $5000 in debt I would be ok. I tried debt settlement but less than $7500 they barely speak to me. I don’t want to file bankruptcy, that will only prove to be too long out at my age and I did that after my divorce so I could raise my child the best financially I could.
That is when I thought, are there really kind people? Is there anyone out there that would help me? I am not asking for a Christmas. I just want a fresh start without this debt so I can live the last few years above water. I have no retirement (jobs did not offer), my health insurance went up another $120 and now I have the opportunity for 401K but that is another $200 a month. Now with this additional starting soon I can still pay my bills but anything extra is out of the question. So this little credit card debt will be looming over me forever until gone.
There are 5 accounts. Anything will help. I will start with the smallest and work my way to the largest. Please help if you can. If not, just a prayer and word of encouragement would mean so much as well.
Thank you with all of my heart. I am not a bad person, Lord knows I try. I just need to start over yet once again.