I know this is probably the same story everyone has and the same problems but I just thought I’d post this, because I just feel so desperate and I have no idea what to do anymore. I’ve been diagnosed with OCD and anxiety since I was 7. My mom always babied me and still does. But I still love her. Currently I live with my grandma because I have a really bad phobia of seeing or even hearing other family members. I don’t know why I just melt down and my head gets cold every time. I’ve spent my whole life in my room sheltered from everything and constantly asking my mom for reassurance from anything and everything. I can’t even wash my hands or put on my shoes without it being a 30 minute ritual. Not to mention when I’m anxious I pluck my eyebrows or shave them. So going outside is almost impossible for me because apparently to my parents I look like an alien. My friend constantly tries to get me out of the house and I appreciate it but it just breaks me down. Just a couple days ago my friend got me to go with him on vacation literally last minute. I panicked and agreed and I still regret it. The whole trip is going so wrong and I’ve been acting like a bad friend. I just can’t help it I’m freaking out the whole time and don’t want to do anything. I feel so bad because I ruined the trip for them. So we deiced to go to Walmart at like 1 am and I was tired but it was just me and him so I felt comfortable and he told me to fill up gas. I was panicking in my head but didn’t have the nerves to tell ask him to do it. I asked him over 5 questions on how to use it and everything seemed like it was fine until the day after it got towed my mom asked me if that pump fit it in the whole and I remembered it didn’t. So I must of put diesel in the car and never realized it before it was to late. I just don’t know anyway to come up with the money. I just want things to be normal again. I never really dealt with money and I understand I have to eventually but for all of this to hit at once is just insane. I’m just hoping for any kind of help I can possibly get. Thank you if you read this and consider helping me.