I was 19yrs old. I had a life ahead of me. I joined the US Army in 2000 fresh out of high school. I joined to ensure my future (or so I thought) but I had another reason too. My mother was very ill and could not work anymore. I thought if I joined and gave her access to my bank account she would be taken care of and so would I. I did my basic training, it was very hard but I did it. I was ambitious, determined,outgoing and just a happy-go-lucky young woman. After basic training I went on to AIT which is advanced individual training. Not long after I got there and had turned 19 my mother died. It was devastating to say the least. My mother was my world, my everything. Who was I going to turn to? Who was going to give me wisdom and guide me thru life? But as any normal person I had to continue on with my life. After her death I was sent straight to Korea. It was extremely hard to be away from what little family I had left. But what could I do? I was 19 I didnt know anything. While in Korea the unthinkable happened..I was raped by a fellow soldier. I was so sad and depression set in. This was just too much for me so I tried to kill myself (one of many that followed) by overdosing on percocet. Im not sure how I ended up at the hospital. While laying on what I was sure was my death bed the doctor came in to announce I was pregnant..from the rape. I informed my superior officer that was in the room with me what happened. She told me “Go off post and get an abortion”. Keep in mind that abortion is illegal in Korea. To go off post and find an underground abortion clinic was not an option I was way scared. But I couldn’t come back to the US until I was 6 months pregnant. Then it would be illegal here too. So I had no choice. I gave birth to her in 2002. Giving her up for adoption wasn’t a choice because I had family near by that wouldn’t let me. After she was born I would say I was totally out of my mind which lead to an Honorable discharge from the military. By this time im 20 with a little baby thrust out of the military with no home to go to. Every single year has been a nightmare. In and out of mental hospitals, suicide attempts, and constantly cutting. No one cared, not even my family. When people tried to help me and they got into the details of the torment I have faced they turn away because even to them its overwhelming. I been fighting so long for military compensation but they keep asking for more proof. This child is now 14yrs old and I am 34. They did DNA which said she was 99.9999999% his. Im not sure what more proof you need. I do not sleep at night because I fear every night he is going to come back and get us. I know its highly unlikely but the fear is very real. I can not go in public around crowds because I start to sweat and get dizzy then I pass out. I have no trust at all. And I fear I will never get a husband because when i am touched or pretty much anything sexual I freak out and runaway. I pretty much keep my daughter prisoner, no after school activities, no going over friends houses, I wont even let her walk down the street. I am afraid that someone will hurt her like I was hurt. That is a pain I dont think I could bare. I struggle to feed her and clothe her. And give her furniture that she needs. Its hard doing it on my own. Its even harder when the person you strive to make happy looks exactly like the person who took your life away. She told me once “If you couldn’t provide for me you shoulda thought about that before having me.” I know she is a child and she dont know better. But it felt like she shot me thru the heart with a gun. I didn’t tell her how she got here and she never not even once asked about a dad. She worries quite about about food because I do. I believe in God. But why must I go thru this. I been patient, I been praising God. I have been going to church. I have done everything right. But is been 14yrs omg im so tired of living like this. I know I’ll never be rich. I will never have the house with the pool and the white picket fence. I’ll never meet an loving man thats understanding and willing to stand by me and support me in what im facing. I know I will spend the rest of my life alone. I know I’ll never own my home an will forever be renting. I know these things and I am content with that. Miracles happen every single day so why not to me too. I have moved to a place that helps me with my rent and I go to counseling now seeking help from the demons that torture me mentally. But we struggle just to eat. I just want enough to catch up my bills get my kids a real bed and start trying to rebuild my life. I am trying to remain anonymous to protect my daughter. She is unaware as to how she came to be here. But if you want to help me and you have bank of america you can send me funds to firstname.lastname@example.org
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Being a single mother especially in today’s era can be extremely overwhelming. If you are one of those mothers who is doing it alone every day you know what I am talking about. It seems like the bills just continue to pile up and never end.
Researchers have said that just in 2015 year ending alone over 80 percent of the households in America that we’re single households we’re in fact ran by a FEMALE head of household which we’re mostly living very poor.
Many people may say well there is government assistance for them to get a grant but it’s hard to find and information regarding that said topic anywhere. So in hopes to help the single mothers out in the world this article will give you some insight on the different assistance topics we can cover including where and how to get a grant or scholarship. Also, you will read and see how simple it is to receive help with income expenses and medical insurance.
Are there really grants for a single mother?
Of course they do but these grants are not only for single mothers. However, that doesn’t mean there isn’t help for a mother to receive one. I know its mind boggling that the government hasn’t had any means created for money for a single mother that is actually in the shape of a grant. One thing the government does for a single mother is they assist them through a group or have set sponsors through a company, and sometimes they are covered by the actual income assistance completely.
Below are a few websites that will redirect you to free items that you can get just for registering on the website.
Low Income Assistance for Single Mothers / Government Grants
As I said there is not an official grant for a single mother available that is FEDERAL. However a single mother can go through federal programs and register and sign up for them. Those kinds of programs are usually for households with low income. Which means you would also qualify for Welfare. No matter what the case these are programs to help those who make below the limit and live poorly.
Below are different types of assistance based in the United States.
TANF – TEMPORARY ASSISTANCE FOR NEEDY FAMILIES
TANF is a crucial for many low income families located within the US.
With TANF you receive a small amount of cash every month that you can use toward your food, rent, and other necessities. However you only receive TANF for up to 60 month limit.
If you are a single mother and you have children in your home who are less than 19 years old you are eligible for TANF.
SNAP – SUPPLEMENTAL NUTRITION ASSISTANCE PROGRAM
Food-stamps or SNAP as other people may refer to is financial help for meals. You can receive money every month to place food on the table if you are on low or no income.
For most of Americans living in poverty SNAP is potentially the only assistance they can get.
Research has shown that in 2015 SNAP benefits have helped at least 45 million Americans. Most of the ones who receive the stamps are under are up to the age of 18.
When you go to use your benefits for SNAP you have your own personal debit card to ring your groceries up with at the register. If you are interested in trying to get on with SNAP benefits all you have to do is fill and application out and send it in or take it into a local office that deals with SNAP benefits.
NSLP – NATIONAL SCHOOL LUNCH PROGRAM
This is a program that gives free (or discounted) food to students whose parent’s income is bellow a poverty level. The income needs to be at least between 130-185 percent bellow the poverty line.
Most the time if a person is a receiver of SNAP benefits their children will be accepted into this program for free lunches. But, that doesn’t mean if you don’t have or receive SNAP that your children are disqualified.
You need to contact your child’s school to apply.
TEFAP – THE EMERGENCY FOOD ASSISTANCE PROGRAM
Food for the American families who are in the poverty range not matter what the age.
If you have received food stamps before or any other program assisting you and helping you such as the ones in this article you could also be approved for this program.
You will need to contact your State distribution agency to learn more about the Emergency food assistance program.
Local Food Banks
A food bank doesn’t exactly fit into the whole “Grant” program area as it is actually a location in your town where you can get food if you are in need.
Do not allow you or your family to go without food. If you ever reach that trouble you can call 211 and ask them where the nearest food bank is based on your location.
More then 200 food banks exist with the feeding america foundation and they supply enough food to feed over 40 million people.
WIC – WOMEN, INFANTS AND CHILDREN PROGRAM
This program includes a package deal where you as a mother are able to receive healthy foods, whether you are pregnant or a new mother, and also to children who are 5 or under.
WIC is a program that is temporary and only used for a short amount of time – usually between 6 to 12 months.
EARLY HEAD START / HEAD START
These programs are for children up to 5 years old.
You can receive free child’s medical and dental care along with their schooling, and dietary needs.
Find your closes headstart office on their website or call at 1-866-763-6481.
Insurance for unemployment
This is a special program which will pay you weekly if you are unemployed and it had nothing to do with you for you being fired or let go. You will only be able to receive this benefit for maximum 26 weeks. Different states have different benefit rules. But most states will average out at about 45% of whatever the average weekly income is.
Single mothers who are out of a job temporarily can find solace with these benefits and can help make the burden less for themselves because this pay will restore what you have lost from losing your work.
If you want to try and get this started and opened for you, you will have to find your local unemployment office or apply on the website for this specific program. Most states will allow you to also try to sign up for this over the phone.
Section 8 housing
Section 8 is basically a program that helps a family be able to pay for their housing. If approved you will receive a voucher of up to 70 percent of your bills (utilities and rent). You are expected to pay the other 30 percent.
If you want to apply and feel you qualify you can get in touch with your local office involved with public housing, the HUD office.
CCAP – CHILD CARE ASSISTANCE PROGRAM
This is a benefit for families who can’t afford to place their children in daycare while working.
You still have to pay a certain percentage but it isn’t a big lump of money. The less you earn, the less you need to contribute.
EITC – Earned Income Tax Credit
It is a tax benefit for people with low income. You could potentially get as much as $6,000.
If you normally have a tax rate of $1050 but you are allowed $5550 then you get refund of $4500.
There is a Children’s Tax Credit too for as much as $1,000 for EACH child.
LIHEAP – LOW INCOME HOME ENERGY ASSISTANCE PROGRAMLIHEAP is a program that is a one time help to help pay for heating / cooling expenses.
Most of the time this is for the disabled or families with children or disabled person in the home.
If you need any extra information regarding this topic you can get in touch through the number 1-866-674-6327 or a local number for your local LIHEAP office.
WAP – WEATHERIZATION ASSISTANCE PROGRAM
Weatherization assistance program lowers energy bills for families in need. Usually the elderly and families involving children are accepted and put to the top of the list before all.
Your monthly income need to be below 200 percent poverty level.
To apply, find a local WAP center.
Medicaid is help with medical expenses. If you do not have health insurance this gives you certain benefits as long as your income restriction meets the level it should.
A lot of single mothers may meet the standards to be recipients of Medicaid even if you are unemployed.
Every state has different rules about Medicaid plans. You can find out exact requirements on this website.
Together with ObamaCare it ensures that even single mothers who didn’t receive any health benefits will now be able to have coverage.
CHIP – CHILDREN HEALTH INSURANCE
CHIP gives children without health insurance a chance to have health benefits all the way up until they are nineteen. It is for families whose income is too high to receive Medicaid benefits.
It provides every type of benefit you can think of — dental, eye exams, and even annual doctor’s exams.
Every state has its own rules. If you would like to learn a little more about this specific benefit you can call 1-877 Kids now (1-877-543-7669)
Federal Pell Grants
Aid program for students of up to $5,815 for those in need to be able to set foot into college.
This is the best opportunity for a mother who is single to finally be able to finish her schooling and finally continue in the workforce. The money is completely free of charge with no interest rates or paybacks ever.
You need to fill out an application and submit it for a pell grant and have it turned in on or before June 30th of every year.
Federal Supplemental Education Opportunity Grant
Similar to the Pell Grant. If you already have had pell grants and you are at the top of the charts in need you will be first on the list to receive this. Depending on a persons needs that are wrapped in with their financial struggle will ultimately decide who will receive anywhere between $100 too $4,000 annually.
Charities can be a way to seek help for you and your children whether you are in need of food or clothing or even housing. A lot of charities around the world actually have their own food banks that they run and they will give you bags of free food.
If you go to salvation army a lot of the times they will let you sleep there if you have no where else to go especially if it is a result of violence.
Most churches will offer you food and clothes or maybe even a place to stay if you have been recently kicked out by the one you are living with.
To find information on this you should look through your phone books local listing or yellow page. You can also research online and see what churches are available to your area and call them and ask what services they do offer.
Single moms can receive loans usually relatively quickly but I would not recommended that at all. You could potentially go into debt and not be able to rise back from that.
Sometimes you have no choice because you have to fix your broken car or maybe pay for utilities and food and need the help right then. But you have to be able to pay that loan realistically quick.
Pay attention to your credit because if you try to get a loan through a bank or anyone they will check your credit score and see if it is even available to be able to place a loan out to you. If it is a loan that is for payday loans or credit card advances they will not run a check but you will end up paying more after fees and costs.
Line of Credit
If your credit is decent some people ask a bank for a loan personally. Most of the time this is a better idea then asking for a payday loan because if you need quick money with lower rates of interest this is it.
On a personal loan interest is lower dramatically but you have to pay in instalments. It doesn’t really fit criteria for an emergency. Normally if you just tell them you do not have any more funds and that is why you need this they will turn you away. If your credit is poor you will not be able to even touch this offer.
Short term (payday) loans
This is a very popular type of loan. You may know it by the term “Cash advance.” The interest runs really high on these and it is a loan that is only for a small time frame.
This is a loan that would more then likely be considered if a problem arises and you needed to repair your car or had a disastrous dental emergency. You have to know for sure you will be able to give every penny back.
If you do not pay this type of loan back you could be in loads of trouble financially.
Credit card cash advance
Do you own a credit card? If so you will be able to get money from a bank as easy as 1, 2, 3. This is not a method that is highly praised though because as soon as you start taking money out of the bank the interest keeps rising and you also are charged for using and pulling out of the bank a fee. This is potentially the easier options if you do need cash asap but you have to pay it back and make sure you absolutely can.
When it is all said and done grants will not solve your money issues within your home if that is what you expect. To get a grant is definitely not easy it isn’t a walk in the park by any means.
If you are looking to get a more stable source of financially being stable you should probably look in areas around you or find a women shelter until you can get back up on your feet.
If you think you have all the time in the world you can apply for other areas of assistance such as Food stamps, HUD, and etc. They do take a lot of time and effort for someone to get back with you and let you know if you have been accepted and enrolled. Try finding a part time working job as a way to financially start becoming stable again.
The moral of this is you can not expect a grant to fall into your hands without effort and take all your worries away. They are only here too do one thing and that doesn’t usually fix anything with your financial setting.
This is all on you and what you decide, no one else can decide for you.
My story begins in 2009 when my son was 4 years old and I was getting divorced. At the time I was already grounded in my career with the federal government, 20 years of civil service. At the time the stress of my divorce along with work was a bit overwhelming and I realized I have to be there more for my little boy. I left my career and obtained my Realtors license hoping to be able to set my schedule around my sons schedule so I was home with him more. The real estate market at this time was horrible even for veteran agents much less a new agent. I started dipping into my 401k until it was depleted. I began looking for other options and applying for jobs everywhere. I received the same response “why would you accept this position if you’re background is so intense, we fear you’re only accepting this job as a stepping stone until you go back with the government”. No one could understand I was mentally exhausted from my career and needed to focus on raising my son. I always felt a parent must take a strong role in raising their children especially these days and my main focus was on him…. And then of course money. How can I do this! I quickly became the Jill of all trades. I worked in retail sales which was grueling because sales I found was not my gig, dishonesty doesn’t work well for me. When my son completed elementary school I was very aware that he was a genius and public schools were not going to suit his needs and he was extremely bored and unchallenged. The school system was failing him. I decided to try homeschooling. He was immediately 100%ready and on board. At the time I home schooled during the day and bartended in a local dive at night. Yes, mom was exhausted but mom was also focused and in overdrive to make this work. He was doing absolutely amazing and the change in his personality was even more amazing. So we continued and I worked nights in a unpleasant bar for 3 years. I was never able to set aside “me money” just paid bills and made sure he had everything he needed. This didn’t bother me because the bond my son and I have is so tremendous and it’s because I was always there. I was ready to get back to my career……. Not so easy, not what I expected after 20 years of service. I couldn’t get my foot back in the door and back into a career I held for so long! The economy has made it difficult for someone with my extensive background because there is plenty of job seekers willing to accept less. Ok I’m willing to accept less too…… Back to the “why would we hire you and why would you accept such a low salary in comparison to what you have made”. I was lucky and was hired as a Contractor for the VA. Awesome, the break I was looking for…… Contract expired and was not renewed. Out of work again. I applied everywhere again and I was offered a job at a car dealership. Ugh sales, well it’s a check so ok. I was put through some of the most ridiculous mental abuse (or attempts at mental abuse, I don’t allow others to get to me). Since I didn’t fall into their games I was let go with a lame reason of we have to let go of some people our numbers are not good. Now I’m back seeking for a job. We want to move out of the state and start fresh, I want to open a holistic shop up north but I need to financially establish myself here now before I can move forward. I spend hours day and night shooting my resume straight into the dark hole of the Internet only to receive a ton of calls by fake recruiters. It’s a job in itself sifting through the fake job postings and competing with hundreds of applicants on legit job announcements. I’ve received so many possibilities with Sikorsky but they always fall through. Either they removed the job or hired someone with a law degree (seems lawyers are struggling in this market too, great more competition and less offers). I forgot to mention earlier what my position was with the government. I started as a purchasing agent when I graduated high school and worked my way up as a Contracting Officer. Now I’m sitting here still behind on bills from my layoff with the VA last year. I’ve applied for state assistance and got nowhere with that, not sure why I just get no return phone calls. I only wanted help with food stamps but no one returns my request. A system I spent my entire life contributing to ignores me. I was able to make arrangements with my utility companies but even those arrangements are difficult when you bring in so little on unemployment. We have been in our rent since my divorce and right now I fear we are going to be asked to leave. I’ve been paying the rent but late. I give my landlord what I can when I can but all my income goes straight to rent and everything else has to wait. Or rent has to wait and electric gets paid. It’s a juggle I can no longer do and for some reason help is not offered to a single mom who receives child support which also is not much. It’s very discouraging that our system which was designed to assist families for a short term does not work that way so those of us who need short term help are refused. I am at a point where I no longer know what to do, I’ve sold anything of any value I owned other than my car which I need. We no longer have TV or internet so my son now spends most of his time at my mothers where he can use her computer. He’s such an amazing kid and I have no regrets for up and leaving my career because I look at him now 13 years old and so appreciative for all I’ve done. I want to be able to send him to a private school so he can be around kids like him, kids that are goal driven like him. He loves learning and in his spare time he’s watching documentaries. At the age of 7 he self taught himself computer animation and made a video using pivot software. He has had his own computer since he was 2 and it’s his passion. His dad is in IT (for GE, and as you may know GE has left CT so he’s out looking for work as well, not easy for experienced backgrounds). Right now my son is very focused on computer programming and has been studying code for 3 years. He has also studied IT security. He knows computer programming is what he’s passionate about and I wish I had the money to send him to a school for programming. He is self taught in programming as well and is absolutely amazing at it. He said to me recently that he admires me because I worked so hard and somehow I always made everything work and I did it alone for 9 years. That really got me thinking and I’m not sure how I did this for so long alone when I see so many not able to do it with 2 working adults. I have to say I admire my son and the respectful mature man he has become. I really need to get all my bills current and my rent current. Meanwhile it’s off to sifting through the endless array of online jobs and the feeling of did I send a blank resume to hundreds of people! Thank you in advance for any help or guidance.
Everyone needs a little help every once in a while and I am pretty desperate at this point.
Long story short: My husband and I have been together for almost 7 years, and married for about 3 years. Our marriage was toxic not only for us, but for my kids as well.
Both of my parents have passed away (mom when I was 15, and Dad just a year ago) so I knew that when I decided to leave, I would be doing this on my own.
Since I am the one that left, my husband is fighting me on every little thing, including custody of my son. His dad is taking care of his lawyer fees, so I am left trying to figure out a way to come up with money for a lawyer for myself.
I currently work two jobs, making good money; however, everything I make goes straight to bills. (over $3000/month in bills) I have applied for more credit cards, and personal loans and have been denied for every one. My debt to income is too high.
I’ve tried to receive assistance, and I make too much for that. I am basically left with signing over primary custody of my son so that I will have to pay child support, which I will NEVER agree to.
I am hoping to come up with enough money to at least consolidated my debt so that I can pay for a lawyer.
I just want what is best for my children. They deserve a happy, steady home with both parents.
I have 5 beautiful children 1 to 16. There father abandoned us for drugs and I cant find a job because I was a stay at home mom and out of work for years. I look everyday and will continue to until I get one. I want to have a home for my kids. I want them to have stability,I want them to be happy everyday. They are really good kids. I certainly dont want to ask for help but I Love my children more than my pride. Thank you for your consideration.
My wife’s sister is a lives in a medium sized town in middle Vietnam. She has 2 kids who are 8 and 2. She was forced to divorce her husband due to his alcoholism. After seeing him spend all the money he ever had on alcohol she divorced him and threw him out. Unfortunately she only works part-time, and does not make nearly enough to support herself and her 2 kids. Me and my wife try to help out as best we can by sending money, but we also have bills to pay, and what we can send is not enough. So I am asking any goodhearted person out there to aid me and my wife in helping out her sister, as her no-good husband does not help at all with the feeding and clothing of his own children.
Any help would be appreciated greatly, and bless your soul